Archive for the ‘public education’ Category

“Why does he DO that?” A walk on the wild side…. [with some 2013 updates]

(note — see the comment, from 2009. The person “gets” what I was doing in the post, thank you!)

I am speaking as an owner and long-time appreciator of the book. “Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry & Controlling Men.”.. which showed up like a savior, emotionally, right as my case plummeted from stablized position under protection of a restraining order, into the volatile, “mandatory-mediation” arena of Family Court, which reminded me of “Chutes and Ladders”, with more chutes than ladders.

You take one false step (or have your family placed at the top of a chute through being hauled into this venue) and are on a chute.

Kind of like life WITH the abusive guy (or woman) to start with, anyhow, huh? Hmm… Wonder why they function similarly!

(The post on “Family Court Matters a la board-games” is in pre-development stage, meaning, a little gleam in the blogger’s eye still. Paper, Scissors Stone (last post) got me thinking for sure…..)

If you haven’t read Lundy Bancroft’s material AND/OR you are not yourself a victim or being forced to co-parent with a batterer, you’re not fully informed in the domestic violence field, period.

(2013 Update, In Hindsight):

Then again, if we’d all been talking about something besides “batterers” perhaps neither Batterers Intervention Programs nor “domestic violence” would have developed into “fields,” coalitions, or industries.

And the conversation about those fields and how THEY operate is the conversation that no one seems to want to talk about, even as updates to “The Batterer As Parent” have been published and being circulated in various circles.

I mean, think about it (why didn’t we earlier??) There is a crime called “assault and battery” — but by the time someone has become a “batter-er” that means, it’s habitual — which means someone else is experiencing “domestic violence.” How can you domesticate “violence” and what’s domestic about it? (Well, you can tame down its labeling and call it domestic “abuse” — which has been done…

In fact, as it turns out, “BIPs” are actually diversionary programs to criminal prosecution for the beating up on others. Some people figured out, along with programs like, “moral reconation therapy(tm)” and Psychoeducational classes for kids undergoing divorce — that the more programs the merrier. I guess… The money is made upfront in the trainings, yours truly (The United States Government, which is essentially “yours truly” — the taxpayers) set up the policies and the corporations and then runs the population through them every time someone shows up actually needing some realtime social service — or justice — or help.

I can’t explain it too well in a single post, but this conflict was staged and manipulated in order to obtain more and more central control (literally, an economic stranglehold) on most of us through those of us that are willing to sell out for collaboration, sales, and the conference circuit. As sincere or genuine as these individuals may be, I do know they are playing on empathy to increase sales. I do not know whether or not they see the endgame, after their own use has expired in the long-range plan of bankrupting Americans so we are left as a human resource without other options than begging or slavery, at a sheer subsistence level.

Some of us have been their in marriage, we have been there AFTER filing restraining orders, which were intended to protect us (allegedly), but we were NOT there after even a year or two in the family court Archipelago.

Somehow, in this destitute and distressed state, we grasp at straws of empathy and keep referring friends and neighbors to explain our own situation to the same types of information — such as if only someone would JUST UNDERSTAND batterers’ psyches, our kids would be safer, and life would be better.

Anyhow, what follows was from very early in this blog (October 2009) and shows my understanding at that time. Even then, I was questioning the logic of the question.

Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Let's Get Honest|She Looks It Up

October 8, 2009 at 7:59 PM

Analyze This: Wichita Woes — What happened after 911? (1st time, 2nd time).

with 2 comments

I rest my case on “certifiably insane protection orders”. . . .

This article is a quiz (answers below). Do this:

A. Put events in order.

B. What piece of the puzzle doesn’t “fit” and which pieces are missing?

C. Keeping this within Kansas, bring this case history to Senator Oletha Faust-Goudeau, recently found sponsoring (yet another) Fatherhood act of some sort in Kansas and ask for commentary. Request permission to record, and share on youtube with the rest of us, why a man like this needed to be within cutting/shooting range of his 21 month old daughter. (Because if he didn’t get this, someone was going to pay, bad?). And how the (decade-plus) of prior fatherhood initiatives may or may not have contributed to this young man’s sense that after punching XXX officers and threatening to slit the throat of his wife, for calling for help, society still owed him something…

D. Rewrite the headline, more appropriately reflecting the crucial issues in the case.

And then Alternately

E-1. Pray to the tooth fairy that this isn’t you or anyone you know and/or recite after me:

E-2. “it spiraled out of control. We had no idea. It spiraled out of control. The real social crisis of our time is fatherlessness, not lawlessness. It wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t her fault. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. Nevertheless, the Feds + faith-based + local agencies will fix this situation. We WILL eradicate violence against women and murder by men if we JUST try harder, train more professionals, and dump some dollars in that direction. We WILL, right??”

The children are our future. Now, Where’s that Valium?

Suspect in deputy’s shooting had violent past

. . . (and they married WHY???)

Comments (0)

BY TIM POTTER

The Wichita Eagle

The 27-year-old man accused this week of ambushing a Sedgwick County sheriff’s deputy had a history of violence against his ex-wife — and against officers.

{{For why the word “had” is used, see 2nd article, below}}

In 2005, Richard Lyons’ ex-wife, Jenifer, accused him of holding a hunting knife to her throat and threatening to kill her after she called 911, an affidavit filed in Sedgwick County District Court said.

Lyons pleaded guilty to aggravated assault and served several months in the county jail followed by about 16 months in a state prison.

He was released on parole on March 2, 2007. His sentence and parole supervision ended on April 11, 2008, records show.

In March 2005, four Wichita police officers responded to a report of a disturbance with a knife at his ex-wife’s home in the 900 block of South Waverly, in southeast Wichita.

Lyons had arrived and “demanded she give him their infant daughter,” the affidavit said.

She reported that they argued and that after she called 911, Lyons held a 4- to 6-inch knife blade to her throat and threatened her. The knife reportedly came from a sheath attached to his pants.

“Jenifer said she hung up the phone because she was in fear for her life and believed Richard would carry out his threat,” said the document, used to bring the felony aggravated assault charge against Lyons.

On the 911 call, a male voice could be heard saying, “I will cut you,” the affidavit said.

When he went to get a diaper bag in another part of the house, his ex-wife grabbed her two children and fled, the affidavit said.

At the home, officers found signs of a disturbance, and when they tried to arrest Lyons, he punched two officers, the document said.

Although prosecutors also initially charged him with two counts of misdemeanor battery against an officer, those two charges were dismissed after he agreed to plead guilty to the more serious charge of aggravated assault, records show.

His ex-wife obtained a protection-from-abuse order against Lyons.

In April 2005, about a month after the incident involving his ex-wife, court records show Lyons was living at the house where he is accused of shooting Deputy Brian Etheridge this week — first with a rifle and then with the deputy’s own gun.

Etheridge was responding to a 911 call from the South Rock Road residence, reporting a theft — a report authorities now think was concocted.

In Lyons’ 2005 divorce case, court records say he was working for Colortime in El Dorado at the time. The court at one point required him to pay $234 a month in child support.

At another point in 2005, Lyons temporarily lost visitation with his 1 1/2-year-old daughter because of the incident involving his ex-wife.

On Tuesday, a man who said he was Lyons’ father declined to comment.

Lyons’ ex-wife could not be reached.

In September 2003, about two years before the knife incident, Lyons was convicted of misdemeanor battery against an officer.

In the years before that, he had been convicted of felony criminal threat and misdemeanor domestic battery and criminal damage to property, records show.

As a juvenile, he had misdemeanor convictions dating to 1995, when he was 12, for criminal damage to property.

Wichita school district records show that Lyons withdrew from Metro Boulevard Alternative High School in July 2002.

Contributing: Hurst Laviana of The Eagle Reach Tim Potter at 316-268-6684 or tpotter@wichitaeagle.com.

QUIZ ANSWERS (mine) BELOW: (I interspersed A & B as dialogue)

Events, apparent order (quite different from article, which jumps around considerably)

1995 Juvenile Richard Lyons, age 12, has misdemeanor convictions for criminal damage to property, ergo he was born about 1983.
July 2002, Lyons withdraws from alternative high school (age, about 19)
Between age of majority (2001?) and 2003, he has convictions for felony criminal threat AND misdemeanor domestic battery, meaning, probably against a WIFE or GIRLFRIEND. This is called “domestic violence,” folks. SEE 1994 VAWA Act.
??? somewhere in there he gets married to Jenifer Lyons.
Sept. 2003, misdemeanor Battery against an officer.
Somewhere in 2003 Jenifer gives birth to his child. (Note: Physical assaults sometimes begin with pregnancy. Mine did).
Somewhere between then and 2005, they get divorced. (Given the assaults, probably understandable. What’s not quite understandable is why they got married, unless the pregnancy PLUS her lack of other options to survive (i.e., HER family of origin support), PLUS no doubt some of this federal pushing of marriage on everyone…?? Who knows. Maybe they wanted to. Maybe HER household (how old was she?) was a place she needed to get out of.
By 2005, he has a child support order in place and is actually, it appears working. Apparently they’ve entered the family court system somehow, I’d guess. The man is all of 22 years old, so this is a good thing and possibly a change for him?
THIS IS TAKING LONGER THAN I PLANNED.
OBVIOUSLY they had “visitation” (unsupervised, obviously). Note: He assaults women AND officers, felony-style, and threatenes (someone — seee above). He destroys property and punches policemen. NEVERTHELESS, an infant needs her Daddy. Daddies can be nurturers too. If we try hard enough, perhaps all of us (through funds, and social support and of course parenting classes) can transform this young man into a real nurturer before he kills someone for telling he can’t combine nurturing infants with wife assault.

Now in March 2005, things start getting, well, interesting:

“In 2005, Richard Lyons’ ex-wife, Jenifer, accused him of holding a hunting knife to her throat and threatening to kill her after she called 911, an affidavit filed in Sedgwick County District Court said“
HEre’s the account, I rearranged some sentences. Apparently by now there are 2 children (both his? Maybe not?)

Lyons had arrived (EXCHANGE OF THE KIDS RIGHT? Here’s a CLASSIC CASE involving DV, and no help with the exchange. Yes, I’d imagine this was in family law system already, totally oblivious (per se!) to the potential danger of the situation, despite lethality assessments and DV literature dating back to at least 1985 (Barbara J. HART), 1989 (Family Visitation Centers started in Duluth Minnesota), 1994 (Violence Against Women Act) and all kinds of other literature. THis hadn’t reaached the “heartland” yet, I guess. ) and “demanded she give him their infant daughter,” the affidavit said. ((OMISSION – was there a custody/visitation in order or not? if so, was it clear and specific, as many states require (but don’t practice) cases involving DV be, to avoid incidents like this? If it WAS clear and specific, was his demand in compliance with or NOT in compliance with that order? As they say, and we see, this isn’t typically a guy that plays by the rules, not even the rules for graduating from high school, or refraining from damaing others’ propery. We’ll, he’s about graduate from punching officers to putting a knife to his wife’s throat. I wonder if this was the first time….)

She reported that they argued {{POSSIBLY OVER WHETHER OR NOT IT WAS HIS TIME TO SEE HIS DAUGHTER?}} and that after she called 911, {{POSSIBLY THE ARGUMENT CONTAINED SOME THREAT OR PHYSICAL ELEMENTS?}} Lyons held a 4- to 6-inch knife blade to her throat and threatened her. The knife reportedly came from a sheath attached to his pants. {{May I speculate that perhaps Mrs. Lyons was aware that Mr. Lyons sometimes carried knives, and this may have contributed to her decision to call 911, even if the argument was only “verbal” in nature?}}

On the 911 call, a male voice could be heard saying, “I will cut you,” the affidavit said. (I’m going to assume this is “evidence” and it was his, not a responding officer’s. I will further assume that this was a criminal prosecution, because someone actually got ahold of that 911 call. GIVEN the history, was this a creditable threat? It appears to the reader that her report was accurate in this part. Contrary to the “false allegations” stigma associated with women reporting violence (or threats of it), ” because they want to get custody,” this report seems to have some merit.

“Jenifer said she hung up the phone because she was in fear for her life and believed Richard would carry out his threat,” said the document, used to bring the felony aggravated assault charge against Lyons. {AS FURTHER DEVELOPMENTS SHOW, YES HE WAS CAPABLE OF AND WILLING TO COMMIT MURDER WHEN HE FELT WRONGED OR WAS ANGRY OR ?? SO HERE, SHE DROPS THE “911” METHOD OF SELF PRESERVATION AND, if I may add, protecting her children, WITH HER KIDS OPTS FOR THE “FLEE” METHOD. Amazingly, a charge was actually filed. For why, possibly, read on.

When he went to get a diaper bag in another part of the house, his ex-wife grabbed her two children and fled, the affidavit said. {{I have done this flee while he’s in the other part of the house routine, often enough}}

HERE COME THE RESPONDING OFFICERS: In March 2005, four Wichita police officers responded to a report of a disturbance with a knife at his ex-wife’s home in the 900 block of South Waverly, in southeast Wichita. {{Officers KNOW domestic violence wih a weapon can be lethal. They didn’t send one custody evaluator, one parenting educator, one mediator, and one guardian ad litem, they sent FOUR officers, and I BET they were armed… Yet women are left to face this, sometimes weekly, without adequate protection.}}

At the home, officers found signs of a disturbance, and when they tried to arrest Lyons, he punched two officers, the document said.

Not one but 2 officers. Tell them to thank Wade Horn, George Bush (Jr.), former President Clinton, present President Obama, (well, adjust for the year), and others for those punches to the face. Father-engagement. Healthy Families. . .. You’re in it. . . . . . . Were these male and female officers, I wonder, and which ones got punched. But in an incident, it could easily be any of them.

Moving on in our sequencing:

5. Prosecutors initially charged him with two counts of misdemeanor battery against an officer.

6. he agreed to plead guilty to the more serious charge of aggravated assault. (good move, as they saw evidence, and he was already heard on tape threatening to cut her.)

7. The lesser charges (above) were dismissed. Is this called a “plea-bargain?

8. His ex-wife obtained a protection-from-abuse order against Lyons. (((WHEN?? see last post on police reporting of incidents). Now? Or had she earlier? Criminal, or civil?)

NOW — figure out this timeline if you can:

9. Lyons pleaded guilty to aggravated assault (See 6, above. WHEN? WHAT MONTH 2005?) and

10. served several months in the county jail followed by about 16 months in a state prison.

March 2007 is 24 months from March 2005 (date of assault). Ergo “about 16 months” plus “several months” possibly does NOT add up to 24. How many people do this kind of mental math when reading leading bleeding headlines?

March 2005 (arguing, resulting in 911 call, threatening to slit wife’s throat in retaliation for calling 911, with 2 kids, one of them a toddler girl, in the home, Mom + 2 flee for safety, 4 police come, 2 of whom are punched) – March 2007 is most definitely 24.

The question is, what is “several” months? Is it 8, or 9 (8 + 16 = 24, right?) WHEN did he plea-bargain? After punching officers and threatening to kill wife was he then RELEASED in this foul mood? If he threatened to slit her throat and assaulted people who tried to help in March 2005, what kind of response might we expect after being sentenced, if he was released on bail?

11. He was released on parole on March 2, 2007.

12. His sentence and parole supervision ended on April 11, 2008, records show.

What this section of reporting does is to reassure that his crime (of — see above) was indeed punished properly. Or was it?

13. In April 2005, about a month after the incident involving his ex-wife, court records show Lyons was living at the house where he is accused of shooting Deputy Brian Etheridge this week — first with a rifle and then with the deputy’s own gun.

Omittting the obvious — after arrest (i’m going to hazard a guess that the 2 punched officers or their colleagues eventually handcufffed the guy) he was free on bail or own recognizance until arraignment and incarceration

YES, you read it right, finally. Threaten to slit her throat, punch TWO responding officers, and get out scot free, for a few months. This is an interesting sentence (I don’t operate under press deadlines, but still . . . . . the sentence bridges four years of time: 2005 & 2009!) Well, not quite scot free. He was punished with not seeing his daughter, “temporarily.” Wonder what time frame THAT word spans.

14. At another point in 2005, {{Can we get a hint which month?}} Lyons temporarily lost visitation with his 1 1/2-year-old daughter because of the incident involving his ex-wife.

When I filed for a DV restraining order with kickout, and we had the guns, knives and assaults thing, but not on officers — we got ALMOST 7 days with no visitation, as I recall. Perhaps at the most 14, as he had to find a place to live.

Now here is about the slain officer:

Sheriff was Ambushed

A black band around the badge of Sheriff Bob Hinshaw. The badges are in honor of deputy Brian Etheridge, who was shot and killed in the line of duty on Monday.

WICHITA – Richard Lyons set the trap shortly before noon on Monday by calling 911 to report a theft at his house.

He then hid in the shadows of a tree and brush in the backyard of a house in the 3600 block of South Rock Road with a high-powered rifle, authorities said Tuesday. He waited for a law enforcement officer to show up.

That happened to be Sedgwick County sheriff’s Deputy Brian Etheridge.

“It does appear to have been an ambush situation,” Sheriff Bob Hinshaw said Tuesday of the shooting death of Etheridge, 26, the first Sedgwick County deputy to die in the line of duty in 12 years.

Lyons, 27, was shot to death a few hours later in a field not far from the house in an exchange of gunfire with law enforcement officers.

“It’s scary,” Hinshaw said. “It could have been any law enforcement officer… this was just a call to 911 to get any officer to respond.”

Investigators spent Monday night and Tuesday collecting shell casings and other evidence, Hinshaw said, piecing together a chain of events from what was left behind.

Based on that evidence, Hinshaw offered this account:

Lyons called 911 at 11:42 a.m. Etheridge was dispatched to the address just east of McConnell Air Force Base and radioed his arrival at 11:51 a.m.

When no one answered his knock on the front door, he asked dispatchers for contact information for the caller. He then walked around to the backyard of the house and saw no one.

Lyons was hiding in the shadows on the bright, sunny day, and opened fire with a .30-30 rifle — a weapon commonly used by deer hunters — when Etheridge turned his back as he was either approaching the back door or returning to the front of the house, Hinshaw said.

The bullet hit Etheridge in the back, penetrating his body armor and knocking him down. Lyons approached the fallen deputy and tried to fire his rifle again, but it malfunctioned.

He took Etheridge’s gun and shot him in the leg before disappearing.

Etheridge radioed for help, and scores of law enforcement officers from throughout the metropolitan area converged on the scene.

The wounded deputy was alert and communicating with the first officers on the scene, Hinshaw said, but their priority at that time was his medical care — not gathering information about the suspect.

Escorted by patrol cars, an ambulance raced Etheridge to Wesley Medical Center, where he underwent surgery.

Authorities established a one-mile perimeter around the house and urged residents inside that area to leave if possible.

Wichita Police Chief Norman Williams said authorities had information indicating Lyons was likely inside the house, so that address remained the focus of their attention even as law enforcement officers combed outlying areas within the perimeter.

Tear gas was deployed twice into the house in attempt to flush the suspect out, Williams said, and SWAT team members were preparing to blast open the front door at about 5:15 p.m. when authorities were notified that the suspect had been spotted hiding near a tree row in a nearby field.

Agents from the Kansas Highway Patrol and the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives were patrolling a field in a Humvee when one of the officers spotted Lyons’ leg as he lay on the ground.

They stopped the Humvee, and Lyons stood up and fired at the vehicle with the deputy’s handgun. He then began running, firing several more shots as the ATF agents and KHP officers ran after him.

The law enforcement officers returned fire, striking Lyons “multiple times,” Hinshaw said.

Lyons was taken to Wesley Medical Center, where he was pronounced dead at 6:10 p.m.

Investigators hope to talk to neighbors and relatives of Lyons, Hinshaw said, but he doesn’t expect every question raised by the shooting to be answered.

“We may never know what the motive is,” he said.

Results of the investigation, including the use of force, will be presented to the District Attorney’s Office for review.

Flags at Wichita City Hall and other city buildings have been lowered to half staff in honor of Etheridge. They will remain at half staff through Friday, the day of Etheridge’s funeral.

“We’re just really shocked and saddened by what has happened,” Mayor Carl Brewer said. “It has affected all of our law enforcement agencies.”

Brewer said the city is providing counselors for police officers who were involved in the shoot-out and others who may be shaken by the violence.

“Every time they make a stop or enter a house, they don’t know what’s going to happen,” he said. “This demonstrated just how much risk there is.”

Reach Stan Finger at 316-268-6437 or sfinger@wichitaeagle.com.

FIRST 911 — from a woman — consequence, she’s threatened and has to flee for her life, BUT her ex-husband IS jailed — for about 2 years, or less.

SECOND 911 — from the formerly jailed young man (27 yrs old is young) — his ambush. SOMEONE was going to pay. Was Etheridge (the officer killed) a responding officer in the former arrest, or just anyone in uniform would do? Was he upset at what had happened in prison?

Was this suicide by cop? Sounds like possibly, to me.

WOULD IT HAVE PLAYED OUT DIFFERENTLY IF THE COUPLE HAD STAYED TOGETHER, OR WOULD SHE BE A STATISTIC, NOT THE OFFICER?

ANYONE WANT TO DO A PSYCHOLOGICAL WORK-UP ON THIS ONE (PLACE BESIDE THE WORK-UPS ON PHILLIP GARRIDO, AND HIS WIFE?) WAS IT UNEMPLOYMENT MADE HIM DO IT? WAS IT THE CHILD SUPPORRT ORDER? WAS IT ACTUALLY TAKING CONSEQUENCES FOR CRIMINAL ACTIVITY? WAS IT HIS LACK OF A FATHER IN THE YOUTHFUL HOME (FATHER CONTACTED DECLINED TO COMMENT). DID HE NOT HAVE A PLACE IN SOCIETY, WAS THAT IT? WAS HE ON MEDS? was he FORMERLY ON MEDS AND NOW OFF MEDS?

WOULD’IT HAVE BEEN BETTER TO, AT ABOUT $20K/PRISONER/YEAR (??) KEEP HIM IN LONGER, OR INDEFINITELY?

DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I SAID EARLIER ABOUT “COLLATERAL DAMAGES” OF DV (OR SIMILAR PHRASE) IN YESTERDAY’S POST?

I do have one comment, here: Something sounds narcissistic in the mix. This person was supposedly a hell-raiser from an early age, but didn’t get help. Possib ly being a father was a shot at sanity, but I think that the child support order was probably NOT a good idea for such a person. It would’ve been better for all to let her do welfare. She’d probably get off it quicker without the threats to her life than with them.

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE RESOURCES IN KANSAS:

http://www.ksag.org/page/domestic-violence (Attorney General Site):

Domestic Violence

The new Domestic Violence Unit within the Kansas Attorney General’s Office seeks to keep our families safe, stop domestic abuse and end the cycle of violence that threatens our communities.

Online Resources:

Kansas Elements and Standards of Batterer Intervention Programs in Kansas (NEW)
Cycle of Violence (printable flier): Learn to recognize the phases and symptoms of domestic violence.
Warning signs of an abusive relationship
Common characteristics of battered persons and abusers

(Be sure to catch this “get inside their head” speculation (many didn’t apply to my case, i know): date:

Source: The Battered Woman by Lenore Walker, Harper & Roe, 1979. (I’m comforted to know that the Attorney General has the latest psychological profile of batterers and their victims — only 30 years old…..)

Believes all the myths about battering relationships {{NO one questioned me, and I hadn’t heard these…}}
A traditionalist about the home, strongly believes in family unity and the prescribed sex role stereotype {{The alternative being, punishment….}} {{BY THE WAY, this now describes the Health and Human Services Dept., in general, on this matter….}}
Accepts responsibility for the batterer’s actions {{SAYS WHO?}}

Resources for Law Enforcement

Application Materials (updated for FY2010)

Child Exchange and Visitation Center Program – (CEVC)

This program provides supervised child exchange or supervised child visitation to children and families at risk because of circumstances relating to neglect; substance abuse; emotional, physical, or sexual abuse; domestic or family violence; etc. The state portion of funding can be used to fund the local match required for receipt of federal child exchange and visitation center grants.

Mighta been helpful for Jenifer Lyons . . . . .

The Essential Elements and Standards of

Batterer Intervention Programs in Kansas

The Essential Elements and Standards of Batterer Intervention Programs were developed over

seven years through the hard work of many professionals who are dedicated to ending

domestic violence in Kansas. The Kansas Coalition Against Sexual and Domestic Violence

convened the initial work group and wishes to thank the following organizations for their work

during this process:

Developed and/or Reviewed by representatives from the following:

Alternatives to Battering, Topeka

Correctional Counseling of Kansas, Wichita {{MAYBE Mr. Lyons got this and didn’t take kindly to it?”}}{{Or, the problem was, he DIDN’t get it?}}

Family Crisis Center, Great Bend

Governor’s Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board

Halley Counseling, P.A., Girard

Johnson County Office of Court Services

The Family Peace Initiative, Girard

Kansas District Judges’ Association

Kansas Attorney General Carla Stovall

Kansas Attorney General Steve Six

Kansas Coalition Against Sexual and Domestic Violence

Kansas County and District Attorney Association

Kansas Department of Corrections

The Mental Health Consortium

Office of Judicial Administration

Sexual Assault/Domestic Violence Center, Hutchinson

Wyandotte Mental Health Center

Family Crisis Center, GreatIn 2007, The Governor’s Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board (GDVFRB), chaired by

former Attorney General Robert Stephen appointed a subcommittee to review and update the

Essential Elements and Standards of Batterer Intervention Programs. The GDVFRB adopted

these as best practice standards in providing batterer intervention programming in Kansas, and

recommended that the Office of Attorney General implement a training and certification program

for providers of batterers intervention programs.

Attorney General Steve Six readily accepted the recommendation to train and certify batterer

intervention providers in Kansas using the Essential Elements and Standards of Batterer

Intervention Programs in Kansas.

For More information about this initiative, contact the

Director of Victim Services in the office of

Kansas Attorney General

Steve N. Six

120 S.W. 10th Avenue

Topeka KS 66612-1597

785/368-8445

“FATHERHOOD IN KANSAS (google, results 124,000)

ACCESS VISITATION IN KANSAS:

Child Custody, Support and Visitation Rights – Kansas Bar …

Visitation, often called “access” is the right of the parent who does not …. Child support and visitation are considered by statute in Kansas to be two …
http://www.ksbar.org/public/public…/child_custody.shtml – Cached – Similar –

Crisis Resource Center of SE Kansas –

Child Exchange and Visitation Center. 669 South 69 Hwy. … Wichita Childrens Home Child Access. 810 North Holyoke …
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cse/…/access_visitation…/ks.html – Cached – Similar –

Kansas Governor Mark Parkinson website … Funding Source, The Federal State Access &Visitation grant program is a formula grant program to states and …
http://www.governor.ks.gov/grants/grants_savppp.htm – Cached – Similar –

Overland Park Visitation Attorney | Leawood KS Parenting Plans …

Visitation & Parenting Plans. Kansas Visitation Lawyer … custody or non- residential custody, your children have the right of access to both parents. …
http://www.cavlaw.com/PracticeAreas/Visitation-Parenting-Plans.asp – Similar –

You will have access, at our Download Site, to the legal forms you need to modify custody-visitation in Kansas.

These forms are the most current versions …
http://www.custodycenter.com/MODIFYCUSTODY-KS/index.html

Paternity Fathers Rights Attorney Kansas | Johnson County …

Following an emotional breakup, many moms allow or deny visitation by whim, {{OR WHEN HE THREATENS TO SLIT ONE’s THROAT< CASE IN POINT}}

leaving the dads without regular access to their children. …
http://www.kslegalhelp.com/Divorce-and-Family…/Paternity.shtml – Cached – Similar –

YES, THERE WAS A DIRE LACK OF SERVICES FOR MR. LYONS…

Written by Let's Get Honest|She Looks It Up

September 30, 2009 at 3:02 PM

Today’s post is a new blog page: “Lessons from Antioch” (California)

“Wife Abuse and Custody and Visitation by the Abuser” –A Man Speaks from the Past (1989).

This voice from the past (1989 to 2009 = 20 years!) —

is pretty well drowned out by “the Duluth Model,” and the millions of $$ of grants, funds, and now even new professions springing up, all to help avoid what I’d call THIS common sense. I guess I will have to show. This will deal with the issue of Supervised Visitation: The question nowadays is how to make it safe, etc. The question of why ANY visitation with such violence, scarcely gets raised again.

Wife Abuse and Child Custody and Visitation by the Abuser

by Kendall Segel-Evans

originally published:
ENDING MEN’S VIOLENCE NEWSLETTER, Fall, 1989

I recently read the National Organization for Changing Men’s statement on child custody, and the position taken that, in general, sole custody by the previously most involved parent is preferable to joint custody. I would like to elaborate on this position for families where there has been violence between parents (i.e. woman-abuse). The following includes the main points of a deposition I was asked to provide to a lawyer for the mother in a child custody case. I do not believe this is the last or best word on the subject, {{now THAT’s a rare humility in the field!}} but I hope that it will s(t)imulate useful dialogue** about the effects on children of wife-abuse and the treatment of wife-abusers. I also wish to further discussion on the issue of how we are going to truly end men’s violence. *** Clearly, I believe that the treatment of wife-abusers should not only be held accountable to the partner victim/survivors, but also to the children, and to the next generation.

**{{WAS THAT A FREUDIAN SLIP IN THE ORIGINAL?? “simulate” for “stimulate”??}} . . .

***

I’ve noticed that the professionals are more likely to have the “social transformation” goal, while typically women leaving abuse, and specifically MOTHERS leaving abuse, have a more short-term goal, namely LEAVING abuse and providing safety and good things, including good values, safety, education and role models — for their CHILDREN. This is a significant difference, and with different goals come different means to reach that goal. Moreover, as women leaving abuse, we have a ZERO tolerance for situations that might lead to, well, death. Women have been killed around visitation centers, which is a dirty little secret. Another one is that some supervisors are themselves abusive, or “on the take” and so forth. Again, the professionals have spoken to this issue — but not changed it. (For more info see nafcj.net). Are all? No. But why even risk it?

WHY place both children and the nonabusive parent at any sort of risk whatsoever, for any reason? For one, good grief, what about PTSD? A child has witnessed abuse or been abused. Therefore, expose them to the abuser. REGULARLY, and in a performance situation. A mother has been abused or her child. Therefore, force her — and/or her children — to see their father, regularly and in front of others who will “judge.” AND they do (see “Karen Oehme”). The model lacks integrity, to my mind. No matter, it has government backing, and LOTS of it.

SO this post is a “blast from the past.” I’ve read the literature a LOT, I assure you; you don’t hear this person’s name a lot. Too much common sense. And yet he is in the marriage field, and attaches a Bibliography like anyone else:

Kendall Segel-Evans, M.A. Marriage, Family and Child Counselor 4/15/1989

He recommends not taking chances. Such types of recommendations are not the stuff publication, conferences, and promotions are made out of. No new building needs be built for this recommendation. It’s just too dang sensible.

Reminds me of Jack Straton’s similar work, a while back, here below:

1992

What About the Kids? Custody and Visitation Decisions in Families with a History of Violence

National Training Project of the Duluth Domestic Abuse Project – Thursday, October 8, 1992, Duluth, Minnesota

from the Journal of the Task Group on Child Custody Issues*

of the National Organization for Men Against Sexism

Volume 5, Number 1, Spring1993 (Fourth Edition, 2001)

c/o University Studies, Portland State University, Portland, OR, 97207-0751

503-725-5844, 503-725-5977 (FAX) , straton@pdx.edu

What is Fair for Children of Abusive Men?

by Jack C. Straton, Ph.D.

{Let’s GetHonest speaking….}} Reviewing this document years, and years after baptism by a dissolution/custody suit cold-shock immersion in to the language and lore of Family Court, resulting in a return to Food Stamps, but no return of my missing children!, but I HAVE (there’s always a silver lining) perhaps returned closer to placing my hope in things eternal more than things local! (I’m talking Jesus Christ for those who don’t catch the reference), I have a different opinion, not on its CONTENTS but on its CONTEXT, as follows, re::

I want to express my deep gratitude to Ellen Pence, Madeline Dupre, Jim Soderberg and the others from the Duluth Domestic Abuse Intervention Project for giving me this opportunity to speak with you. The State of Minnesota should be proud that, quite literally, the world looks to this program for guidance on understanding and ending domestic violence. I also want to acknowledge how much I continually learn from Barbara Hart, of the Pennsylvania Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

I will first critically examine the criterion at the base of all custody laws today “What is in the best interests of the children?” I will the talk about children’s choice in these matters. Then I will examine the actual effects of wife-battering on children, and develop an alternative paradigm for custody based on those effects. From this I will examine the question, “Is it ever appropriate to ever give a batterer custody of a child?” (emphasis mine…)

{{PLEASE PARDON THIS INTERJECTION! This article indeed does that, and convincingly.

LINK: DAIP Grants rec’d 2000-2009 (scroll down to bar chart)

(hint: over $4.5 million)

LINK: Grants rec’d by DAIp Parent organization, “Minnesota Program Development, Inc.“

(hint: Over $25 million, and NOT including some of its sub-groups, which apparently get their own grants, too).

(the bottom half of logo proclaims” home of the duluth Model, Social Change to End violence Against Women”)

)

Visitation Center

The Duluth Family Visitation Center opened in 1989. Our mission is to provide a safe place where children can build and maintain positive relationships with their parents. The Visitation Center offers support for victims of domestic violence and their children as well as supervised visitation, monitored visitation, and monitored exchange services to families affected by domestic violence.

(See the nice picture??)->_>_>_>_>

The Center provides a variety of children’s books, games and videotapes as well as beverages and snacks for children and parents to help provide a comfortable and nurturing environment where parents can work on building and strengthening their relationship with their child which so often is damaged by violence in the home.

The Center also collaborates with many other community agencies and accepts referrals from the courts and social services. {{NOw you understand the BUSINESS model…}} Currently we serve approximately 120 families and conduct over 4000 visits and exchanges per year at minimal cost to families.

And I do mean BUSINESS model:

The database simplifies the logistical work of coordinating a Visitation Center and reduces the time to prepare quarterly reports for funders.

Download sample report here

Purchase the visitation center database ($350.00) by visiting our online catalog

Beyond the pure financial collateral, there is also the professional collateral (prestige) and of course feeding much, much much more personal data into databases for further” research and demonstration” projects on how to — end violence against women.

I question why so few have questioned this model. Probably because of the powers behind it, and because those who have been affected by it are often destitute and experiencing PTSD. BY THE WAY — I HAD HEARD OF THIS AND ASKED FOR IT IN MY CASE, AND WAS FLATLY DENIED because there was no “money” for it. In other words, I, the mother, could not pay for it (already on the record) and he the father (being so far arrears in child support) obviously could not. however, when the father asked for — by refusing to acknowledge the court had ordered something different — ZERO contact, it took less than a few months to give this to him, and only one year (as opposed to the years previous I had sought actively seeking help, as single mother, and while personally having to negotiate my own safety, on a near-weekly basis) to retroactively attribute custody and modify the arrears owed ME as the caretaker of our daughters, and which didn’t come to them while living here — down to insignificant and unenforceable payments. Yet our state receives grants to facilitate access by the noncustodial parent. When I became one, I could not access them, either. go figure.

JACK didn’t recommend this model, although he was apparently asked to speak here. BUT – – His voice, too, has been ignored — MOST chiefly by the Duluth “Domestic Abuse Intervention Project” itself, apparently. This paradigm, I simply didn‘t find it once in operation — ever — anywhere — experientially. Our society simply does not accept this yet. And, FYI, there is a LOT of money in this venue bent on “transformational language” and “therapeutic jurisprudence.” Doing this is considered in many circles “good,” and not surprisingly, because many of our school systems share the same premise, they are “values transformation centers” and succeeding well at this, apparently.

Nor have I found someone who accepts this No-Visitation where there’s been Violence paradigm. (And I talk to Dads, not just Moms, and I research, a LOT, on–line. I have been in circles which don‘t believe women should speak, literally, and I have lived in which men did not confront violence towards “one of their own” by even TELLING the man to stop it! Let alone, intervening themselves in any manner to stop it. Ever since I finally took it upon myself to get someone from outside these circles to indeed stop it, I have been exposed, through the family law venue (and others) to a virtual nonstop “litany” of “just get over it” as if either the lethality risk, the economic abuse, the stalkings, and the implicit threat to escalate were somehow “over” in my case. My experience, lots of it, showed the precise opposite. Any attempt at independence was countered. this got tiring for such a person, and others were found and incited to participate in communal denial, a sort of catharctic self–cleansing ritual, I suppose.

AGAIN, I myself didn’t share this paradigm initially. However, this was because I had been enduring years of this type of threat/intimidation/etc. behavior and attempting — myself — to ‘reason” with this man, after it became clear — and from the OUTSET — that saying “no” or “Stop!” was likely to result in physical assault, or worse, and my friends, there IS a “worse.” Now, I have some perspective: 10 years living with a batterer, 10 years of attempting to separate from one. My perspective has changed, after i watched the reactions of society to my assertion of my right to say NO! and ENOUGH! I gave ENOUGH! in the “let’s negotiate” process, and shouldn’t have ever entered into it or been encouraged to. These were the PRIME working years of an intelligent, responsible, and law-abiding woman and mother. Now, I would like some change to happen. i would like the truth of the situation OUT, and I am taking it (obviously) to the blogosphere, and my local Congressperson, AND up the chain, as are others. The truth of the situation is that this paradigm that Jack and Kendall discuss, was not taken seriously by their colleagues then, nor was it ever likely to be. Like him, I have immense respect for Barbara J. Hart (can anyone say “lethality risk assessment”?) But — today or tomorrow, probably — I am about to post the $$ figures of some of these “helping” groups and ask — where’s the help? Moreover, show us the books! I will show the grants, at least from the sources I have. But what I want to see is expenditures, processes, and evaluation tools. I want to see DOCUMENTED fewer homicides, suicides, infanticides, child-kidnappings, and wasted years in the family law system. And if these are not being documented, then what was all the hub-bub about?

IN this “paradigm” all “fallout” from abuse either didn‘t exist (that‘s the “fantasy world” Straton refers to, I suppose) or was exclusively my responsibility to fix, as the mother. However, when I then sought to address this in my own manner, I was again given marching orders, a drumbeat of 3-word myths, and told to get in line. I didn‘t. Consequently, two adolescent girls were removed from my custody and replaced in the care of the man they grew up witnessing threaten, impoverish, assault, abuse animals, deprive of access to transportation and ffinances that a “normal” family would not do, even when I worked at times, and be subjected to repeated lectures on how to behave – – sometimes even on a stool!.

Therefore, as seemingly re–assuring, or validating as these talks may be, that I refer to today, they are most definitely the “minority opinion” in this field. They show me I am not alone in my perspective at what‘s sensible and what‘s not, but these premises were never moved into practice.

There‘s reasons they were not, and THAT should be the topic of a “responsible citizen” male or female, parent or not, in this country. WHY they were not is a public issue, not a “domestic dispute.” The topic of this issues is not just “where are my children?” but “where are my taxes going? as well as “what kind of leaders is this next generation, if we get that far, going to consist of? children accustomed to trauma, abuse, and participating in the cycle themselves?

I suspect the answer, at this point, MIGHT be “YES” but I am not yet resigned to the fatalistic, fundamentalist “I‘m not of this world” passivity when it comes to social justice. I must speak up!

STRATON, Ph.D., Ct’d…..

In the process, I am going to talk today about the effects of male power and control over children, not about parental power and control. I know that it is popular these days to de-gender family conflict, to talk about “spouse abuse” and “family violence” rather than “wife beating” and “rape.” I know that we want a society in which men nurture children to the same extent that women do.

I know that fathers and mothers should both be capable parents. But if you ask “What about the kids?” I want to give you a serious answer. I cannot seriously entertain the myth that our society really is gender neutral, so to consider “What about the kids?” while pretending such neutrality is to engage in denial and cognitive dissonance. I cannot hope to arrive at an answer that will positively affect reality if my underlying assumptions are based on fantasy.

I would like to say more about the history of these movements (which I am still learning), but readers deserve a break:

Have a nice weekend. Again, I’d rather see a sermon than hear one any day.

While this essay is music (the voice of logic, of common sense truth) to my ears, but it’s not a tune many people like these days. Because it actually addresses the impact of role-modeling and personal responsibility upon the next generation.

There are only two places to really put the responsibility: Either on the INDIVIDUAL (which is actually empowering, it acknowledges choice), or on the “THERAPIST” or “SOCIETY AS COLLECTIVE THERAPIST.” Either/or, my friends.

Benefits of putting the responsibility on the INDIVIDUAL. :: If we are indeed EQUAl and ENDOWED with certain UNALIENABLE RIGHTS, then we are also ENDOWED with certain UNALIENABLE RESPONSIBILITIES as to how we exercise them. This leaves a LOT more government time and resources and study, etc., upon maintenance of DUE PROCESS.

It also removes the excuse for killing people, for assault, for rape, for destruction. There IS no excuse. The question comes of up of what about “war”? My answer is, how is what we are seeing now take place towards women attempting to leave abuse, with children, too, not a real war — not a “virtual” war. When there are casualties, that comprises a REAL war.

Moreover, most wars are about ideas to start with. Sometimes they are about basic human lusts couched in more palatable ideas.

SO, check the dogma it’s vitally important, and it’s vitally important also that “foreigners” — people to whom actually facing abuse, having a life on the line, having lost a child, having had to comfort an abused or traumatized child while in trauma onesself — are not to be setting policy. Moreover, those who set policy are not to do so from a particular chip they have on their shoulder, that every one should carry the burden of relieving. And this happens (You can see my chip on the shoulder” here, obviously, but I’m not recommending the undermining of due process in the courts, and re-defining criminal activity as non-criminal. THAT’s Cognitive Dissonance for sure!

(Well, I’d better back out this post fast. Feedback appreciated! My exit takes place Here: XX.

Anything below was added earlier)

This was written Pre-VAWA and Pre-National Fatherhood Inititative, which one theme of this blog has been showing what these cost, and how they attempt to cancel each other out.

Yesterday, I saw a significant DV initiative that was also receiving thousands under “promoting Responsible fatherhood” as well. Same source, different themes entirely. The fatherhood movement has positioned itself as FIRMLY anti-VAWA and in its writings, and in people responding to its writings, says to clearly. Many of them also position themselves as religious, which is true in the WORST (not best) sense of the word, as I understand it. They identify a common enemy, which is feminism, and feminISTS. The prelude to identifying an enemy is attacking it, and this means people. Typically (not always) “feminists” are, my friends, women, and this is who is often getting severely attacked for separating.

The VAWA movement, it has different characteristics, but I do not believe it started out of man-hating. It started out of hating to see beaten up women, and recognizing this has a true social cost.

Both these movements have “morphed” and are now in the higher stratospheres (translation: best-funded organizations) collaborating. In these collaborations they share many things — primarily the design and structure of FAILING TO INCLUDE THOSE MOST DRASTICALLY AFFECTED IN THE COLLABORATIVE PROCESS, and “SALVATION AS A MARKET NICHE.” (in essence). What else is (not) new in the world!

Perhaps THIS ESSAY, THEN (below) can be a reference point from how far off base is society (specifically, government and nonprofits addressing: Violence Against Women, Responsible Fatherhood, and Healthy Marriages — and failing abysmally in terms of the human toll — on all counts, across the nation. (And, world). Perhaps (though I doubt it) some common sense will “redeem” us from all that debt, with so little dent in the problems the debt is incurred to address….Policies get MORE and more pervasive, self-replicating and intrusive, and still we have things like an 11 year old abducted from a bus stop, held captive in a back yard by a (incidentally, MARRIED couple) – – for 18 years — and being used as a personal sex slave and baby-making machine. In a nice suburb, eh? So much for suburbia and “family-oriented” safe communities.

Police missed an opportunity to rescue Jaycee Lee when they visited her captor’s house in 2006 Photo: REUTERS

Officer Ally Jacobs sat in on a meeting with Mr Garrido and his daughters after he requested permission to distribute leaflets on the Berkeley campus of the University of California.

But her suspicions were aroused by the strange behaviour of the two girls – and led to the eventual release of their mother, Jaycee Lee Dugard, after nearly two decades of captivity.

She said Mr Garrido arrived with the girls, aged 11 and 15, who stared at their father “like God” during the meeting. “They had this weird look in their eyes, like brainwashed zombies,” she said.

She spoke out as police said that Mr Garrido’s home has been searched for evidence of a link to the unsolved murders of several prostitutes in the early 1990s, and as Garrido, 58, and his wife, Nancy, 54, denied charges of kidnapping, rape and false imprisonment in connection with Miss Dugard’s disappearance at their first court appearance.

When Officer Jacobs asked the younger girl about a bruise near her eye, the 11-year-old said it was an inoperable birth defect.

(I NOTE: THIS WAS A FEMALE POLICE OFFICER, AND HER JOB ENTAILS NOTICING THINGS THAT DEAL WITH LIFE AND DEATH, POTENTIALLY. HER JOB ENTAILS NOTICING “ANOMALIES.” THERE WAS FACT-CHECKING IN THIS CASE, AND THE FACTS CHECKED RESULTED IN FREEDOM AND DELIVERANCE, THOUGH AFTER 18 YEARS, FOR 3 WOMEN, JAYCEE’S MOTHER, JAYCEE’S STEPFATHER, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, FOR HER — AND HER CHILDREN.

A NICE, MARRIED COUPLE . . . . HAD MR. GARRIDO HAD THE SAME CRIMINAL BACKGROUND, AND ACTUALLY BEEN JAYCEE’S FATHER, IN MY EXPERIENCE, HIS KIDNAPPING WOULD HAVE BEEN OVERLOOKED, AND HIS EX-WIFE SEEKING TO SEE HER DAUGHTER BEEN TOLD (as I was) TO JUST GET ALONG WITH IT, OR GIVE IT UP, NO CONTACT WITH YOUR DAUGHTER BECAUSE YOU JUST CAN’T GET ALONG WITH THIS PARENT. CASE IN POINT: WE WERE GIVEN A COURT ORDER THAT EXPOSED US TO CONTINUAL ACCESS AND ABUSE BY A MAN THAT MY DAUGHTERS HAD WITNESSED ASSAULT THEIR MOTHER. EVENTUALLY, A DRASTIC (and criminal) EVENT HAPPENED on an overnight.

TODAYS’ POSTED ARTICLE, 20 YEARS OLD, QUESTIONS THE POLICY ~ ~ REALLY, THE DOGMA ~ ~ THAT WOULD EVER, EVEN ONCE! ~ ~ALLOW SUCH THINGS TO TAKE PLACE. U.S.A. . . . . .

OR – – – OR – – – – THINGS LIKE THIS ONE, A MISSING FOSTER CHILD TURNED INTO A HOMICIDE VISITATION. AGAIN, HAPPENED IN A VERY YUPPIE NEIGHBORHOOD, ALSO NEAR BERKELEY, CALIFORNIA.

HASSANI CAMPBELL (see my recent post on ‘AMBER ALERTS’ for more photos)

Foster Parents Arrested Over Missing Boy

AP

OAKLAND, Calif. (Aug. 28) – The foster parents who held vigils pleading for the safe return of a missing 5-year-old boy with cerebral palsy have been arrested on suspicion of murder, Oakland police said Friday.

Louis Ross and Jennifer Campbell, who is the boy’s aunt, were being questioned by investigators in the case of Hasanni Campbell, who disappeared on Aug. 10 after Ross said he briefly left the boy outside his car in the parking lot of an upscale Oakland neighborhood shoe store where Campbell works.

REGARDING “THERAPY” FOR BATTERERS:

I think Lundy Bancroft says it well — there are certain indicators that one is wasting one’s time. I’ve read them, and you can too, HERE: I am not quoting Mr. Bancroft because he’s an expert, but because i already experienced what he gave voice to. I had no idea who the author was in picking up the book.

While I am thankful for Mr. Bancroft’s insight and observations (and have featured it elsewhere on this blog), I think that the failure to look OUTSIDE the family court system and INTO the funding behind it, which consists of a powerful government grants system, underwritten in some cases by conflicting actual laws (I refer to “supervised visitation” vs. “Access visitation” premises, which are BOTH funded — in a huge way — and which DIRECTLY oppose each other in fundamental premises, creating chaos — not just “disorder” — but literal “CHAOS” in the courts. Why? Because what’s fought over is power, control, and money. I do not, therefore, agree that training to eradicate deeply held prejudices or myths — when applied to JUDICIAL professionals (court-related) any more than when applied to batterers — is a critical solution. I believe that we should pull the plug on the profit system, which it clearly (my research shows) is. That said, in about 2003, had his not book been there (and this above book) for a point of reference WRITTEN BY A MAN for me emotionally, as I exited another life-changing and mind-numbing session with a mediator, I might be a different woman today.

Women, and mothers, do indeed have instincts. I believe these are God-given, and they are protection-related. Moreover, as a DV survivor, and beyond that, professionally a teacher and musician, it has been my job to pay attention to group dynamics in relationship to a standard! The accuracy of my instincts, and speaking up about them, has been ignored in the courtroom. This told me something about family courts, when I accurately predicted a child-snatch, and was shouted down in advance AND afterwards about the same matter.

Two Female Officers (above) accurately noticed, reported — and because they were cops, apparently, and because this was NOT a family law venue, they were not a litigating parent — they were HEARD and lives were saved.

In the Jaycee Dugard case (above), I heard on TV that a woman (neighbor) HAD called 911, saying this man was psychotic, she was very disturbed. Was her call not heard because she was female? I watched Sheriff Rupf apologize on TV that their county law enforcement had “missed it” in this case.

Our current administration has a lot of TALK, but very little RESPECT for mothers in general. Our pro-active protective and active involvement in our children’s lives is viewed with suspicion after separating from their father in particular after marriage. . . . The fact is, I believe, our involvement is a perceived threat to a child-care-based, employee-driven, dependent-family-substrate economy. (which is not today’s topic).

These instincts are not in operation all the time, and along with Phyllis Chesler (Dr.), I acknowledge fully “Woman’s Inhumanity to Woman” exists, and is horrific. And some men (I have known them) notice more than some women. This is also called “CARING.” Such men are also sometimes castigated as “feminine” by fellow-men, and deal with this in whatever manner they choose to.

However, I take a look at who are some of the most vehement women I personally have had to deal with (not including certain judges, whose behavior cannot be logically accounted for somewhere other than financial reward, which I WILL be finding one of these days, and I am not the only person who has had this happen, same judges), I can see where either their childhood was severely messed up, OR, they never got to have children themselves. Some key component of the logic system (the part that doesn’t acknowledge court orders!) is out of commission, and when confronted on this, reacts in a retaliatory manner as if the threat were personal, when the statement was, I want court orders respected! I have already demonstrated the ability to respect court orders I don’t agree with, for years, but the double standard has been devastating to our family.

The other category which comes into play is “second wife” syndrome. While there are I’m sure (and I’d love to be one, some day!) healthy second wife scenarios, all too often a batterer will go specifically SEEK a woman in order to extract the children from the first wife, when he couldn’t otherwise. That 2nd woman lends a seeming credibility, and yet, sometimes these women can be more vicious than the men they married to start with. An abusive man is not going to pick a second woman who is likely to confront him on his abuse!!

WELL, this post is now over-worked, but I wanted to include the Jaycee and Hassani case above, to make a few points. It also has helped me get past another few hours in a day in which, I have no visual contact with either daughter, as one of them is entering college and the other one is, at this point, alienated, a thing I never inflicted upon her father while they lived here. They have HAD to make some sense of their existing world. Their existing world included a sudden, and COMPLETE elimination from their mother’s input and involvement, without a chance to say goodbye. They were involved in keeping secrets (and induced to) before the event, for over a year, on pretenses of the adults around them. The facts surrounding this event are still not out, and I happen to believe that my absent daughters are not yet aware of what was said on paper about them. I know that they are not exposed to the penalties my family has exacted upon me (subsequent) for continuing to speak up.

This is a HOW -TO for the intergenerational transmission of trauma and abuse. IF the goal is to do this, I am looking at the HOW of it. All that REALLY needs to be sacrificed, in the bottom line analysis, to stop it, is a LOT of pride in high places, and what I call dogma and others call social science, policy, or probability-driven practices (it’s called “evidence” but the actual “evidences” considered are often summaries of “probability.”)

AS TO THE 1989 ARTICLE (BELOW):

I’m not in agreement with his theme that men can be taught not to abuse. I think men mostly respond to what they’re taught in this society — authority, and taking control. Women are taught to negotiate and submit, overall (I didn’t realize HOW much til confronting others after leaving my own violent marriage, and then, in shock, realizing it was expected I should take orders. I said no, and took this to the institutions available (first, the courts) to set boundaries and standards. Then I was in for even a ruder awakening to the state of affairs.

So just consider the fall-out, the social fall out from these things, the canaries in the coal mine. it’s also a good part of the present NATIONAL economic distress and contributing to it, do not kid yourself! Asking Big Brother to coach, teach, punish, reward, analyze, and rationalize the common ethical issues of life — BIG, mistake. This is called farming out thinking to others. In the process, we are paying people to also form our own ethics, when these were formed and stated long ago in the US Declaration of Independence, Constitution and Bill of Rights, PLUS the fact that these stemmed from a refusal to become the colony of a distant king.

Figure it out — the distance these days may not be so geographic as in worlds apart in perspectives. The colonization part still seems to apply. Children are the MOST attractive and fertile field for TOO many people, and they are hurt in this unnatural process, a constant interruption to their lives. I saw this happen to my own, there was a point in time (a certain season, when others saw the personal gain in our divorce and and custody issue) that –because of a badly written visitation schedule — I watched my daughter who, prior to this, had been able to adjust to separation with regular visitation, and retain their personal integrity — they became performers. It was clear that they were collateral in the fight, and I believe knew this too. They talked about it, too. It was unfair to them, and to me as their mother.

SOURCE —

http://members.shaw.ca/pdg/wife_abuse_child_custody_visitation.html

Note: “Last updated Nov. 2008”

(More of my comments below, for once!)

Stop Violence Against Women
A project by The Advocates for Human Rights

Copyright 2003 Minnesota Advocates for Human Rights.
Permission is granted to use this material for non-commercial purposes. Please use proper attribution.

(THESE documents do not appear to have stopped violence against women. I used to read and read from this International Source, but no matter — the people most directly involved with our lives chose NOT to read, or accept, some of these writings. So what good have they done, other than to increase the frustration level, the awareness of the discrepancy between reasonable, and unreasonable? Sometimes, I wonder.

<><><><><>

(Best read in the original HTML, but here:

Wife Abuse and Child Custody and Visitation by the Abuser,

Kendall Segel-Evans, 1989.

Wife Abuse and Child Custody and Visitation by the Abuser

by Kendall Segel-Evans

originally published:
ENDING MEN’S VIOLENCE NEWSLETTER, Fall, 1989

{{Let’s Get Honest has decided to interrupt the article more than to put :}}

MAIN POINTs?:____________________ after each paragraph, in hopes that a thoughtful reader will think about what was just said.

Again, one of the greatest motivations for THINKING about various policies, doctrines, and dogmas, is if something valuable is at stake in the mix. Plus, if one has developed the habit of THINKING with this in mind, throughout — as if not just “someone’s” life or livelihood, but as if “your own” life, or your child’s, were at stake in the matter. THAT is responsible government hood (along with respecting civil rights and due process). COLLECTIVELY, what we all have at stake is to acknowledge that what we may think is “common” sense is nothing of the sort, and that the view gets foggier the less time one spends at street level — and I mean on a regular basis. Dwelling in courtrooms only is NOT “street level” in the sense of, what happens after the court order is written?)

I recently read the National Organization for Changing Men’s statement on child custody, and the position taken that, in general, sole custody by the previously most involved parent is preferable to joint custody. I would like to elaborate on this position for families where there has been violence between parents (i.e. woman-abuse). The following includes the main points of a deposition I was asked to provide to a lawyer for the mother in a child custody case. I do not believe this is the last or best word on the subject, but I hope that it will simulate useful dialogue about the effects on children of wife-abuse and the treatment of wife-abusers. I also wish to further discussion on the issue of how we are going to truly end men’s violence. Clearly, I believe that the treatment of wife-abusers should not only be held accountable to the partner victim/survivors, but also to the children, and to the next generation.

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

I would like to mention that I will speak of husbands and fathers abusing wives and mothers, because that is the most common situation by far, not because the reverse never happens. It also seems to be true that when there is wife to husband violence it is usually in self-defense and usually does not have the same dynamics or effects as wife abuse. I will use the words violence and abuse somewhat interchangeably, because, in my opinion, domestic violence is not just about physical violence. Domestic violence is a pattern of physical, sexual, economic, social and emotional violence, coercion, manipulation and mistreatment or abuse. Physical violence and the threat of such violence is only the part of the pattern that is most visible and makes the other parts of the pattern difficult to defend against. Once violence is used, its threat is never forgotten. Even when the violence is stopped by threat of legal action or by physical separation, the coercion, manipulation and abusiveness continue (Walker and Edwall, 1987).

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

Accompanying this pattern of behaviors are common styles of coping or personality characteristics – such as the tendency to blame others for ones problems and impulsiveness – that most batterers share. Almost every man I have worked with has a tendency to see his partner (or his children) as responsible for his pain when he is upset. This leads to seeing his partner (or his children) as an enemy who must be defeated before he can feel better. This is destructive to emotional health even when it does not lead to overt violence.

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

In my opinion, it would be better, in most cases, for the children of homes where there has been domestic violence not to be in the custody of the abusive parent at all. In many cases it is even advisable that visitation be limited to controlled situations, such as under a therapist’s supervision during a therapy session, unless the batterer has been in batterer’s treatment and demonstrated that he has changed significantly in specific ways. “Merely” observing ones father abuse ones mother is in itself damaging to children. My clinical experience is consistent with the research literature which shows that children who witness their father beat their mother exhibit significantly greater psychological and psychosomatic problems than children from homes without violence (Roy, 1988). Witnessing abuse is more damaging in many ways than actually being abused, and having both happen is very damaging (Goodman and Rosenberg, 1987). Studies show that a high percentage (as high as 55%) of fathers who abuse their wives also abuse their children (Walker and Edwall, 1987). In my experience, if one includes emotional abuses such as being hypercritical, yelling and being cruelly sarcastic, the percentage is much higher. The damage that children suffer is highly variable, with symptoms ranging from aggressive acting out to extreme shyness and withdrawal, or from total school failure to compulsive school performance. The best way to summarize all the symptoms despite their variety is to say that they resemble what children who suffer other trauma exhibit, and could be seen as a version of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (Walker and Edwall, 1987).

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

Equally serious is the long term effect of domestic violence – intergenerational transmission. Children who observe their mothers being beaten are much more likely to be violent to a partner themselves as adults. In one study, men who observed violence towards their mother were three times more likely to be abusive than men who had not observed such violence (Strauss et al., 1980). The more serious the abuse observed, the more likely the men were to repeat it. Being abused also makes children likely to grow up to be violent, and having both happen increases the probability even more.

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

How children learn to repeat the abuse they observe and experience includes many factors. One of the more important is modeling. When they grow up, children act like their parents did, consciously or not, willingly or not. Several of the boys I have worked with have been terribly conflicted about being like their father, of whom they were afraid and ashamed. But they clearly carried parts of their father’s behavior patterns and attitudes with them. Other boys from violent homes idealized their father, and they were more likely than the others to beat their wives when they grew up (Caesar, 1988). Several of the men I have worked with in group have lamented that they told themselves that they would not beat their wives the way their mother was beaten when they were children. But when they became adults, they found themselves doing the same things their father did.

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

One reason for this is that even if the physical abuse stops, if the children still have contact with the batterer, they are influenced by his coping styles and personality problems. As Lenore Walker observes (Walker and Edwall, 1987, p. 138), “There is also reason for concern about children’s cognitive and emotional development when raised by a batterer who has a paranoid-like pattern of projecting his own inadequacy and lack of impulse-control onto others.” Dr. Pagelow agrees, “It may become desirable to avoid prolonged contact between violent fathers and their sons until the men assume control over their own behavior and the examples of ‘manhood’ they are showing to the boys who love them, (Pagelow, 1984, p. 256). If the abusive man has not sought out domestic violence specific treatment for his problem, there is no reason to believe that the underlying pattern of personality and attitudes that supported the abuse in the past have changed. There is every reason to believe it will impact his children.

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

Additionally, in a society where the majority of wife-beatings do not lead to police reports, much less to filings or convictions, it is easy for children to perceive that abusiveness has no negative consequences. (One study, by Dobash and Dobash, found that 98% of violent incidents between spouses were not reported to the police [reported in Pagelow, 1984, p. 437]). Some children, seeing who has the power and guessing what could happen to them if they opposed the power, will side with the abuser in custody situations. Often, children will deny that the abuse ever happened. Unfortunately, the children who side with the abuser, or deny the abuse, are the most likely to be abusive themselves as adults. It is very important that family court not support this by treating a wife-beating father as if he were just as likely to be a good parent as the woman he beat. As Gelles and Strauss point out in their book Intimate Violence (1988), people are violent in part because they believe they can get away with it. Public consequences are important for preventing the intergenerational transmission of violence. Boys, particularly, need to to see that their father’s abusiveness leads to negative, not positive results.

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

Lastly, I would like to point out that joint legal custody is likely to be damaging to children when there has been spousal violence. My experience with my clients is definitely consistent with the research results reported by Judith Wallerstein to the American Orthopsychiatric Association Convention in 1988. The data clearly show that joint custody is significantly inferior to sole custody with one parent when there is parental conflict after the divorce, in terms of the children’s emotional adjustment as well as the mother’s safety. Most batterers continue their abusiveness after the marriage, into the divorced parent relationship, in the form of control, manipulation and harassment over support payments, visitation times, and parenting styles. The children are always aware of these tensions and battles, and sometimes blame the mother for not just giving in and keeping the peace – or for being too submissive. The batterer often puts the children right in the middle, taking advantage of his belief that she will give in to avoid hurting the children. The damage to the children in this kind of situation is worse because it is ongoing, and never is allowed to be resolved or have time to heal.

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

Because I work with batterers, I am sympathetic to the distress they feel at being separated from their children for long periods of time. However, the men who truly cared about their children for the children’s sake, and not for what the children do for their father’s ego, have been willing to do the therapeutic work necessary to change. They have been willing to accept full responsibility for their violent behavior, and however reluctantly, have accepted whatever restrictions on child visitation existed for safety reasons. They have been willing to be in therapy to deal with “their problem.” They have also recognized that they were abused as children themselves, or witnessed their mother being abused, or both, and are willing to support interrupting the intergenerational transmission of violence.

MAIN POINTs?:____________________

Kendall Segel-Evans, M.A. Marriage, Family and Child Counselor 4/15/1989

BIBLIOGRAPHY

Caesar, P. Lynn., “Exposure to Violence in the Families of Origin

Among Wife Abusers and Maritally Violent Men.” Violence and Victims , Vol. 3, No. 1, Spring, 1988.

Davis, Liane V., and Carlson, Bonnie E., “Observation of Spouse Abuse

– What Happens to the Children?” Journal of Interpersonal Violence, Vol. 2, No. 3, September 1987, pp. 278-291, Sage Publications, 1987.

Dutton, Donald., The Domestic Assault of Women, Allyn and Bacon, 1988.

Gelles, Richard J. and Strauss, Murray A., Intimate Violence, Simon and Schuster, 1988.

Goodman, Gail S., and Rosenberg, Mindy, S., “The Child Witness to Family Violence:

Clinical and Legal Considerations. Ch. 7, pp. 47ff. in: Sonkin, Daniel. Ph.d., Domestic Violence on Trial, Springer, 1987.

Pagelow, Mildred Daley, Family Violence, Praeger Publications, 1984.

Roy, Maria., Children in the Crossfire, Health Communications, Inc. 1988.

Roy, Maria., The Abusive Partner, Van Nostrand, 1982.

Sonkin, Daniel. Phd., Domestic Violence on Trial, Springer, 1987.

Strauss, Murray A., et. al., Behind Closed Doors, Anchor Books, 1980.

Walker, Lenore E.A., and Edwall, Glenace E.

“Domestic Violence and Determination of Visitation and Custody in Divorce.”

Ch. 8, pp. 127ff. Sonkin, Daniel. Phd. Domestic Violence on Trial, Springer, 1987.

Wallerstein, Judith., Report to the American Orthopsychiatric Association Convention, 1988.

Some of the above professionals listed here, from what I understand, have either changed their tune, or found more profit in conferences funded by the shared-custody, father’s-rights, premises that women are equally as violent and dangerous as men in marriage. Or, that what is said above, here, about role modeling and responsibility to the NEXT generation, doesn’t apply. I have seen them (I think even Dutton was seen in my last post, at such a conference.). Nevertheless, read what he wrote!

And I can show you, in approximately $millions$$ (as I have been at times in news headlines) the cost of these premises, in particular to the next generation. But what kind of generation IS it that can’t see right/versus wrong, principles of values as defined by what is and is NOT criminal behavior, when they see an age gap. How does gender pre-empt behavior, or youth pre-empt age? Why must women be held to a higher standard of accountability as parents then men, and men be paid — by the U.S. Government through the states through the courts, prisons, child support systems, mediation, supervised visitation, parenting education classes — and AFTER many times a K-12 (or almost 12th in some cases) educational system that itself is a major public expenditure. . . . Moreover, WHY should programs supposedly aimed at low-income people (as if such people had fewer human rights, common sense, or were less entitled to due process and informed consent about what’s happening! than others) are being utilized by sometimes some very well to do individuals in the divorce arena. For example, google the Alanna Krause case. This does not make “sense” to me.

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Speaking personally, the exchanges where were the problems occurred in our case. I asked (for YEARS) for help with this, and got none. Then finally on an overnight, I stopped seeing my daughters again.

I think that had COMMON SENSE PREVAILED long ago, our own family would be much more prosperous, and I doubt life with me would’ve been so stressful for the girls, after all, each weekend was likely to become a scene, or not come a scene. I could scarcely relax much around that. Add into the mix child support issues, and we have a decade of devastation, at least from my point of view.

And WHY? To support some new theories and professions? How about the professions Moms were in beforehand? (Many of us were, FYI).

To support: marriage and family therapists, mediators, custody evaluators, trauma specialists?

When a society either refuses to deal with — OR cannot agree on the source and causes of the ongoing sources of trauma, SOMEONE will have to pay the cost of a traumatized populations, just as any war-torn country, or AIDS-ravaged country, there is collateral damages to go with the death, shock, poverty and collapse of infrastructure. In the United States, this plays out entirely differently, of course, because we still have a significant infrastructure, or at least many of the population believe we do, and those not so badly hurt by it as others wish to, apparently, maintain the myths that it’s sustaining something valid.

And yes, I repeat, those are myths.

Where is the real moral, let alone economic, validity in paying multiple professionals to deal with one recalcitrant, overentitled, or person unwilling to seek help with his REAL problems, rather than to alleviate the symptoms of his REAL problems, such as being separated from his children. I had to face this in marriage, and now with family of origin, and again in the family law system? I find a fundamental flaw, and the truth of the matter, the difference is in worldview of (1) humanity and (2) whether or not law applies to all, or only to some. I.e., the “double-standard” mentality.

And that typically falls on the gender divide. Other times, it falls on the Economic Divide. While it’s common for rich to blame poor for being poor in a matter that an abuser blames his victim, there is wiggle room in both viewpoints, and the institutions we live in and deal with ARE not formed, historically, by poor people. They aren’t. Rather, they tend to impoverish. The familyy law system is GOING to do this. It is going to move wealth around, and afterwards, SOMEONE is going to be impoverished under this theme that it’s not an adversarial system, its’ “really” all about the children.

For child-molesters, this may be true. For those who see $$ when they see custody to one parent or the other, in a sense it might be.

But it’s NOT about the children’s welfare, not like this.

If the individual is unwilling to separate his behavior from himself as a person, after being offered multiple opportunities to do so, and go through equivalent shock of personal changes, as did his victim(s) and bystanders affected, then THAT is the issue.

MOREOVER, if the family system surrounding this individual is ALSO unwilling or unable to confront own criminal behavior, life-threatening and life-changing behavior, in one of its own, what’s that family FOR? that is precisely the family that should be dismantled, yet a system says, no it shouldn’t. (Theoretically, although I know plenty of mothers who can’t see their children under this theory. When the pedal hits the metal, that’s how it plays out, too often).

Voices from the even further past, still valid today:

Too bad we’re more religious than actually a truly God-conscious society — because of the simplicity and beauty with which truths are stated:

“Even a child is known by his doings, whether they be good or whether they be bad.”

“Ye shall know them by their fruits.”

As to who to socialize with, who to take on as business partner or close friends:

“Evil communications (this just means “associations”) corrupt good manner (ethos).”

The book of “Proverbs” (31 in all) was directed to young people, and talks about not associating with an angry man or a furious man “lest you learn his ways.” Family law says, if it’s supervised, it’s OK, and a child must, because it’s his father. Today’s essay talks about that…. Proverbs talks about not meddling with them that are given to sudden change. That’s common sense! Sudden change could be backstabbing, betrayal, turning on you. That habit, done ONCE, is cause to separate if not confronted, admitted, and changed. FAST. We have a RIGHT to be once burnt, twice shy. . . . . . Yet this family law system attracts such characters, accepting hearsay as evidence when it’s not, suppressing evidence when it’s found too often; it keeps the litigation going, and exposing parents and children to a series of sudden shocks, disrupting their entire lives and livelihoods, sometimes everything. We should not have to do this. And Proverbs ALSO talks about not associating with fools: “He that walketh with wise men shall be wise, but a companion of fools shall be ashamed.”

When our children are forced to break these simplicities, for a different ideology, this is in effect using parents, particularly mothers, to produce children for the state. That’s not what we went through nine months for, or labor! No woman goes through this in order to raise a fool, a criminal, or have her kid hurt and taught values that will lead that child to sometimes a lifetime of it. Or to have no coherent set of values but personal survival!

(Note on quoting Bible verses here: I quote them as what’s in my thinking, others may (if they wish) look some of them up on-line at “http://bible.cc” (KJV) or elsewhere. My quotes may not be verbatim.)

What mother would WANT a son or daughter to join a gang of criminals? Yet they do, or sometimes they die for NOT being in a gang. It’s not only the risks, but the values systems.

What about a government gang? What about a system that robs parents of years of productive work based on a theme that someone is somehow to be deciphered psychologically, apart from his or her behaviors? What about a system that would bring ongoing conflict onto growing children — and do so for financial and personal profit — based on the belief that freedom of association does NOT belong to (typically) their mother?

It’s nice to have a lot of professions spring up on how to stop violence against women, I suppose, BUT how about the professions Moms were in beforehand? (Many of us were, FYI). The professionals I most needed in the early 2000 would’ve been a criminal (not family) defense attorney. Then again, where was the funding going to come from?

Mixed Sentiments — from a different battlefield — on the Passing of Senator Ted Kennedy, who valiantly fought: Brain Cancer, for Not Leaving Children Behind, and for Caring for the nation’s Health.

with 2 comments

AUGUST 26, 2009

I rarely sleep, and as the TV flashed with news of this lion of a personality, and carrier of the family name, it coincided unfortunately with the third year since I lost my daughters to felony child-stealing, in retaliation for reporting, in seeking asylum from domestic violence.

I struggle with respecting this event, with discomfort about our nations hyper-respect of public figures. Senator Ted apparently was a womanizer as well as struggled with alcohol, and eventually married a woman 22 years his junior; do his many public accomplishments compensate, is this just the way of “famous men” that change society?

He lost two brothers to assassination, assassinations that affected our country.

I am currently reviewing the work of a young woman, local, that lost a sister and a brother to murder, for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, and probably also wrong color. She too is near the end of her dynasty — both parents gone. Her mother took the loss of two children hard, and also was fighting cancer. Her older sister was seen talking to some people in a van. She was found later, hog-tied, stabbed many times, raped many times, and thrown out like trash in a dumpster. Her SISTER. Her brother was stabbed in the heart for confronting someone trailing other women. Why do I run across people like this? I don’t know, except I don’t live in a castle or gated community, and I find people’s stories interesting. I have been cut out of my own daughters’ stories by a top-heavy, supposedly well-intentioned system that knew that two bright girls were not going to escape its radar or grasp, and that mother must therefore disappear.

Unlike me, she figured out FAST that a system was not going to protect her own two sons, and found a trusted friend to become guardian, so at least she can see them. Like others, for a fee. Like me, she wants some version of the truth to survive for her children.

We are allowed to give birth, but too often, not to also speak.

How famous is Senator Ted, then, and how much more important his story, and his contributions? Should I mourn him more than others? And yet it’s clear he worked hard, campaigned hard, pushed initiatives through, and changed our society. How can I handle this today, when I shouldn’t be blogging but doing something more self-preserving. Do I share the national regret and awe?

Quite honestly, no, but I mean no harm in saying so.

How long can I afford to pause and commemorate?

Probably shouldn’t have today, but i did.

it is easy and common to pick heroes and praise them, and transfer parts of our identity to heroes who gave their lives in service, and forget the non-heroes, some of whom I commemorate below.

I am not sure where Senator Ted falls in this mix. I think the metaphor of this book has come to the rescue. It seems both to symbolize the federalism and the poverty, and the reporting of it that go together in the topic “FAMOUS.”

“Let us Now Praise Famous Men“

The book Let Us Now Praise Famous Men grew out of an assignment the two men accepted in 1936 to produce a magazine article on the conditions among white sharecropper families in the U.S. South. It was the time of U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt‘s “New Deal“ programs designed to help the poorest segments of the society. Agee and Evans spent eight weeks that summer researching their assignment, mainly among three white sharecropping families mired in desperate poverty. They returned with Evans’ portfolio of stark images—of families with gaunt faces, adults and children huddled in bare shacks before dusty yards in the Depression-era nowhere of the deep south—and Agee’s detailed notes.

As he remarks in the book’s preface, the original assignment was to produce a “photographic and verbal record of the daily living and environment of an average white family of tenant farmers.” However, as the Literary Encyclopedia points out, “Agee ultimately conceived of the project as a work of several volumes to be entitled Three Tenant Families,though only the first volume, Let Us Now Praise Famous Men, was ever written.” Agee considered that the larger work, though based in journalism, would be “an independent inquiry into certain normal predicaments of human divinity.“

The resulting single book is a critically praised opus that leapt over the traditional forms and limitations of journalism of the time. By combining factual reportage with passages of literary complexity and poetic beauty, Agee presented a complete picture, an accurate, minutely detailed report of what he had seen coupled with insight into his feelings about the experience and the difficulties of capturing it for a broad audience. In doing so, he created an enduring portrait of a nearly invisible segment of the American population.

My father had a love, and some ear, for poetry, and always claimed he could hear the rhythm of the Lord’s Prayer (or possibly it was the 23rd psalm) in Agee’s “Knoxville, Summer of 1915.” Ever the critic (and unable to carry a tune himself) he tried to talk me out of both music, and Christianity (unsuccessful in both cases), and we had something of a truce. I do not have, emotionally or socially, a family at this point; I have made my own in life, and as to the one with whom I share DNA, it’s the two daughters only (now gone) and the deceased Dad, and my memories of him will have to do. . . .

So perhaps the Agee reference, the federalism, and my wish to point out, that deep poverty and distress still exist, sometimes still caused by either the basic human lusts, or the governmental god-like posturing, will make up for my mixed sense of duty in perhaps failure to “note” with enough awe, the passing of another member of the Kennedy dynasty, regardless of on how wide a screen and with how broad a stroke for how long, he painted his visions of what the United States should be. For one, as a woman, a mother, and a Christian, I do not share his multiple visions on how to help the poor and educate America. I do not think this is the original American vision, a totalitarian welfare state, an inverted pyramid building the 21st century equivalent of pyramids of social structure. I think this “nation/religion” is the way of Egypt, milennia ago. No, I do not. But still, Let us Now Praise Famous Men.

One of the follies of humanity is poor choice of who to praise and with whom to associate — famous preempts worthy.

Throughout the book, Agee and Evans use pseudonyms to obscure the identity of the three tenant farmer families. This convention is retained in the follow-up book And Their Children After Them.

lthough Agee’s and Evans’ work was never published as the intended magazine article, their work has endured in the form in which it finally emerged, a lengthy, highly original book. Agee’s text is part ethnography, part cultural anthropological study, and part novelistic, poetic narrative set in the shacks and fields of Alabama. Evans’ black-and-white photographs, starkly real but also matching the grand poetry of the text, are included as a portfolio, without comment, in the book.

Although at its heart a story of the three families, the Gudgers, Woods, and Ricketts (pseudonyms for the Burroughs, Tengles and Fields) the book is also a meditation on reporting and intrusion, on observing and interfering with subjects, sufficient to occupy any student of anthropology, journalism, or, for that matter, revolution.

THE ACCOMPLISHMENTS OF SENATOR EDWARD M. KENNEDY 1962-2009

August 26, 2009

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Senator Kennedy has authored more than 2,500 bills throughout his career in the United States Senate. Of those bills, several hundred have become Public Law. Attached is a sample of some of those laws, which have made a significant difference in the quality of life for the American people. Download the PDF document of his accomplishments here.

Reflections:

Who old enough does not remember? the assassinations, the plane crash, and now we have newsbroadcasts, and a nation commemorating the legacy of this Senator from Massachusetts. It is healing to commemorate, with respect, men who have changed the face of the nation. Last night, I watched on TV, Charlie Rose seeking to know this man through former friends and writers, and also speaking with the Senator also. As I saw the shock of white hair, the broad, broad charismatic smile, and listened to Senator Kennedy promote Education and Health Care, his two major federal programs and passions, I had a hard time. I heard the Senator talk about how America cannot be left behind in globalization and MUST give EVERY child the capacity to succeed in a global economy.

I thought, where are the memorials for the people who were not born into Kennedy family, but still died?

Viet Nam Memorial

By thee have I run through a troop and leapt over a wall

Psalm 18:

1 I will love thee, O LORD, my strength.

2 The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower.

3 I will call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised: so shall I be saved from mine enemies.

4 The sorrows of death compassed me, and the floods of ungodly men made me afraid.

5 The sorrows of hell compassed me about: the snares of death prevented me.

6 In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried unto my God: he heard my voice out of his temple, and my cry came before him, even into his ears.

. . . .

With the merciful thou wilt shew thyself merciful; with an upright man thou wilt shew thyself upright;

26 With the pure thou wilt shew thyself pure; and with the froward thou wilt shew thyself froward.

27 For thou wilt save the afflicted people; but wilt bring down high looks.

28 For thou wilt light my candle: the LORD my God will enlighten my darkness.

29 For by thee I have run through a troop; and by my God have I leaped over a wall.

30 As for God, his way is perfect: the word of the LORD is tried: he is a buckler to all those that trust in him.

31 For who is God save the LORD? or who is a rock save our God?

32 It is God that girdeth me with strength, and maketh my way perfect.

33 He maketh my feet like hinds’ feet, and setteth me upon my high places.

34 He teacheth my hands to war, so that a bow of steel is broken by mine arms.

35 Thou hast also given me the shield of thy salvation: and thy right hand hath holden me up, and thy gentleness hath made me great.

36 Thou hast enlarged my steps under me, that my feet did not slip

WHO MOURNS THESE?

Deborah Ross (51) and Ersie Charles Everette (58)

2009 Tried to break up, Shot to death at work, in a Tollbooth, and her male friend in a parking lot, ambushed

Cross said the shootings appeared to stem from a domestic dispute as Burris and Deborah Ross, 51, a California Department of Transportation toll booth collector, had recently broken up.

“He clearly had no regard for human life, so we wanted to apprehend him as soon as possible,” Cross said. “We had authorities all throughout Northern California trying to find this guy.”

Burris apparently opened fire with a shotgun shortly before 6 p.m. Tuesday, killing Ross and Ersie Charles Everette, 58, of San Leandro, Calif., who was sitting in his truck in the toll plaza parking lot.

Ross and Burris had shared a house in Richmond, and neighbors said the two had been having financial problems. Richmond Police were called to the house on Saturday, police spokeswoman Sgt. Bisa French said Wednesday. It is unknown what the nature of the call was as no report was taken, French said.

Although their relationship had just ended, Burris was aware of Everette, who drove Ross to work Tuesday, Cross said.

“Somehow, he knew the guy was there at her job, there’s a connection between the two victims, but what that relationship is, we don’t know at this time,” Cross said.

Everette, known as “Chuck” by those who knew him, was a longtime, well-respected bus driver for Golden Gate Transit who had received numerous accolades, spokeswoman Mary Currie said Wednesday.

“He was a likable guy, a good guy,” Currie said. “Passengers liked him. His co-workers liked him.”

Tuesday’s shootings occurred at the bridge over the northern portion of San Francisco Bay that connects well-to-do Marin County with Richmond and other East Bay suburbs. Witnesses said a man used the butt of a shotgun to shatter the window of the No. 3 toll booth, then fired at least three times inside, stunning rush-hour commuters in the westbound lanes before fleeing in the van owned by Western Eagle Shuttle of San Rafael, Calif.

Officers found Ross’ body inside the booth, while Everette was discovered slumped over in a white pickup truck in a nearby parking lot.

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2009/2008 Torres, Catalina (44) & Eustacio (41), Sgt. Paul Starzyk

Brother, Sister, both domestic violence workers, both murdered by an “ex”

According to the San Francisco chronicle, on the evening of July 19th, Eustacio Torres was shot by his ex-girlfriend at a converted garage that Torres was renovating. Torres and his girlfriend, Bernadette Agustin, met about five years ago when Torres was renovating her house. They became partners in that business for a few years. The market started to tumble downhill, and their buildings went into foreclosure causing them to lose money. This caused tension between the couple. After some time, their relationship started to become difficult for both of them. Torres realized that Agustin was dangerous; however he never got a restraining order against her. On the evening on July 19th Agustin went to meet Torres at the garage. Prior to this incident she bought a pistol. She brought shot him with it.

About a year ago Eustacio Torres’ sister, Catalina Torres, a volunteer for a battered women’s group, was shot and killed inside of her Martinez apartment while trying to protect one of her customers in a beauty salon.

Her customer’s husband, Felix Sandoval, entered the beauty salon raged at his wife who had a restraining order against him. Catalina and her customer jetted out of the beauty salon. Sandoval couldn’t find his wife so he followed Torres to her apartment and shot her in the head, simply because she was affiliated with the incident. He then shot at the door and hit Sgt. Paul Starzyk. He still busted in and shot and killed Sandoval.

Since these two murders are a year apart and both victims come from the same family, the Torres family is suffering deeply from these two tragedies.

It is sad, yet ironic how both tragedies happened in the way that they did. They were related and both incidents happened a year apart. Considering the fact that Eustacio, Catalina’s brother had to help bury her, it is sad that he got killed also. They both worked together in a domestic violence group together. Now the Torres family has lost two of their family members to similar incidents.

MARTINEZ — Last September, Catalina Torres’ family struggled to find answers about why she died at the hands of an estranged in-law who also killed a Martinez police sergeant.

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Less than a year later, they find themselves again trying to find clarity after the slaying late last month of her brother, Eustacio Torres, by an estranged girlfriend in San Diego.

According to San Diego police, the bodies of Eustacio Torres, 41, and Bernadette Agustin, 52, were discovered by his nephew — Catalina Torres’ son — in the early-morning hours of July 20 at his home on in the Paradise Hills area. Investigators believe that Agustin shot Eustacio Torres and herself.

Eustacio Torres’ death follows the slaying of his sister Sept. 6, 2008, by Felix Sandoval. Sandoval burst into a Martinez beauty salon looking for his wife. She was not there, and he confronted her cousin, Catalina Torres, at a nearby apartment. While she shielded one of the home’s residents, Sandoval shot and killed her.

Sandoval then shot at police approaching the apartment, mortally wounding Sgt. Paul Starzyk. But Starzyk’s final act was to kill Sandoval, saving the others in the apartment.

Sandoval was in the midst of a divorce from his wife, who had filed a restraining order against him, and Catalina Torres had been supporting her separation from him. In San Diego, Eustacio Torres was severing ties with Agustin. Although the Torres family has experienced two devastating losses, Noe Torres, youngest of the six siblings, said they do not feel like victims.

A memorial fund has been established in Eustacio Torres’ name. Donations can be made at any Wells Fargo Bank branch to the account number 2629533015.

Since these two murders are a year apart and both victims come from the same family, the Torres family is suffering deeply from these two tragedies.
It is sad, yet ironic how both tragedies happened in the way that they did. They were related and both incidents happened a year apart. Considering the fact that Eustacio, Catalina’s brother had to help bury her, it is sad that he got killed also. They both worked together in a domestic violence group together. Now the Torres family has lost two of their family members to similar incidents.

2008 account “Details emerge in Martinez triple shooting:

Catalina Torres survived domestic abuse and became a strong advocate for a nonprofit group that helps victims of domestic violence.

“She was a battered woman who became an advocate,” said Maria Preciado, Torres’ close friend. “She took negative experiences and turned them into positive things.”

In a tragic turn of events, the 44-year-old STAND Against Domestic Violence volunteer lost her life Saturday, an innocent bystander in a deadly domestic disturbance involving her cousin’s estranged husband.

Officers were called to the salon about 11:35 a.m. Saturday on reports of a domestic disturbance. Sandoval broke the salon’s front window with his hand and entered holding a gun, police said. According to witnesses, he was looking for his estranged wife, salon owner Margarita Sandoval.

Martinez police Chief Tom Simonetti said Felix Sandoval, who was waving the gun around, never fired a shot in the salon, but confronted his teenage daughter in the parking lot behind the salon and told her he was going to kill his wife and his other children. Sandoval ran to an upstairs apartment on the opposite side of the parking lot where Torres, an unidentified woman and three of Sandoval’s children were, the chief said.

Elnora Caldwell, 46

She asked for protection

SEPTEMBER 2008, This beautiful woman Tried to Leave, Died, Stabbed, on side of the road

Contra Costa sheriff building death penalty argument in wife stabbing

Investigators said Monday that they are trying to build a death penalty case against an Oakland man who allegedly stabbed his estranged wife near the Caldecott Tunnel and pushed her out of his pickup in front of stunned motorists. Robert Woods, a 47-year-old former maintenance worker for the city of Oakland, was arrested on suspicion of murdering Elnora Caldwell, 46. Caldwellobtained a restraining order against Woods earlier this year, saying she was afraid of him. She was stabbed to death Saturday night and pushed from the pickup on a stretch of Fish Ranch Road that passes over the east end of the Caldecott Tunnel. ..Caldwell’s family members believe she was kidnapped Saturday from her Oakland home, perhaps by someone other than Woods.

Police and witnesses said Woods went to Caldwell’s Oakland apartment and washed up, then turned himself in to an Oakland police officer in the area. More than a dozen motorists stopped to help Caldwell. Some gave her chest compressions and others jotted down the license plate number of the GMC pickup. Alameda County Superior Court records show that Caldwell applied for a domestic violence restraining order against Woods on April 29, and that the order was to be active until 2013.

Caldwell wrote in her application for the restraining order that Woods had shoved her after showing up unannounced at the Nordstrom department store in San Francisco where she worked and accusing her of infidelity. In 2007, she wrote, Woods pulled her hair during an argument in his truck, forcing her to flee and take a taxi home.

In a third incident, Caldwell said, her husband broke a glass sliding door at her apartment.

“It has to stop,” Caldwell wrote of alleged verbal and physical abuse.

Court records show that Woods was fired from his job as a maintenance worker for the city of Oakland last year for allegedly doing drugs and threatening to kill co-workers.

? ? ?

Domestic Violence Murder/Suicides – Here’s a summary:

In the U.S., estimates from the Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS) are that more than three women a day are killed by their intimate partners. Women are killed by intimate partners more often than by another acquaintance of stranger.Most of these murders involved were preceded by physical and psychological abuse.

Outside the domestic realm, males are killed much more often than females; they are killed most often in fights with other men.

According to the FBI’s Uniform Crime Reports, 1,055 women and 287 men were murdered by their intimate partners in 2005. These figures are striking, because in the past, in the 1970s and earlier, the numbers of men and women so victimized were about even. In other words, there has been a significant decline in the numbers of men killed by their partners but not for women.

The number of men who were murdered by intimates dropped by 75% between 1976 and 2005 (BJS). The number of black females murdered in this time has declined but the number of white females murdered has dropped only by 6%. Statistics Canada (1998, 2005), similarly, reveals a sharp decline in the numbers of male domestic homicide victims but not of female victims of homicide.

The reason that women are resorting less to murder of their partners is most likely because many of these women were battered women who felt trapped in a dangerous situation. Today, the presence of violence prevention programming and the availability of shelters are paving the way to other options. The fact that domestic violence services apparently are saving the lives of more men than women is a positive, though unintended consequence of the women’s shelter movement (see van Wormer and Bartollas, 2007).

Nina Reiser (31), mother of 2. No asylum in America

2006, Russian-born Oby/Gyn tries to divorce Hans Reiser (WIKIPEDIA) but disappears on exchange of children

Hans Reiser Admits to Murdering Nina Reiser, Pleads to Reduced …

In 1998, while working in Saint Petersburg, Russia, Hans Reiser reportedly selected from a mail-order bride catalogue,^[9] and subsequently married, Nina Sharanova (Нина Шаранова), a Russian-born and trained obstetrician and gynecologist^[10] who was studying to become an American licensed OB/GYN. Reiser himself stated that he met Nina when he went to a date set up by a Russian dating service; Nina had come along to translate for his date. . . .

In May, Nina Reiser alleged in court filings that her husband had failed to pay 50 percent medical expenses and childcare expenses as ordered by a judge and was in arrears for more than $12,000. ^[13]

Recovery of Nina’s body and sentencing

According to officials, prosecutors agreed to a deal whereby Reiser would reveal the location of his wife’s body in exchange for pleading guilty to second-degree murder. The deal was made with the agreement of Nina’s family, but was subject to final approval by Judge Goodman.^[45]^[46] On Monday, July 7, 2008, Reiser led police to Nina’s body buried in the Oakland hills. Reiser’s attorney, William DuBois, who was handcuffed to Reiser and accompanied by a heavy police guard to the site, said that the remains were found buried on the side of a hill between Redwood Regional Park and the Huckleberry Botanic Regional Preserve, less than half a mile (< 800 m) from the home on Exeter Drive where Reiser lived with his mother, and where Nina Reiser was last seen alive on 3 September 20

Anastasia Melnitchenko, 22, unmarried, No asylum in America

2005 Tried to break up, stalked; a clearly preventable homicide — her body found in car trunk

Body-in-trunk suspect got lots of counseling

‘Doing satisfactorily’ after 6 months of weekly sessions

He was fulfilling that obligation Oct. 19, two days before Melnitchenko disappeared, when he attended a weekly session of a program in Richmond run by Priority Male Center for Positive Peaceful Living

Jaxon Van Derbeken, Chronicle Staff Writer

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

The El Sobrante man charged with murdering a woman he had repeatedly terrorized attended a two-hour counseling session for domestic violence offenders just days before the slaying, authorities said Tuesday.

McAlpin was on probation stemming from eight felony convictions in two separate cases for stalking, threatening and attacking Melnitchenko on several occasions from 2001 to 2004. Part of his sentence in the most recent case was that he attend a yearlong domestic violence prevention program.

THE BEST WAY TO “PREVENT” VIOLENCE IS TO SEND A CLEAR MESSAGE TO GIVE NO QUARTER TO PERPERTRATORS. MCALPIN WAS A COCKY OVERENTITLED YOUNG MAN WITH NO RESPECT FOR THE WOMAN, OR THE LAW — AND FROM THE STORY, IT’S CLEAR WHY HE HAD NO REASON TO RESPECT THE LAW, TOO. I DNR BUT I SUSPECT HE WAS WHITE. I DON’T THINK THIS POOR WOMAN EVER EVEN LIVED WITH HIM. THEY DATED BRIEFLY. SHE DIED. THE STORY OF HER DEATH INTERSECTS WITH THE STORY OF A JUDGE WITH A MISSION; I MAY TELL IT ANOTHER TIME. THIS EVENT INTERSECTS WITH MY ATTEMPTS TO GET HELP IN 2005, THE SAME YEAR. I REMEMBER TRYING TO TELL MY FAMILY THAT THIS STALKING, THESE INDICATORS, SPELLED TROUBLE! MY PROBLEM WAS WHO I TOLD, WHO I SOUGHT HELP FROM, AS WAS ANASTASIA’S.

Taking matters into their own hand; two brothers kill widow & her relatives:

**Winta Mehari, 28; her brother Yonas Mehari, 17;**

and their mother, 50-year-old Regbe Bahrengasi

Widow and HER relatives killed in revenge, seeking money, by deceased husband’s relatives. 2 year old involved.

2006 – No Asylum for Eritrean Family from revenge, greed,

extortion? in the Golden State

Planned to exterminate family during Thanksgiving Dinner?

ALAMEDA — A dispute over money was the cause of the shooting deaths of three members of an Eritrean family in Oakland on Thanksgiving Day, a relative of the victims alleged Tuesday after the suspects in the case were arraigned on charges that could bring them the death penalty.

Asmeron Gebreselassie, 43, the suspected gunman, and 39-year-old Tewodros Gebreselassie were each charged Tuesday with three counts of murder; one count of attempted murder for the non-fatal shooting of Yehtram Mehari, the brother of Winta and Yonas; one count of kidnapping for allegedly taking Winta Mehari’s 2-year-old son from the scene; and two counts of false imprisonment involving two other family members, Angersom Mehari and Merhawi Mehari.

They also were charged with two special circumstances murder allegations that could earn them the death penalty: multiple murder and murder during the course of a kidnapping.

The victims and the defendants were all members of Oakland’s sizable Eritrean community. About 50 members of that community, many dressed in traditional Eritrean clothing, packed Tuesday’s court hearing.

Oakland police say they think the motive for the shooting at the Keller Plaza apartment complex at 5301 Telegraph Ave. in Oakland about 3 p.m. on Thanksgiving was that the Gebreselassie brothers wanted revenge for the death of their brother, Abraham Tewolde, 42, on March 1.

Police said Abraham Tewolde’s cause of death was undetermined and his brothers were suspicious of Winta Mehari, his widow.

Keflezighi said Tewolde died of natural causes but Tewolde’s family members asked Mehari’s family members to give them money.

I REMEMBER THIS ONE. I WAS DRIVING TO EAT DINNER, TAKEN CHARITABLY IN, NOT WITH MY DAUGHTERS, BECAUSE THEY’D ALREADY BEEN TAKEN, COMPLICIT WITH MY OWN FAMILY AND AROUND MONEY ISSUES ALSO. I RAN INTO POLICE CARS & TV CAMERAS BLOCKING THE WAY.

Was this misogyny? Was this something like an honor killing? What WAS this? A young man, apparently a good one, was killed, victim to two men seeking revenge on his mother. His crime? Being a brother, apparently!

Meanwhile, students and teachers at Berkeley High School were mourning the death of Yonas Mehari. The boys varsity soccer team, which he played on, wore black armbands in his honor and dedicated its season to him Monday night.

All the victims and suspects were immigrants from Eritrea, and the killings have shocked the East Bay’s tightly-knit community from that small East African nation. Many people packed the courtroom today, and others without seats waited in the hallway.

Hundreds of mourners have been visiting the apartment complex, home to a large number of Eritreans and Ethiopians, to pay their respects. Many have also brought food for the family and donated money for transporting the three bodies to Eritrea for burial, for medical bills for others injured in the attack and for care of Winta’s Mehari’s son.

Police said the brothers, who also live in the apartment complex, were angry at Winta Mehari over the unexplained death of their brother, Abraham Tewolde, 42, who was her husband. A mechanic who ran a small auto shop on Broadway, Tewolde collapsed and died March 1. An autopsy was unable to determine the cause of his death, coroner’s officials said.

Police said the Gebreselassie brothers suspected Winta Mehari had some role in her husband’s death. Tewodros Gebreselassie, an engineer, attended the party at the Mehari’s third-floor apartment on Thanksgiving, and police said he admitted to helping his brother plan the attack.

Witnesses told police that Tewodros Gebreselassie was talking on his cell phone and said, “Yeah, they’re all here,” according to court records. Minutes later he opened the apartment door for Asmeron Gebreselassie, who then opened fire on the Mehari family. When the shooting started, Tewodros Gebreselassie grabbed his 2-year-old nephew, Winta Mehari’s son, and carried him back to the second-floor apartment where the Gebreselassie lived, witnesses said.

Asmeron Gebreselassie also shot his brother-in-law Yehtram Mehari in the foot, witnesses told police. Another brother, Angersom Mehari, jumped out a window and suffered a broken back. A third brother, Merhawi Mehari, hid in the closet and avoided injury.

Police found the boy unharmed after the two brothers surrendered to a SWAT team following a brief standoff at their apartment. The guns he allegedly used were later found, police said.

At Berkeley High School, students, teachers and counselors spent Monday and today remembering the 17-year-old Yonas Mehari, who played soccer, ran cross country and helped tutor other students.

“I’ve known him for four years, and I really saw him as a leader, an independent thinker and just a really sweet kid to be around,” said Kristin Glenchur, athletic director at Berkeley High. “He was always around volunteering for something” such as working the scoreboards during football games or the concession stands, she said.

His slain mother was active in the Eritrean Orthodox Church in Oakland and was popular among her immigrant community, estimated by the Eritrean consulate in Oakland at to be about 3,000 people.

Donations to the Mehari Family Fund can be deposited at any Bank of America branch under account number 0560942210.

SUMMARY:

Sometimes there is no refuge from family violence — members take the law into their own hands; oftentimes greed is a factor, as in many cases above. McAlpin appears to have just been a man with a mission intersecting with a system with a different mission. She got cross in the cross-fire of attempts to reform a man after: kidnapping, stalking, assault, and threats to kill.

How IMPORTANT is it that the United States set the standard that misogyny is “anathema” it’s unacceptable?

I fear that Senator Ted, Presidents Bush, Clinton, and now Obama, have failed to do this. Moreover, women’s groups also, subject to the same human emotions, claw and fight each other sometimes to the top, seeking scarce prestige, or abundant federal funds. This is also a spinoff of misogyny. We who watch such things don’t see such huge, huge divides among the men’s groups. We have now an older Republican white President, a young and charming (and philandering) white President, and an even younger and MORE charming African-American President, all united in fixing the crises of fatherlessness, and making sure that mothers don’t actually get to (safely) fulfil their motherhood unless a man is present, and it’s CLEAR we do not have have equal protection or rights under law, despite the claims to the contrary. If so, where are all the dead men on the side of the road simply for leaving? Where are the women blowing away a few family generations to take the law into their own hands? They just aren’t there!

I should be more respectful, and I will take another day to be so, of the passing of a major political figure this week, Senator Ted Kennedy.

I wish I did not have a troubling memory of his womanizing, of the two programs he promoted the mOST (education/health) which have negatively affected my family the MOST. I wish that the date of his passing did not coincide with the date my kids were stolen, yet remain within (at last sighting) driving distance, but inaccessible to me, because I simply took a stand against misogyny and violence.

I took a stand for telling the truth in court, and not mincing words. Perhaps I am very disrespectful.

I wish I were not thinking of how he endorsed our current President, for whom I too voted, not being fully aware of his stance on the ubiquitous and impoverishing, endangering to women “fatherhood” movement. It is never enough, never enough — always another initiative, another grant, through churches, through family members when they are themselves swept up and confronted by their failure to confront, and through family law system, and through an unbelievably condescending virtual caste system by the elite making it near impossible for less fortunate to escape the economic abuse that would enable them to escape threats of injury, death, having children abducted, either by the ex or through the courts or (case in point) both, and through violence to our civil rights within this nation.

They said Sen. Kennedy worked like a dog, and i believe it. Some of us do, too, on a single issue that doesn’t often go away. I never tried to raise his offspring, and I do not appreciate his or any other administration , or their programs, just because they have the platform, prating on about how to raise mine, married or single, through a burdensome system that doesn’t even impart decent values, let alone decent academics. And in 20 years of THIS battle, I’ve never had a hand laid on any of mine, anything that was mine, or on ME, from someone who openly said he or she hated me or wanted to hurt me.

It was always from the “helpers” and those “concerned.” Sure. . . .

But in re:

Kennedy’s Battle With Cancer Lost

U.S. has lost a great statesman, obviously. But before this, long before this, we have lost something else. We have lost self-respect as individuals, and transferred it to our leaders, HOPING in them. This is misplaced hope too often, and it’s unwise.

Jeremiah was a prophet who watched and spoke out against the deterioration of his nation: For this, he got left in a pit without water, and would’ve starved there, were he not later rescued. Later, Jesus Christ, also preaching “repent” got crucified.

Jeremiah 17

.

5 Thus saith the LORD: Cursed is the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the LORD.

6 For he shall be like the heath in the desert, and shall not see when good cometh; but shall inhabit the parched places in the wilderness, a salt land and not inhabited.

7 Blessed is the man that trusteth in the LORD, and whose hope the LORD is.

8 For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that spreadeth out his roots by the river, and shall not fear when heat cometh, but his leaf shall be green; and shall not be careful in the year of drought, neither shall cease from yielding fruit.

9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and it is desperately sick: who can know it?

10 I the LORD search the heart, I try the reins, even to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his doings.

11 As the partridge that gathereth young which she hath not brought forth, so is he that getteth riches, and not by right; in the midst of his days they shall leave him, and at his end he shall be a fool.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

For the past 20 years, I have sought refuge in my home, from my home, from my family’s close resonance to the tune my ex-husband played. I have a logical mind, and mind seeks logic to piece a life together, even if the logic is to accept chaos. But I HAVE found a logic to the, what I will call, narcissistic, self-referential habit of federal domination of the markets — well MOST markets. Education, family design, health care, welfare, child-bearing practically, and reform.

The U.S. is succeeding at incarceration — we are the world’s LARGEST jailor — and failing at education. The reason we are failing at education is because we have trusted our leaders to design a system. Instead, they designed an ECONOMY to support themselves, and placed our children at its mercy. This was a transformational system of values sold as good, but not in practice good. It is possible to succeed very well in this educational system and be an utter failure as a person. It is also possible to fail in this system and be a business success. Or to fail all round.

I am 50-plus. At this age, I had to pick WHAT to dedicate what’s left of my life to; and it was a hard choice between Family Law system and Educational System. Both systems hurt my kids and my family, and are creating the tiered society, while claiming to provide the opposite. I have a relative with her own children run through a private school system that took offence that i too — in a different way — opted out of the local public schools. In truth, I believe that if our daughters succeeded without wealth at what she’d sacrificed to become wealthy and with wealth BUY, it would somehow show up her life plan. Our respective nieces might be competing for similar college slots – – I don’t know.

But I have watched close up, and then system-wide, forced failure and social exclusion for simply doing something about it. So have many fellow-blogger mothers (see right column).

Look at this graphic:

(it’s an old one) from “America, What Went Wrong“? An book that documents the destruction of the middle class.

An INDEPENDENT middle class, with time to think, and understanding basic business principles, will hold its government accountable. A DEPENDENT (upon professional jobs, many of them government-sanctioned or supplied), which my generation came from (but not my parents) will indeed do the dirty work and bidding of the top group, keeping the heirarchy in place.

From 1990 to 2009, I have been overexposed to impoverishment, and how it’s manufactured. I watched my husband do this, in order to keep himself on top, he was willing that the ship should go down. Nothing more mattered, and all discussions were moot (or off) that didn’t first establish this dominance. Neither I nor our children were actually to show up as people, or with needs, but as performers.

Now, according to the myths taught in public school (and elsewhere) about HOW government works (which dealing with in-home abuse didn’t really leave time for an official study of), it should be possible to leave the situation. No one should care HOW I leave it, so long as it’s done legally and without harm to our children. However once we showed up as a household, without a resident male, in waltzed the “experts,” ignoring the facts, the danger, the track record, and proudly proclaiming situations that didn’t exist as though they did.

Having some exposure to the Bible and its language, this was easy to detect as playing “god.” And naturally, I protested.

And so, the divide and conquer of the middle class, overeducated fools (lots of academia, insufficient truly hard times), scrabbling to assert their intellectual dominance and right to explain away that violence happened in their family, and they, too, failed to report.

In the long run, I chalk it up to basic human emotions of (1) pride (2) fear (3) greed (4) prejudice (THIs kind, “misogyny.”) Where logic fails, dominance by gender — or age (it keeps flipping around, the varieties of messages I get), only a few years — or marital status, or SOMETHING to preserve the us/them, Object/subject relationship which is not a human relationship. Because surely they didn’t misdiagnose a situation, the judges were wrong, I was wrong, the statistics were wrong, everyone else was wrong, and this intact family unit (sort of) was “right.” Or else. . . . . Social shunning was tried, and I didn’t repent, to the antes were upped, and my kids were stolen, and all contact cut off.

Perhaps it is because of working so hard on these issues, I have been watching politics from afar.

Perhaps it is because of these issues, I have a different “take” on the passing of a Senator that was compared last night to Daniel Webster and Henry Clay. The words “dynasty” may apply, but these are NOT words coherent with the U.S. Constitution and Bill of Rights.

Here’s a woman talking sense:

In THE SHOCK DOCTRINE, Naomi Klein explodes the myth that the global free market triumphed democratically. Exposing the thinking, the money trail and the puppet strings behind the world-changing crises and wars of the last four decades, The Shock Doctrine is the gripping story of how America’s “free market” policies have come to dominate the world– through the exploitation of disaster-shocked people and countries.

At the most chaotic juncture in Iraq’s civil war, a new law is unveiled that would allow Shell and BP to claim the country’s vast oil reserves…. Immediately following September 11, the Bush Administration quietly out-sources the running of the “War on Terror” to Halliburton and Blackwater…. After a tsunami wipes out the coasts of Southeast Asia, the pristine beaches are auctioned off to tourist resorts…. New Orleans’s residents, scattered from Hurricane Katrina, discover that their public housing, hospitals and schools will never be reopened…. These events are examples of “the shock doctrine”: using the public’s disorientation following massive collective shocks – wars, terrorist attacks, or natural disasters — to achieve control by imposing economic shock therapy. Sometimes, when the first two shocks don’t succeed in wiping out resistance, a third shock is employed: the electrode in the prison cell or the Taser gun on the streets.

This is the theme of the National Fatherhood Initiative, there is a “crisis in fatherlessness.” I have watched these manufactured crises on a personal level and also a national level and have begun to get an understanding of some of the causes and sources, ONE of which is most definitely the educational system. Divide and conquer, and assume control of assets and assessments. That’s elementary. One very empowering activity, to young people, is the arts, and self-sufficiency. No problem. Delete the arts, if possible, and free time, and uninterrupted quantities of time for reflection, and also do not study (honestly) either history or the economic system, in particular not the history of any system one is currently in. Again, I saw this in my marriage, how the most basic amenities were threatening to my “intimate partner.” THE most threatening one apparently was access to a steady cash flow. If I got this by working, the reserves must be eliminated by his working less, or making the process of getting to/from work more burdensome and timesconsuming. Rooms got trashed or re-arranged while I was out, at class or working or with the kids. There was no stability. Once you get the pattern, it’s only a matter of breaking it. My writing (I was also journaling the abuse) threatened this person. I exported the journals. He exported his behind and friendship to the people into whose care I’d put them. I went and got them back. . . . . But it was too late. They had to be turned, I guess (?).

Here’s another one which speaks to it about “lockdown” of the fortress continents. Care must be taken to incorporate cheap labor:

Fortress continents

The US and Europe are both creating multi-tiered regional strongholds

There is so much in life to be considered, but in considering memorials, again, I keep coming back to scripture:

“Pray for kings and all that are in authority, that we may live a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty.” (I Tim. 2:1).

“It is not good to have respect of persons.” (James).

You know what, with all due respect, it’s not. LIFE is about what you respect, and who you honor: Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, soul, mind and strength, and thy neighbor as thyself.”

There is not to be a tiered respect of people according to how MUCH of this world they’ve changed. We, ALL of us in the U.S., are to respect ourselves, and the founding principles of this country, which then allow us to respect at LEAST our neighbors.

“Love worketh no ill towards his neighbor.”

Sometimes it’s simply in what one does NOT do, that love.

So, below are my unforgiveable (??) thoughts, in respect that a Senator has died, on seeing the extensive television recognition of this man, and hearing about what he had been doing while I was across the country, trying to stay afloat and keep the pilot light lit in my own life, spiritually and physically.

And I have to go about what’s left of this day, seeking funds sufficient for today and build something to tomorrow.

I saw a charming, Robert-Redford smile, and I thought about Chappaquiddick,

about this man’s marriage to a woman 22 years his junior, a 38 year old divorced attorney single mother, and wondered things that were less respectful than appropriate. I thought about the CFDA pie chart I know, where his two most passionate areas: Education and Health — were THE largest and most impoverishing segments of the budget; and the effect of this incredible top-heavy Federal language transformation into a welfare state directing lives of the lowly.

It did not help when I learned that this person was a prime author of the “No Child Left Behind” act and a real pusher of Head Start. Trust the elite to prescribe for the poor every time. It is also quite unfortunate that his death this week commemorates about 3 years fo the “death” of my relationship with my own daughters, and primarily because I REFUSED to accept that poverty resulting from violence should result in becoming a surrogate womb for childless narcissistic relatives convinced that, having not experienced what my daughters and I did, or accepted court rulings already made, that they, TOO, “knew what was best” for three females leaving family violence. When I refused, I was punished by these people, and part of the punishment was declaring what I provided for our daughters, either was irrelevant and did not exist, and what they wished instead, was somehow superior.

The punishment included the gradual deletion of the arts, the dumbing down of my children, the deletion of jobs in my profession (in the arts) because of the need to fight family!, and eventually the criminal removal of children (minors) from my household in order to, ostensibly, “rescue” them somehow, by totally removing all contact with a law abiding, working, intelligent, informed and independent mother. I have had cause and many years to reflect on the benefits and fallbacks of my own, and my ex-spouses public educations amid dysfuncitonal families, mine in a different way from his, and the values that differ.

This gives a totally different perspective on “No Child Left Behind,” when one realizes that the children of those promoting this policies (if such exist) do not always attend public schools, and if they did, they are not in lower-income neighborhoods. To me, the mark of acceptability is, if it’s good enough for YOUR child, then I’ll listen.

I’ll finish with this well-written summary:

MichaelMoore.com Commemoration

August 26th, 2009 2:25 am
Ted Kennedy Dies of Brain Cancer at Age 77

‘Liberal Lion’ of the Senate Led Storied Political Family After Deaths of President John F. Kennedy, Sen. Robert F. Kennedy

ABC News

Aug. 26, 2009 — Sen. Ted Kennedy died shortly before midnight Tuesday at his home in Hyannis Port, Mass., at age 77.

The man known as the “liberal lion of the Senate” had fought a more than year-long battle with brain cancer, and according to his son had lived longer with the disease than his doctors expected him to.

“We’ve lost the irreplaceable center of our family and joyous light in our lives, but the inspiration of his faith, optimism, and perseverance will live on in our hearts forever,” the Kennedy family said in a statement. “He loved this country and devoted his life to serving it.”

Sen. Edward Moore Kennedy, the youngest Kennedy brother who was left to head the family’s political dynasty after his brothers President John F. Kennedy and Sen. Robert F. Kennedy were assassinated.

Kennedy championed health care reform, working wages and equal rights in his storied career. In August, he was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom — the nation’s highest civilian honor — by President Obama. His daughter, Kara Kennedy, accepted the award on his behalf.

Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, known as Ted or Teddy, was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor in May 2008 and underwent a successful brain surgery soon after that. But his health continued to deteriorate, and Kennedy suffered a seizure while attending the luncheon following President Barack Obama’s inauguration.

For Kennedy, the ascension of Obama was an important step toward realizing his goal of health care reform.

At the Democratic National Convention in August 2008, the Massachusetts Democrat promised, “I pledge to you that I will be there next January on the floor of the United States Senate when we begin the great test.”

Sen. Kennedy made good on that pledge, but ultimately lost his battle with cancer.

Kennedy was first elected to the Senate in 1962, at the age of 30, and his tenure there would span four decades.

A hardworking, well-liked politician who became the standard-bearer of his brothers’ liberal causes, his career was clouded by allegations of personal immorality and accusations that his family’s clout helped him avoid the consequences of an accident that left a young woman dead.

But for the younger members of the Kennedy clan, from his own three children to those of his brothers JFK and RFK, Ted Kennedy — once seen as the youngest and least talented in a family of glamorous overachievers — was both a surrogate father and the center of the family.

And certainly it was Ted Kennedy who bore many of the tragedies of the family — the violent deaths of four of his siblings, his son’s battle with cancer, and the death of his nephew John F. Kennedy Jr. in a plane crash.

Kennedy, Youngest Kennedy Brother, Led Political Dynasty in Wake of Tragedy

Edward Moore Kennedy was born in Brookline, Mass., on Feb. 22, 1932, the ninth and youngest child of Joseph P. Kennedy and Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy.

His father, a third-generation Irish-American who became a multimillionaire businessman and served for a time as a U.S. ambassador to Britain, had risen high and was determined that his sons would rise higher still.

Overshadowed by his elder siblings, Teddy, as he was known to family and friends, grew up mostly in the New York City suburb of Bronxville, N.Y., and attended private boarding schools. He was expelled from Harvard during his freshman year after he asked a friend to take an exam for him.

After a two-year stint in the Army, Kennedy returned to earn degrees at Harvard and then the University of Virginia law school. He married Virginia Joan Bennett, known by her middle name, in 1958. The couple would have three children, Kara, Teddy Jr. and Patrick.

By the time he reached adulthood, tragedy had already claimed some of his siblings: eldest brother Joe Jr. was killed in World War II, sister Kathleen died in a plane crash, and another sister, Rosemary, who was mildly retarded, had to be institutionalized following a botched lobotomy.

But then the family hit its pinnacle in 1960, when John F. Kennedy became president.

His brother’s ascension created a political opportunity, and Joe Kennedy decided he should take over JFK’s Senate seat. Ted Kennedy was only 28 at the time — two years short of the required age — so a family friend was found to hold the temporary appointment.

In 1962, Ted Kennedy — backed by his family money and the enthusiasm his name generated among Massachusetts’ Catholics, was elected to the Senate.

The Only One Left

In 1963, President John F. Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas. His brother Robert became the focus of the family’s — and much of the country’s — dreams.

Following the tragedy in Dallas, Robert and Ted Kennedy became closer than they had ever been as children.

“When I was working for Robert Kennedy, there was hardly a day in which the two of them didn’t physically get together, I would say at least three or four times,” said Frank Mankiewicz, who served as an aide to Robert Kennedy. “I mean, if, if Sen. Robert Kennedy wasn’t in his office, and nobody knew where he was, chances are he was seeing Ted about something.”

Five years later, while pursuing the Democratic presidential nomination in 1968 against Lyndon Johnson, Sen. Bobby Kennedy was shot and killed. That left Ted as the only surviving Kennedy son.

“He seriously contemplated getting out of politics after Robert’s death,” said Kennedy biographer Adam Clymer. “He thought, you know, it might just be too much. He might be too obviously the next target and all of that. But he decided to stick it out and as he said on more than one occasion, pick up a fallen standard.”

Kennedy was seen by many as his brothers’ heir, and perhaps he could have won the White House had he stepped into the presidential race then. But he didn’t. And the very next year there occurred a tragedy that would forever block Ted Kennedy’s presidential ambitions.

In July 1969, following a party on Martha’s Vineyard, Kennedy drove off a bridge on the tiny Massachusetts island of Chappaquiddick. The car plunged into the water. Kennedy escaped, but his passenger did not.

Kennedy later said he dived into the water repeatedly in a vain attempt to save Mary Jo Kopechne, one of the “boiler room girls” who had worked on Bobby Kennedy’s campaign. But Kopechne, 28, drowned, still trapped in the car.

Questions arose about how Kennedy had known Kopechne — he denied any “private relationship,” and Kopechne’s parents also insisted there was no relationship — and why he failed to report the accident for about nine hours.

Kennedy pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge of leaving the scene of an accident. He received a two-month suspended sentence and lost his driver’s license for a year, but the political price was higher.

Kennedy was re-elected to the Senate in 1970, but the accident at Chappaquiddick effectively squashed his presidential hopes.

He ran unsuccessfully for the Democratic nomination in 1979 against incumbent President Jimmy Carter.

Once when his daughter Kara, then 19, was passing out campaign leaflets, a man took one and said to her, “You know your father killed a young woman about your age, don’t you?”

Kennedy Curse: Political Power, Personal Tragedy

Sen. Ted Kennedy was not done confronting personal tragedy.

In 1973, 12-year-old Teddy Jr. was diagnosed with bone cancer, and he had to have a leg amputated. Kennedy’s marriage to Joan deteriorated. Some blamed her drinking, others cited his alleged womanizing. The couple divorced in 1981.

In contrast, Kennedy’s career in the Senate continued to flourish.

He supported teachers’ unions, women’s and abortion rights, and health care reform. He sponsored the Family and Medical Leave Act. And he was seen as a stalwart of the Democratic Party, delivering several rousing speeches at conventions.

Former Boston Glober reporter Tom Oliphant, who covered Kennedy’s career in Washington, observed, “It’s not all back slapping and, and personal relationships. I think one of the things that sets Kennedy’s politics apart is his, what I call his dirty little secret. He works like a dog.”

Political analyst Mark Shields said Kennedy’s “concerns were national concerns, but his forum for achieving his ends and changing policy, became the Senate. And he mastered it like nobody else I’ve ever seen.”

But another family incident exposed Kennedy’s vulnerabilities and held him up to public censure.

A nephew, William Kennedy Smith, was accused of raping a woman at the family’s estate in Palm Beach, Fla. The case generated lurid headlines around the world. Kennedy was at the estate at the time of the alleged attack and had been at the bar where Smith met his accuser.

Eyebrows were raised even further when a young woman who had been with Kennedy’s son Patrick that night revealed that she had seen the senator roaming around the house at night, wearing an oxford shirt but no trousers.

Smith was acquitted following a highly sensational trial, but the incident definitely left a dent in Kennedy’s armor. His alleged heavy drinking and womanizing were widely lampooned, and in October 1991 he thought it prudent to be low-key in his opposition to Supreme Court nominee Clarence Thomas, who had been accused of sexually harassing a former subordinate.

Kennedy’s life, both professional and personal, took a turn for the better in 1992.

He married Victoria Reggie, a divorced attorney with two children from a previous marriage, Curran and Caroline. That year Kennedy also supported Bill Clinton, an open admirer of the Kennedy clan.

“Well, sometime during our courtship, I realized that I didn’t want to live the rest of my life without Vicky,” Kennedy said about his wife of nearly 30 years. “And since we have been together, it’s made my life a lot more fulfilling. I think more serene, kind of emotional stability.”

Elected in 1992, President Bill Clinton appointed Kennedy’s sister, Jean Kennedy Smith, ambassador to Ireland. And in 1994, Kennedy had the satisfaction of seeing his son Patrick elected to the House of Representatives from Rhode Island.

But tragedy returned that year.

In May 1994, Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis died of cancer. Kennedy had remained close to his sister-in-law, who once quit her job at a publisher’s after it came out with an unflattering biography of Ted.

Kennedy’s Battle With Cancer Lost

Kennedy had served as a surrogate father for many of his nephews and nieces, but he may have been closest to Jackie’s children, Caroline and John F. Kennedy Jr.

He was horrified when in July 1999, five years after Jackie’s death, John Jr. and his bride of two years, Carolyn Bessette Kennedy, along with her sister Lauren Bessette, were killed when the small plane John was piloting crashed off the Massachusetts island of Martha’s Vineyard.

Sen. Kennedy led the family during the harrowing wait for information as Coast Guard crews searched for the missing plane.

When the bodies were retrieved from the ocean, Kennedy and his two sons went to identify the remains. The senator’s eulogy for his nephew who “had every gift but length of years” and “the wife who became his perfect soul mate” touched grief-stricken Americans.

It was an all-too-familiar sight for those who remember Ted Kennedy mourning the deaths of his brothers John and Robert, and helping the family bear up after the deaths of Robert’s sons David and Michael.

For decades, it was Ted Kennedy who carried the burden and led the way as the patriarch of a family seen as America’s answer to royalty.

With all due respect, we do not need any more royalty in this country. We need to set our sites on something invisible, something written, but something of principle, that unites us. Our leaders need to stick to that, and out of respect to OURSELVES ,we should demand that.

Written by Let's Get Honest|She Looks It Up

August 27, 2009 at 1:49 PM

Only $118,310,126 (last year), in hopes of Healthy Marriages and Responsible Fathers

Set this Press Release to the “SPIN” Cycle:

California Healthy Marriages Coalition Says GM Bankruptcy Could Create More
Than Financial Devastation for Families

SAN DIEGO, June 11 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ -- The GM Bankruptcy is causing six
dealerships around California to be closed. These closures will create more
bad news for California's economy by increasing the already high unemployment
rate of 11 percent, and adding financial stress to the families involved in
these cutbacks. Statistics show that financial strain is one of the leading
causes of divorce and that divorce itself places additional strains on the
economy and on business. This is a distressing cycle for which California's
leading marriage-support organization offers some new reassurance.
{{Just "trust" our press release, statistics show.  Which, or should we say "whose", is
not mentioned..}}
 


{{And HOW did this premiere marriage-support organization (at least according to itself) race 
to the forefront of all California's marriage support organizations??  Clearly 
it must be on its own merits. . . . blood, sweat, tears, ingenuity (that's true), 
and entrepreneurship, standing on the shoulders of giants.  Seriously, the Dept. of Health
and Human Services IS indeed a giant, funding this group from the top down, and some of the
other coalitions under its w - i - d - e umbrella from the bottom up.)






Target Population:
Married and Unmarried persons in California, ages 15 and
older, of all racial, cultural and economic backgrounds


Federal Award Amount:
$2,342,080/year


Program Name:
California Healthy Marriages Coalition


Project Period:
9/30/2006 - 9/29/2011




. . . 
SOURCE  California Healthy Marriages Coalition
 

Yes, alas, ’tis true. . ..  
 
recently, as well as, well,  not so recently, it seems clear from the various newspaper headlines that many marriages are not very healthy.  Also, the same could be said of divorces.      But, for those readers who, as either (U.S.) employees or employERS, actually pay taxes, I would like to reassure you that the U.S. Government is on it, it has a PLAN.  You may or may not be in on the plan, but I assure you it has many plan to fix the overall unhealthiness of both marriages, and the lack of safety attendant to divorce from, well, a spouse that doesn’t believe in divorce.  It would also like to assure you to trust the experts (its hired ones and delegated ones)  To analyze and fix the situation.  This IS, after all, what governments exist for right?  I seem to foggily remember something about the purpose of governments in the Declaration of Independence, and about the word “consent.”     It seems to me that somewhere along the line “We the People” got turned into a version of “You People,” and the posse of experts got called in to fix families.  What they actually ended up doing is breaking the legal system, by turning it into a behavioral health marketplace, clearly infringing on the niche of the faith institutions, for example, I heard that recently the Knights of Columbus, on behalf  of Catholics everywhere, have launched a(nother) fatherhood initiative, lest we somehow forget who’s the boss, called:  http://FathersForGood.org.  
 

 
Notice anything missing from the logo there?
 

(this time, WITH a Mom..)
And now again, this time with a little more style…
 
Now for all those little pieces of education that add up to $118, 310, 126 – – for 2008 — enjoy the panorama of organizations that are addressing this problem of, well, unhealthy marriages and irresponsible fathers.  (I have omitted “Abstinence Education,” because it would overload this post’s, well, capacity).
This wordpress page can only carry one year’s worth of links at a time.  Moreover these are alphabetical by Grant Recipient, nationwide, and not by state (although zip codes are listed).  The fun part is, they are “click-able,” meaning, you can click on an institution’s name and see what else it’s been up to, for how long and for how much.  Perhaps I might show a few more ways to search, but someone of basic intelligence (and motivated) can learn a lot simply by looking.  Another trick you might try is searching its name on “usaspending.gov” and see what kind of cute bar charts and stats show up.  
Thus one can get an overview of almost any CFDA number BUT this one, 93.086, on a certain database.  
Is this inintentional?  If part of required Civic Literacy was understanding the federal grants system, if rather than whine, moan, or complain — or complain to elected representatives –MORE AVERAGE JOES & JANE DOES (the alive ones) started monitoring our home states, state by state and agency by agency, we might stop asking why states are running out of money for domestic violence shelters and general assistance, because the answer would be obvious.  Instead, we would ask intelligent, and pointed questions from the point of view, these are public funds, and (if government) you are public servants, and (if nonprofit) you’re tax exempt for a reason — how does this fulfil the reason, and who is evaluating, and by what standard? 
And then question the standards if they are unreasonable, inconsistent, or do not exist.
Alternately, we could chug along and say, “isn’t so and so handling this? Because I’m busy, and have my own life to handle.”



Sure they are.  That’s why inbetween talking about this, I can’t keep up with the healines, or follow up with the last ones before there are new ones.  That’s why protective orders protect, law enforcement enforces (consistently), child support is collected (consistently and without gender bias), and welfare helps people be better.  AND, (case in point) marriages are clearly getting healed — either that, or they can’t keep up with the new babies (despite Abstinence Education, which I omitted from this list, but is still going strong).
(OK, that’ll have to be another post — WOW, I just pulled 653 records under one code, 93.010 (community-based A.E.)
(not a searchable code in “usaspending.gov,” at least not readily…)
However, top 5 programs with the keyword “abstinence” in the PROJECT title:



93.010: Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)
$128,610,003


 98.001: USAID Foreign Assistance for Programs Overseas
$11,058,644


 93.279: Drug Abuse and Addiction Research Programs
$9,561,182


 93.995: Adolescent Family Life_Demonstration Projects
$8,064,374


 93.273: Alcohol Research Programs
$6,222,97



AND as far as WHO is really interested in why people don’t abstain and trying to get them to:
Top 10 Recipients



 FAMILY HEALTH INTERNATIONAL (FHI)
$3,593,286


 SCRIPPS RESEARCH INSTITUTE
$2,551,682


 PROGRAM FOR APPROPRIATE TECHNOLOGY IN HEALTH
$2,233,162


 HERITAGE COMMUNITY SERVICES INC
$2,000,000


 BROWN UNIVERSITY
$1,672,760


 POPULATION COUNCIL INC
$1,613,000


 PATH
$1,500,000


 NEUROBEHAVIORAL RESEARCH INC
$1,466,239


 NEW HOPE CENTER INC
$1,399,907


 CENTER FOR SELF-SUFFICIENCY, INC.
$1,399,300



Results 1 to 500 of 653 matches.  restricted to “NEW” only, I got 240 new grants:
(AFTER ALL THIS, WILL YOU BE ABLE TO “ABSTAIN” FROM LOOKING FURTHER INTO THESE?)
Here’s a quick partial look:
 



Fiscal Year
Grantee Name
State
Award Title
Budget Year
CFDA Program Name
Award Class
Principal Investigator
($$)Sum of Actions



 
 
 



2009 
Columbus Hospital 
NJ 
COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
2 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
BERNADETTE VISSANI 
$- 739,820 


2009 
METRO ATLANTA YOUTH FOR CHRIST, INC 
GA 
COMMUNITY-BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
3 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
CINDY MILLER 
$ 300,186 


2009 
Saint Michael`s Medical Center, Inc 
NJ 
COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
1 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
BERNADETTE VISSANI 
$ 677,551 


2008 
A WOMAN`S PLACE MINISTRIES, INC. 
FL 
ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
1 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
MICHAEL LAYTON 
$ 600,000 


2008 
A WOMENS CONCERN, INC. 
MA 
HEALTHY FUTURES ABSTINENCE EDUCATION INITIATIVE 
3 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
ELIZABETH SNYDER 
$ 600,000 


2008 
ABSTINENCE & MARRIAGE EDUCATION PARTNERSHIP 
IL 
COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
1 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
SCOTT PHELPS 
$ 512,500 


2008 
ABSTINENCE EDUCATION CONSULTANTS,INC. 
KS 
COMMUNITY-BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
1 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
LOIS THEIS 
$ 600,000 


2008 
ABSTINENCE TIL MARRIAGE EDUCATION 
OH 
COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
3 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
CATHERINE E WOOD 
$ 600,000 


2008 
AIDS RESOURCE CENTER OF WISCONSIN, INC 
WI 
COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
1 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
SCOTT STOKES 
$ 600,000 


2008 
ALPHA CENTER 
SD 
COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
1 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
KIMBERLY MARTINEZ 
$ 600,000 


2008 
ALTERNATIVE COMMUNITY DEVELOPMENT SERVICES 
TX 
COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
1 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
SHARI L CARROLL 
$ 454,922 


2008 
ARIZONA MEXICO BORDER HEALTH FOUNDATION 
AZ 
COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION 
1 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
ALBERT MORENO 
$ 550,000 


2008 
AWARE, INC. 
WA 
WASHINGTON STATE: COMMUNITY-BASED ABSTINENCE UNTIL MARRIAGE PROJECT 
1 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
JAMES N GRENFELL 
$ 499,849 


2008 
About Our Kids, Inc. 
MO 
STRATEGIES FOR ABSTINENCE AND VIRTUE EDUCATION (SAVE) 
2 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
ALICIA HUMES 
$ 600,000 


2008 
Abstinence the Better Choice, Inc. 
OH 
ABSTINENCE THE BETTER CHOICE 
3 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
CHERYL BIDDLE 
$ 600,000 


2008 
Americans for a Better Tomorrow, Inc. 
AZ 
POWER FITNESS ABSTINENCE PROGRAM- TEACHING YOUTH AGES 12 THROUGH 18 THE SOCIAL, PSYCHOLOGI 
3 
Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)  
DISCRETIONARY 
EVA GODDARD 
$ 600,000 



 
 
 
and $427 mil (see above link “still going strong”) for another code 93.235, plain old “A.E.” Then I searched the word “abstinence” as a keyword in the project title, and got 
 
 
 
 
 In these venues, (once under the facuet of grants and publications  –  alittle easier to do while not being stalked, or in a court case onesself) talking (and publishing) about problems pays more than solving them, in fact, a LOT more.   This also provides an incentive to try to keep actual problem-solvers (like those who have observed and been hurt by the system, and been taking names and notes, too) OUT of the  talkfests, or decision making process, if they are heard.  And, more and more, out of being informed that the decisionmaking process is not where it should be — as to legal matters, in the courts, not the psychologists’ offices.  
Solving problems cuts off cash flow.  There’s  a clear disincentive.  Ask someone who’s life, or whose child’s life is at stake (and who has not got a history of perjury in the case file already) and SHE will tell you, safety first, shared parenting second.  Child’s right not to suffer abuse or be threatened (let alone the mother’s) or kidnapped supersedes person with history of threatening or abuse’s right to see the child. In re:  “healthy marriages,” her /their (if children) right not to be hurt or killed, or traumatized in fear of this happening, or expose her children to being abused, and deal with frequent exchanges with a former batterer (even if the children were not directly battered) supersedes 53 professionals’ need to reconsider this.  At what point are professionals to be forced to read these headlines that we read, and sometimes analyze, kind of like sitting through traffic court and watch graphic accident footage after one was caught speeding. 
I have been through this.  I have been IN a court case, same month, and domestic violence murder going on, same city, and one could not tell from the demeanor on the outside.  My case had a history of violence, injury, repeated disregard of laws, and treats to abduct (which in fact had just happened).  No matter, we are in la-la-land again. . . .   I had a PTSD incident in the courtroom.  No matter. . . .   
SO, my hope is that the general public will become generally acquainted with how this works, so that if one of THEIR friends is involved (and, of course this presumes that my readers are interested in justice, not perverting it) (which may or may not be wise) – – they can at least see where things went.  $$ wise.  This year.
 
Experts are being churned out at an alarming rate.  Grants go to this, too.  Grants sometimes drive the field of expertise, and very much so in this field of fatherhood and families.  I have looked, and can say this.  Have you?  Could you rebut that assertion with data from the top universities around the country, and colleges?  (Not unless several programs disappear fast….)
Do yourself and others a favor — become a LITTLE more expert in this today than you were yesterday.
And show someone else.  OK?
 
One philosophical question I have from time to time is how much of our adult lives (let alone growing up) are spent OUTside any government institutions to start with.  I mean, what part of our lives are NOT regulated, measured, examined and evaluated (at our own expense) to drive policiesi (without our informed consent, really) that will further tinker with the dynamics of eat, sleep, breed, marry, divorce, educate (let’s not omit that) and re-educate, regulate, and direct.    I have an unfortunate independent streak, and I tend to think there are often better ways to do things.  As a woman, I don’t think needlessly repetitive tasks are the natural inheritance of my gender biologically, and although sometimes there’s a comfort in them, there should be other ways to do one thing or another.  
 
Like better, or less wasteful.  The benefit is, getting more done.  Take for example, deleting religion from public school systems (supposedly) and then trying to re-inject it after criminal behavior, or during the divorce/separation scenarios.  Take for example, a system that itself stresses and dismantles families, and then another (equally chaotic and burdensome to the general public) system to put them back together again.  Take for example, the talk about “separation of church and state” and then nationally calling upon “faith-based organizations” to, though they are largely tax-exempt, at public expense put them back together again.  To WHOM are any of the organizations below accountable, and what demonstration of effectiveness are they showing, or are the “exempt” from that as well as (those that are) from taxes, too?
 
Anyhow, I give you a single “CFDA” (Category of Federal Domestic Assistance) called “Healthy Marriages Promoting Responsible Fatherhood.”  I guess it is assumed that mothers will be healthy without extra coaching and bribing.  Or, that if you get a responsible father (i.e., buy one, and this is explained through another grants systems as well, this IS indeed the premise in practice here – – one has to look at the child support system’s role in divorce).  . . .     or perhaps this acknowledges that for whatever reasons (let’s not mention any OTHER programs this same Of/By/For the people government might have had its hands in), there is a social crisis not just of “fatherlessness” but of “irresponsible fatherhood.”
 
I can vouch for the one I know — father of my children.  He’d rather fight than work any day, which process eventually put me out of work.  No matter, the government stepped in, through family court matters, enter mediation, exit civil rights, eventually exit my contact with my offspring (they did spring out of me, physically.  I pushed, they sprang. . ..  whatever… I was awake for the process and can verify:  I had two children a very long time ago).  And then out they go, to work their own way through life, lest Dad be humiliated by paying much of his child support arrears, which was partly what the battle was about to start with.  I felt that one of us should work, and offered the alternatives of (1) stop messing with me, so I could (since it doesn’t appear you want to) or (2) pay up.  Version (1) entailed requesting a restraining order renewal, or 2nd one, or  . . . . or . . . .   and version (2) required — and I pursued this through the assigned agency – – court-ordered child support should actually be collected before our daughters became adults.  However the MAIN conversation was not about what’s good for the children, but who gets to give orders — forever, basically.    I categorically disagreed with this philosophy as being anti-Constitutional and anti-civil rights and anti-reasonable.  My right to disagree was disagreed with, which makes the situation a GREAT pickings for the family law venue, it LOVES “high-conflict” situations — this draws federal moneys and justifies many professions.   
Anyhow, here they are:  the helpers, last year (2008):
While not all of these were birthed, or even nurtured, by California Healthy Marriages Coalition (“the coalition of coalitions model.”  Sounds kind of like the “war to end all wars,” I don’t know….), they were perhaps started as a gleam in SOMEONE”s eye, having been informed of what’s available from Big Brother, who, on behalf of us all, will make all those ouchies better, soon, soon . .       When we “consent” to taxes, it’s good to know what we have consented for them to be distributed to, well, do.    For example,   ///
CFDA Number = 93086 Fiscal Year = 2008  Recipient: ACTIVE RELATIONSHIPS CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 75205



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0037
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: AS DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH  Recipient ZIP Code: 96799



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0054
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$450,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$450,000.00



Recipient: AUBURN UNIVERSITY  Recipient ZIP Code: 36849



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0001
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$1,899,487.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,899,487.00



Recipient: AVANCE – AUSTIN CHAPTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 78704



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0063
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$261,825.00


Award Subtotal:
$261,825.00



Recipient: AVANCE – CORPUS CHRISTI CHAPTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 78415



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0071
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: AVANCE – HOUSTON CHAPTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 77092



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0084
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$236,851.00


Award Subtotal:
$236,851.00



Recipient: AVANCE, INC. – EL PASO  Recipient ZIP Code: 79902



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0100
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: Alliance for North Texas Healthy & Effective Marriages  Recipient ZIP Code: 75246



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0072
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$903,425.00


Award Subtotal:
$903,425.00



Recipient: Archuleta County Department of Human Services  Recipient ZIP Code: 81147



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0055
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$200,000.00


2008
90FR0055
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$200,000.00



Recipient: Arizona Youth Partnership  Recipient ZIP Code: 85741



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0136
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: BARAGA-HOUGHTON-KEWEENAW CHILD DEVELOPMENT BOARD, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 49931



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0018
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: BEECH ACRES PARENTING CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 45230



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0100
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


2008
90FE0100
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: BEST FRIENDS FOUNDATION  Recipient ZIP Code: 20015



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0058
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$500,724.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,724.00



Recipient: BETHANY CHRISTIAN SERVICES  Recipient ZIP Code: 49501



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0057
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$500,000.00


2008
90FE0098
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$499,980.00


Award Subtotal:
$999,980.00



Recipient: BETTER FAMILY LIFE, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 63108



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0023
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$1,097,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,097,000.00



Recipient: BILL WILSON CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 95052



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0096
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$243,469.00


Award Subtotal:
$243,469.00



Recipient: BOAT PEOPLE S.O.S. INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 22041



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0032
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$545,806.00


2008
90FR0038
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$795,806.00



Recipient: BOONEVILLE MUNICIPAL SEPERATE SCHOOL DISTRICT  Recipient ZIP Code: 38829



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0036
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$532,675.00


2008
90FE0036
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$532,675.00



Recipient: Brighter Beginnings  Recipient ZIP Code: 94601



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0099
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: CAMBODIAN ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 90806



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0065
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$450,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$450,000.00



Recipient: CATHOLIC CHARITIES  Recipient ZIP Code: 67214



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0112
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$530,368.00


Award Subtotal:
$530,368.00



Recipient: CATHOLIC CHARITIES OF ORANGE COUNTY, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 92705



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0080
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: CECIL COUNTY GOVERNMENT  Recipient ZIP Code: 21921



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0018
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: CENTER FOR SELF-SUFFICIENCY, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 53211



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0013
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$1,096,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,096,000.00



Recipient: CENTERFORCE  Recipient ZIP Code: 94901



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0004
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$481,554.00


Award Subtotal:
$481,554.00



Recipient: CHARACTER COUNTS IN MAINE  Recipient ZIP Code: 04116



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0122
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: CHILD & FAMILY RESOURCES INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 85716



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0059
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: CHILD & FAMILY SERVICES OF NEW HAMPSHIRE  Recipient ZIP Code: 03101



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0077
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$315,830.00


Award Subtotal:
$315,830.00



Recipient: CHILD ABUSE COUNCIL, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 33609



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0052
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: CHILD AND FAMILY RESOURCE COUNCIL  Recipient ZIP Code: 49503



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0038
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


2008
90FE0038
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$1,016,258.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,016,258.00



Recipient: CHILD DEVLOPMENT RESOURCES, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 23127



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0043
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$249,999.00


Award Subtotal:
$249,999.00



Recipient: CHILD, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 78751



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0078
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$511,133.00


Award Subtotal:
$511,133.00



Recipient: CHILDREN’S FRIEND AND SERVICE  Recipient ZIP Code: 02903



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0030
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: CHILDREN`S AID SOCIETY IN CLEARFIELD COUNTY  Recipient ZIP Code: 16830



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0118
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$226,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$226,000.00



Recipient: CHILDREN`S INSTITUTE , INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 90005



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0076
2
ACF
1
 09-25-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0076
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$500,000.00


2008
90FR0088
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$1,000,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,500,000.00



Recipient: CHOANOKE AREA DEVELOPMENT ASSOCIATION, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 27869



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0001
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$245,296.00


Award Subtotal:
$245,296.00



Recipient: CHW DBA CALIFORNIA HOSPITAL MEDICAL CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 90015



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0071
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: CIRCLE OF PARENTS  Recipient ZIP Code: 60611



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0098
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$1,000,000.00


2008
90FR0098
2
ACF
1
 06-06-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,000,000.00



Recipient: CJH Educational Grant Services, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 27620



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0059
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: CO DEPARTMENT OF HUMAN SERVICES  Recipient ZIP Code: 80236



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0085
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$2,000,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$2,000,000.00



Recipient: COLORADO STATE UNIVERSITY  Recipient ZIP Code: 80523



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0028
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$482,687.00


2008
90FE0028
2
ACF
1
 03-18-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$482,687.00



Recipient: COMMUNITY ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT ASSN OF COOK COUNTY  Recipient ZIP Code: 60604



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0089
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$450,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$450,000.00



Recipient: COMMUNITY SERVICES FOR CHILDREN, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 18109



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0033
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$228,603.00


Award Subtotal:
$228,603.00



Recipient: CONFEDERATED SALISH & KOOTENAI TRIBES  Recipient ZIP Code: 59855



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0007
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


2008
90FN0007
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$149,940.00


2008
90FR0006
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$465,494.00


Award Subtotal:
$615,434.00



Recipient: CONFEDERATED TRIBES OF SILETZ  Recipient ZIP Code: 97380



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0009
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$149,918.00


2008
90FN0009
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$149,918.00



Recipient: COOK INLET TRIBAL COUNCIL, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 99508



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0066
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0066
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$418,832.00


Award Subtotal:
$418,832.00



Recipient: CORNERSTONE OF HOPE CHURCH  Recipient ZIP Code: 46221



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0119
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$350,560.00


Award Subtotal:
$350,560.00



Recipient: COUNCIL ON PREVENTION & EDUCATION SUBSTANCES, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 40204



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0007
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$259,532.00


2008
90FR0015
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$499,968.00


Award Subtotal:
$759,500.00



Recipient: CRECIENDOS UNIDOS/GROWING TOGETHER  Recipient ZIP Code: 85006



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0010
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$275,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$275,000.00



Recipient: CT ST DEPARTMENT OF SOCIAL SERVICES  Recipient ZIP Code: 06106



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0031
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$1,000,000.00


2008
90FR0031
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,000,000.00



Recipient: CURATORS OF THE UNIVERSITY OF MISSOURI  Recipient ZIP Code: 65211



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0130
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$499,775.00


Award Subtotal:
$499,775.00



Recipient: CUYAHOGA COUNTY BOARD OF COUNTY COMMISSIONERS  Recipient ZIP Code: 44113



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0052
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$533,730.00


Award Subtotal:
$533,730.00



Recipient: California Healthy Marriages Coalition  Recipient ZIP Code: 92024



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0104
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$2,400,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$2,400,000.00



Recipient: Child Find of America, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 12561



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0020
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: Community Marriage Builders, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 47714



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0034
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$543,303.00


Award Subtotal:
$543,303.00



Recipient: Comprehensive Youth Services of Fresno, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 93726



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0053
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


2008
90FR0053
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: DC DEPARTMENT OF HUMAN SERVICES  Recipient ZIP Code: 20032



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0087
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$2,000,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$2,000,000.00



Recipient: Denver Indian Family Resource Center  Recipient ZIP Code: 80226



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0081
2
ACF
1
 09-26-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0081
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$198,280.00


Award Subtotal:
$198,280.00



Recipient: Detroit Workforce Development Department  Recipient ZIP Code: 48202



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0073
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: EAST CAROLINA UNIVERSITY  Recipient ZIP Code: 27858



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0017
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$525,161.00


Award Subtotal:
$525,161.00



Recipient: EAST LOS ANGELES COMMUNITY UNION  Recipient ZIP Code: 90022



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0056
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$1,100,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,100,000.00



Recipient: EL PASO CENTER FOR CHILDREN  Recipient ZIP Code: 79930



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0088
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: ELIZABETHS NEW LIFE CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 45405



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0035
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$1,859,692.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,859,692.00



Recipient: Employment Opportunity & Training Center of Northeaster  Recipient ZIP Code: 18503



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0060
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$225,608.00


Award Subtotal:
$225,608.00



Recipient: Exchange Club Center for the Prevention of Child Abuse  Recipient ZIP Code: 34981



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0025
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$242,822.00


Award Subtotal:
$242,822.00



Recipient: FAMILY & CHILDREN’S SERVICE, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 74120



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0007
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: FAMILY RESOURCES INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 33733



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0132
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$1,100,000.00


2008
90FE0132
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,100,000.00



Recipient: FIRST A M E CHILD DEVELOPMENT CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 98122



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0032
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: FIRST NATIONS COMMUNITY HEALTHSOURCE  Recipient ZIP Code: 87108



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0061
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$300,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$300,000.00



Recipient: FIRST THINGS FIRST  Recipient ZIP Code: 37405



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0031
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$1,099,953.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,099,953.00



Recipient: FOREST COUNTY POTAWATOMI COMMUNITY  Recipient ZIP Code: 54520



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0006
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


2008
90FN0006
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$150,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$150,000.00



Recipient: FOREST INSTITUTE OF PROFESSIONAL PSYCHOLOGY  Recipient ZIP Code: 65807



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0110
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$940,669.00


Award Subtotal:
$940,669.00



Recipient: FORTUNE SOCIETY, INC (THE)  Recipient ZIP Code: 10011



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0017
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: FOUNDATION FOR A GREAT MARRIAGE  Recipient ZIP Code: 54115



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0108
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$550,000.00


2008
90FE0124
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,100,000.00



Recipient: FOUNTAIN OF LIFE INTERNATIONAL MINISTRIES  Recipient ZIP Code: 33027



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0073
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$438,383.00


Award Subtotal:
$438,383.00



Recipient: FRIENDSHIP WEST BAPTIST CHURCH  Recipient ZIP Code: 75232



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0117
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$542,025.00


Award Subtotal:
$542,025.00



Recipient: Family Guidance, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 15143



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0103
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$1,510,098.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,510,098.00



Recipient: Family Service Center at Houston and Harris County  Recipient ZIP Code: 77006



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0082
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$477,539.00


Award Subtotal:
$477,539.00



Recipient: Family Service, Inc  Recipient ZIP Code: 01840



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0087
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$227,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$227,000.00



Recipient: Family Services of Westchester, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 10573



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0036
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$497,812.00


Award Subtotal:
$497,812.00



Recipient: Fathers & Families Resources/Research Center  Recipient ZIP Code: 46208



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0048
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: Florida State University  Recipient ZIP Code: 32306



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0022
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$530,009.00


Award Subtotal:
$530,009.00



Recipient: Future Foundation  Recipient ZIP Code: 30344



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0045
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$402,632.00


Award Subtotal:
$402,632.00



Recipient: GA ST DEPARTMENT OF HUMAN RESOURCES  Recipient ZIP Code: 30303



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0064
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$225,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$225,000.00



Recipient: GOODWILL INDUSTRIES INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 55104



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0068
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: GOODWILL INDUSTRIES OF CENTRAL TEXAS, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 78753



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0051
2
ACF
1
 09-25-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0051
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$240,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$240,000.00



Recipient: GOODWILL INDUSTRIES OF PITTSBURGH  Recipient ZIP Code: 15202



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0063
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$225,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$225,000.00



Recipient: GRANATO COUNSELING SERVICES  Recipient ZIP Code: 22182



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0006
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$548,932.00


Award Subtotal:
$548,932.00



Recipient: GWINNETT CHILDRENS SHELTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 30515



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0104
2
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: HEALTHY FAMILIES COUNSELING & SUPPORT  Recipient ZIP Code: 64119



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0008
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: HEALTHY FAMILY INITIATIVES  Recipient ZIP Code: 77074



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0081
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$537,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$537,000.00



Recipient: HEALTHY START, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 15208



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0103
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$900,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$900,000.00



Recipient: HOOPA VALLEY BUSINESS COUNCIL, EDUCATION DEPARTMENT  Recipient ZIP Code: 95546



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0001
2
ACF
1
 09-26-2008
$0.00


2008
90FN0001
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$146,750.00


Award Subtotal:
$146,750.00



Recipient: Healthy Families/Thriving Communities Collaborative Cou  Recipient ZIP Code: 20009



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0049
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: High Country Consulting LLC  Recipient ZIP Code: 82001



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0025
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$549,952.00


Award Subtotal:
$549,952.00



Recipient: IOWA FAMILY POLICY CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 50327



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0126
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: Identity, Inc  Recipient ZIP Code: 20877



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0090
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: Imperial Valley Regional Occupational Program  Recipient ZIP Code: 92243



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0075
2
ACF
1
 03-18-2008
$0.00


2008
90FE0075
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$515,615.00


Award Subtotal:
$515,615.00



Recipient: Indiana Department of Correction  Recipient ZIP Code: 46204



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0019
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$249,896.00


2008
90FR0101
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$400,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$649,896.00



Recipient: Indiana Youth Institute  Recipient ZIP Code: 46204



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0086
2
ACF
1
 09-26-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0086
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$999,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$999,000.00



Recipient: JOHN BROWN UNIVERSITY  Recipient ZIP Code: 72761



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0004
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$544,782.00


Award Subtotal:
$544,782.00



Recipient: Jewish Family & Children`s Service of Sarasota-Manatee,  Recipient ZIP Code: 34237



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0068
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$494,943.00


Award Subtotal:
$494,943.00



Recipient: Kanawha Institute for Social Research & Action, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 25064



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0012
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$497,514.00


Award Subtotal:
$497,514.00



Recipient: Kentucky River Foothills Development Council, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 40475



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0125
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$490,680.00


Award Subtotal:
$490,680.00



Recipient: LATIN AMERICAN YOUTH CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 20007



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0072
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$250,000.00


2008
90FR0072
2
ACF
1
 04-29-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: LAUGH YOUR WAY AMERICA  Recipient ZIP Code: 54481



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0005
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$274,933.00


Award Subtotal:
$274,933.00



Recipient: LIGHTHOUSE YOUTH SERVICES, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 45206



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0005
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: LIVE THE LIFE MINISTRIES  Recipient ZIP Code: 32317



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0077
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$549,985.00


Award Subtotal:
$549,985.00



Recipient: LONGVIEW WELNESS CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 75601



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0091
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$1,500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,500,000.00



Recipient: LUTHERAN SOCIAL SERVICES OF SOUTH DAKOTA  Recipient ZIP Code: 57105



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0097
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0097
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: MARRIAGE SAVERS OF CLARK COUNTY  Recipient ZIP Code: 45503



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0009
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$540,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$540,000.00



Recipient: MD ST DEPARTMENT OF HUMAN RESOURCES  Recipient ZIP Code: 21201



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0091
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$899,991.00


2008
90FR0092
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$441,514.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,341,505.00



Recipient: MODEL CITIES – EL PASO  Recipient ZIP Code: 79935



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0053
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$499,758.00


Award Subtotal:
$499,758.00



Recipient: MOREHOUSE COLLEGE  Recipient ZIP Code: 30314



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0066
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$549,147.00


Award Subtotal:
$549,147.00



Recipient: Madison Cty Com Health Centers, Inc  Recipient ZIP Code: 46015



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0039
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$546,983.00


Award Subtotal:
$546,983.00



Recipient: Meier Clinics Foundation  Recipient ZIP Code: 60187



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0011
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$2,000,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$2,000,000.00



Recipient: Metro United Methodist Urban Ministry  Recipient ZIP Code: 92116



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0016
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$268,349.00


Award Subtotal:
$268,349.00



Recipient: Minnesota Council on Crime and Justice  Recipient ZIP Code: 55406



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0028
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$400,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$400,000.00



Recipient: Montrose County Health and Human Services  Recipient ZIP Code: 81401



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0079
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$249,552.00


Award Subtotal:
$249,552.00



Recipient: NATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF MARRIAGE ENHANCEMENT  Recipient ZIP Code: 85022



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0040
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: NATIONAL FATHERHOOD INITIATIVE  Recipient ZIP Code: 20877



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FB0001
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$999,534.00


Award Subtotal:
$999,534.00



Recipient: NATIONAL MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS SOCIETY  Recipient ZIP Code: 10017



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0090
2
ACF
1
 06-06-2008
$0.00


2008
90FE0090
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$495,285.00


Award Subtotal:
$495,285.00



Recipient: NATIONAL ORGANIZATION OF CONCERNED BLACK MEN, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 20006



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0047
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: NEW MEXICO STATE UNIVERSITY REGENTS  Recipient ZIP Code: 88003



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0135
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$494,996.00


2008
90FR0057
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$218,336.00


Award Subtotal:
$713,332.00



Recipient: NJ ST DEPARTMENT OF CORRECTIONS  Recipient ZIP Code: 08625



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0026
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$394,248.00


Award Subtotal:
$394,248.00



Recipient: NORTHWEST FAMILY SERVICES  Recipient ZIP Code: 97213



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0079
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$1,100,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,100,000.00



Recipient: NW Marriage Institute  Recipient ZIP Code: 98682



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0041
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$275,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$275,000.00



Recipient: New York Youth At Risk, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 10038



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0093
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$225,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$225,000.00



Recipient: Northwood-Apppold United Methodist Church  Recipient ZIP Code: 21218



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0062
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$400,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$400,000.00



Recipient: Nueva Esperanza  Recipient ZIP Code: 19140



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0069
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: OAKLAND FAMILY SERVICES  Recipient ZIP Code: 48053



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0070
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$200,170.00


Award Subtotal:
$200,170.00



Recipient: OAKLAND/LIVINGSTON HUMAN SERVICES AGENCY  Recipient ZIP Code: 48056



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0010
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$368,555.00


Award Subtotal:
$368,555.00



Recipient: OH St Governor`s Office of Faith Based & Comm Initiativ  Recipient ZIP Code: 43215



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0109
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$544,140.00


Award Subtotal:
$544,140.00



Recipient: OK ST DEPARTMENT OF HUMAN SERVICES  Recipient ZIP Code: 73125



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0030
2
ACF
1
 03-18-2008
$0.00


2008
90FE0030
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$549,791.00


Award Subtotal:
$549,791.00



Recipient: OPERATION KEEPSAKE  Recipient ZIP Code: 44087



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0021
2
ACF
1
 03-18-2008
$0.00


2008
90FE0021
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$459,419.00


Award Subtotal:
$459,419.00



Recipient: OPPORTUNITIES INDUSTRIAL CENTER OF AMERICA, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 19122



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0016
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: Osborne Association, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 10455



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0050
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$448,856.00


2008
90FR0050
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0056
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$698,856.00



Recipient: PAIRS FOUNDATION  Recipient ZIP Code: 33332



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0029
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$990,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$990,000.00



Recipient: PARENTS PLUS  Recipient ZIP Code: 54952



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0113
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$549,629.00


2008
90FE0113
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$549,629.00



Recipient: PEACE, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 13202



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0107
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$465,937.00


Award Subtotal:
$465,937.00



Recipient: PEER ASSISTANCE SERVICES, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 80231



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0020
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$525,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$525,000.00



Recipient: PERSONAL INVOLVEMENT CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 90003



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0092
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: PITTSBURG PRESCHOOL COORDINATION COUNCIL, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 94565



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0012
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: PREGNANCY SUPPORT CENTER OF STARK COUNTY  Recipient ZIP Code: 44708



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0055
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$535,075.00


Award Subtotal:
$535,075.00



Recipient: PRIVATE INDUSTRY COUNCIL OF WESTMORELAND FAYETTE INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 15601



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0075
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


2008
90FR0075
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: PROJECT S.O.S., INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 32224



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0074
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$454,332.00


Award Subtotal:
$454,332.00



Recipient: PUBLIC STRATEGIES INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 73116



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0026
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$1,000,000.00


2008
90FH0001
3
ACF
0
 09-29-2008
$3,250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$4,250,000.00



Recipient Recipient: PUERTO RICAN FAMILY INSTITUTE, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 10011



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0013
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$900,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$900,000.00



Recipient: Parents as Teachers National Center, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 63146



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0080
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: Professional Counseling Resources, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 19805



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0046
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: QUILEUTE INDIAN TRIBE  Recipient ZIP Code: 98350



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0002
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$150,000.00


2008
90FN0002
2
ACF
1
 09-26-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$150,000.00



Recipient: RECAPTURING THE VISION, INTERNATIONAL, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 33157



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0043
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: RED CLIFF TRIBE  Recipient ZIP Code: 54814



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0003
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


2008
90FN0003
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$146,672.00


Award Subtotal:
$146,672.00



Recipient: REGION II COMMUNITY ACTION AGENCY  Recipient ZIP Code: 49204



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0078
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$203,854.00


Award Subtotal:
$203,854.00



Recipient: REGION XIX EDUCATION SERVICE CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 79925



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0042
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$900,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$900,000.00



Recipient: RIDGE Project, Inc  Recipient ZIP Code: 43527



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0044
2
ACF
1
 06-06-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0044
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$412,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$412,000.00



Recipient: ROCKDALE HOSPITAL & HEALTH SYSTEM  Recipient ZIP Code: 30012



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0014
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$455,510.00


Award Subtotal:
$455,510.00



Recipient: ROSALIE MANOR  Recipient ZIP Code: 53210



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0037
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: Read To Me International Foundation  Recipient ZIP Code: 96815



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0062
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: Relationship Research Foundation, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 92612



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0058
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: Resource, Inc  Recipient ZIP Code: 55404



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0022
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: Resources for Children`s Health  Recipient ZIP Code: 19102



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0040
2
ACF
2
 09-26-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0040
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: SAMARITAN COUNSELING CENTER  Recipient ZIP Code: 87102



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0067
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$549,961.00


Award Subtotal:
$549,961.00



Recipient: SAMARITAN COUNSELING CENTERS  Recipient ZIP Code: 97212



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0121
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$462,919.00


Award Subtotal:
$462,919.00



Recipient: SOUTH PUGET INTERTRIBAL PLANNING AGENCY  Recipient ZIP Code: 98584



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0004
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$150,000.00


2008
90FN0004
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$150,000.00



Recipient: SOUTHERN UNIVERSITY AND A&M COLLEGE  Recipient ZIP Code: 70813



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0027
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$249,548.00


Award Subtotal:
$249,548.00



Recipient: SOUTHWEST KEY PROGRAMS, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 78704



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0034
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$460,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$460,000.00



Recipient: ST MARY COMMUNITY ACTION AGENCY  Recipient ZIP Code: 70538



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0094
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$230,092.00


Award Subtotal:
$230,092.00



Recipient: SUNY, STONY BROOK  Recipient ZIP Code: 11794



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0131
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


2008
90FE0131
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$549,910.00


Award Subtotal:
$549,910.00



Recipient: SUQUAMISH & KLALLAM HEALTH PLAN  Recipient ZIP Code: 98346



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0010
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$150,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$150,000.00



Recipient: Sacramento Healthy Marriage Project  Recipient ZIP Code: 95821



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0015
2
ACF
1
 09-26-2008
$0.00


2008
90FE0015
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$549,256.00


Award Subtotal:
$549,256.00



Recipient: Scholarship and Guidance Association  Recipient ZIP Code: 60603



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0042
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$483,333.00


2008
90FE0137
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$242,770.00


Award Subtotal:
$726,103.00



Recipient: Shalom Task Force  Recipient ZIP Code: 10274



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0106
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$480,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$480,000.00



Recipient: Shelby County Division of Corrections  Recipient ZIP Code: 38103



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0067
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0067
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$500,000.00


2008
90FR0095
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$485,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$985,000.00



Recipient: South Coast Business Employment Corporation  Recipient ZIP Code: 97420



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0023
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$400,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$400,000.00



Recipient: St. Louis Healthy Marriage Coalition  Recipient ZIP Code: 63103



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0133
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$1,099,882.00


2008
90FE0133
2
ACF
1
 06-06-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,099,882.00



Recipient: TANANA CHIEFS CONFERENCE  Recipient ZIP Code: 99701



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0005
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$146,016.00


2008
90FN0005
2
ACF
1
 09-14-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$146,016.00



Recipient: TEEN-AID, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 99207



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0102
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$495,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$495,000.00



Recipient: TEXAS ARMS OF LOVE (dba, PEOPLE OF PRINCIPLE)  Recipient ZIP Code: 79761



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0102
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$425,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$425,000.00



Recipient: TEXAS HEALTH & HUMAN SERVICES COMMISSION  Recipient ZIP Code: 78711



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0019
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$900,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$900,000.00



Recipient: TEXAS STATE UNIVERSITY-SAN MARCOS  Recipient ZIP Code: 78666



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0128
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$497,641.00


Award Subtotal:
$497,641.00



Recipient: THE DIBBLE FUND FOR MARRIAGE EDUCATION  Recipient ZIP Code:



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0024
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: THE FAMILY HEALTH AND EDUCATION INSTITUTE, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 20706



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0084
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$500,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$500,000.00



Recipient: THE HIVE CREATIVE GROUP  Recipient ZIP Code: 36303



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0093
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: THE VILLAGE FOR FAMILIES & CHILDREN, INC`  Recipient ZIP Code: 06105



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0045
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: THERAPY HELP, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 80220



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0123
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: TLINGIT & HAIDA TRIBES CENTRAL COUNCIL  Recipient ZIP Code: 99801



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FN0008
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$150,000.00


2008
90FN0008
2
ACF
1
 09-26-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$150,000.00



Recipient: TRINITY HEALTH-ST JOSEPH MERCY-OAKLAND  Recipient ZIP Code: 48341



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0099
3
ACF
0
 09-17-2008
$545,730.00


Award Subtotal:
$545,730.00



Recipient: The Family Life Line, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 87124



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0115
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$495,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$495,000.00



Recipient: The South Carolina Center for Fathers and Families  Recipient ZIP Code: 29204



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0021
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$499,456.00


Award Subtotal:
$499,456.00



Recipient: Trinity Church, Inc  Recipient ZIP Code: 33168



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0060
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$550,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$550,000.00



Recipient: UNITED WAY OF JACKSON COUNTY, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 49201



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0138
2
ACF
0
 02-11-2008
$1,099,461.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,099,461.00



Recipient: UNIVERSITY BEHAVIORAL ASSOCIATES  Recipient ZIP Code: 10467



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0086
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$495,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$495,000.00



Recipient: UNIVERSITY OF ARKANSAS FOR MEDICAL SCIENCES  Recipient ZIP Code: 72205



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0041
2
ACF
1
 08-26-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0041
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: UNIVERSITY OF CENTRAL FLORIDA  Recipient ZIP Code: 32826



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0003
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$273,293.00


Award Subtotal:
$273,293.00



Recipient: UNIVERSITY OF LOUISVILLE RESEARCH FOUNDATION  Recipient ZIP Code: 40292



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0002
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$542,920.00


Award Subtotal:
$542,920.00



Recipient: UNIVERSITY OF NORTH CAROLINA AT CHAPEL HILL  Recipient ZIP Code: 27599



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0094
2
ACF
1
 06-06-2008
$0.00


2008
90FE0094
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$530,482.00


Award Subtotal:
$530,482.00



Recipient: UPPER DES MOINES OPPORTUNITY, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 51342



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0082
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$225,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$225,000.00



Recipient: UTAH STATE UNIVERSITY  Recipient ZIP Code: 84322



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0129
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$417,324.00


Award Subtotal:
$417,324.00



Recipient: Urban Ventures Leadership Foundation  Recipient ZIP Code: 55408



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0033
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: VISITING NURSE ASSOCIATION  Recipient ZIP Code: 05401



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0029
2
ACF
1
 07-31-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0029
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: VISTA COMMUNITY CLINIC  Recipient ZIP Code: 92084



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0024
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: WAIT Training  Recipient ZIP Code: 80111



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0051
3
ACF
0
 09-26-2008
$1,010,330.00


Award Subtotal:
$1,010,330.00



Recipient: WAYNE METROPOLITAN COMMUNITY ACTION AGENCY  Recipient ZIP Code: 48192



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0008
2
ACF
2
 06-06-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0008
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



Recipient: WELD COUNTY RESOURCES DEPARTMENT  Recipient ZIP Code: 80632



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0134
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$974,358.00


Award Subtotal:
$974,358.00



Recipient: WOMEN’S OPPORTUNITY AND RESOURCE DEVELOPMENT, INC.  Recipient ZIP Code: 59802



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0054
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$212,399.00


2008
90FR0054
2
ACF
1
 06-06-2008
$0.00


Award Subtotal:
$212,399.00



Recipient: WSOS COMMUNITY ACTION COMMISSION, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 43420



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0011
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$249,492.00


Award Subtotal:
$249,492.00



Recipient: YORK COUNTY COMMUNITY ACTION CORPORATION  Recipient ZIP Code: 04073



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0014
2
ACF
1
 06-06-2008
$0.00


2008
90FR0014
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$245,333.00


Award Subtotal:
$245,333.00



Recipient: YOUTH DEVELOPMENT, INC  Recipient ZIP Code: 87105



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0047
3
ACF
0
 09-25-2008
$900,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$900,000.00



Recipient: YWCA OF SAN ANTONIO  Recipient ZIP Code: 78205



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FE0127
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$529,585.00


Award Subtotal:
$529,585.00



Recipient: YouthLaunch, Inc.  Recipient ZIP Code: 78731



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0069
3
ACF
0
 09-14-2008
$243,315.00


Award Subtotal:
$243,315.00



Recipient: enFAMILIA, Inc  Recipient ZIP Code: 33033



FY
Award Number
Budget Year of Support
Agency
Award Code
Action Issue Date
Amount This Action


2008
90FR0039
3
ACF
0
 09-22-2008
$250,000.00


Award Subtotal:
$250,000.00



 



Total of all awards:
$118,310,126.00



   FOR OUR NEXT “CLASS” WE WILL LEARN HOW TO EXAMINE ONE OR TWO OF THESE GRANT RECIPIENTS.     ///
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Written by Let's Get Honest|She Looks It Up

August 24, 2009 at 2:32 PM

Posted in Cast, Script, Characters, Scenery, Stage Directions, Designer Families, Funding Fathers - literally, Organizations, Foundations, Associations NGO Hybrids, public education

Tagged with Abstinence Education, Declaration of Independence/Bill of Rights, Education, fatherhood, Healthy Marriages Promoting Responsible Fatherhood, HHS-TAGGS grants database, obfuscation, Responsible Citizenhood, social commentary, Studying Humans, U.S. Govt $$ hard @ work.., USASPENDING.GOV database

Early Childhood Melodrama — Amber Alerts, Restraining orders, Missing Moms or Dads

with one comment

(This first one ALMOST makes the case for abstinence education or CHMC’s $11 million grant for “saturating the state” with healthy marriage education -target population everyone age 15 or over – IF there was some proof it worked, and if the government should have been in the business — and it is one — of either marriages OR education to start with, which it wasn’t, originally)(and IF it weren’t at the same time abusing federal funds to the states in other categories, which it is…)

AMBER ALERT ISSUED FOR 2-MONTH-OLD BOY TAKEN BY FATHER

PLEASANTON [California] (BCN)

An Amber Alert has been issued for a 2-month-old boy who was taken by force from his mother by his father and uncle in Pleasanton early this morning.

The abduction was reported shortly after 4:45 a.m. in the area of Holland Drive and Payne Road, police Sgt. Barry Mickleburgh said.

Police received near-simultaneous calls from the distraught mother and from neighbors reporting a woman crying inside a vehicle.

The mother, a 17-year-old girl, told arriving officers that 2-month-old Davion Bryceon Dunn was strapped in a car seat in the back of a car when the father, 18-year-old Damiante Dunn, approached and assaulted her.

A female friend had just driven the mother and her baby back from a party, police said. The mother said Dunn had been calling her during the evening and threatening to take the child away if she didn’t tell him where she was, police said.

[[17 yr old girl 2 month old baby, all-night party]] [[Somehow there seems to be more than meets the eye here]].

Damiante Dunn’s brother, 20-year-old Kalandre Dunn, was with him during the confrontation this morning and began assaulting the girl’s friend, who was struggling to hold the baby in the car seat, police said.

Kelandre Dunn allegedly punched the woman in the face and took the baby, according to police.

The Dunn brothers then allegedly drove off with the child in a white 1988 Oldsmobile with 22-inch rims. The car was last seen headed south on Hopyard Road, police said.

Damiante Dunn is described as a black man, 5 feet 11 inches tall and weighing 167 pounds. He has black hair and brown eyes. He was last seen wearing a black T-shirt and black jeans along with a red hat with a white “W” on it and black tennis shoes.

Kelandre Dunn is also black, 5 feet 10 inches tall and weighs 190 pounds with black hair and brown eyes, police said. He was last seen wearing black shorts, a white T-shirt and a black, red and white San Francisco 49ers hat.

The baby was wearing a white “onesie” with a teddy bear on the front.

Pleasanton police issued an Amber Alert but don’t yet have the Oldsmobile’s license plate number.

Authorities are trying to pinpoint where the brothers may have headed.

“They may have ties to Richmond but we’re not able to confirm any of that yet,” Mickleburgh said this morning.

Anyone who spots the Oldsmobile or has information on the baby’s whereabouts is asked to call Pleasanton police at (925) 931-5100.

OK LET’s THINK ABOU THIS, STARTING WITH HOW SOMEONE’S MELODRAMA BECAME A HEADLINE:

Somehow we have an 18 year old (referred to as a man, and the baby’s father) and a 17 year old (referred to in press as a juvenile, the baby’s mother, a girl and a woman) with a little baby, that she had either before or after turning 17, most likely before completing high school.

Where is work and where is college on the plan for either parent? And how does this fit in with an all-night party (coming home at near 5am) and a restraining order, already! And with not living together somehow? To remedy that , the man (18) and brother (21) come and ambush and snatch the baby when the car is stopped (acc. to one account), dragging it from the carseat and assaulting, apparently both women in the car.

With a restraining order one, were the car doors locked or windows open? I didn’t read about broken glass. What occasioned the restraining order?

Why should the American public keep giving money to be put into school systems that are so “smart” they have to pour in extra funds to remedy what they didn’t do the first time (through programs like: healthy marriage abstinence education — still going strong, by the way, I believe, and funded — fatherhood promotion (conducted from within prison sometimes), access visitation funding to the states to get absent Dads (primarily) more involved with their children so the Moms will get off welfare (only this happens to hit Moms NOT on welfare equally hard, as it affects due process in the courts, by diverting legal issues into mediation, parenting classes, etc.) (and sometimes recruits Dads from child support collection offices, in which case the general idea is to bribe Dad to get more involved with their children, and “hope” that some more funds will show up somewhere, whether or not these actually get to the kids) – – and then we utilize police officers to go fetch back a stolen baby, after court resources to issues a restraining order, serving it — and obviously not heeded. Apparently only the existence of the restraining order actually motivated the amber alert to start with.

WHY SHOULD WE BE PAYING THE GOVERNMENT TO CLEAN UP WHAT IT SCREWED UP TO START WITH? IF IT DOESN’T TRUST FAMILIES TO RAISE AND EDUCATE! THEIR OWN KIDS, THEN IT OUGHT TO DO A BETTER JOB, AND A REMARKABLY BETTER ONE, TOO! As it was (below) one of the mothers of the young men persuaded them to turn themselves in and the baby over. They weren’t “caught” except that the alarm was actually sent out.

By the way, the theme of the public school education is NOT being religious (although I say it is), for which nonprofits are formed by both faith organizations and atheist organizations to fight — basically — each other over the public schools.

One of the former, Pacific Justice Institute, I believe was involved in fighting the city of Lodi, California because it wanted to ban the use of the word “Jesus” in public prayer by city officials (or something). They fight for civil rights of some parents (typically Christian, I think) in the public school system. Meanwhile, Focus on the Family a few years back was urging all God-fearing Christian parents to withdraw their children from the public school system in California. Focus on the Family and Dobson (et al. — Promise-Keepers, etc.) are like lukewarm, diluted skim milk on the issue of wife-beating among their ranks. It’s the “family” thing, you know (some of this has played into our case and life history). The atheists take issue, alternately, with the words “under God” in the pledge of allegiance and prayer in schools.

The above paragraph may sound like a ramble, but these are things I have been studying, and which you can too, with time, and checking some of the databases, and significant comparison of internet information with life experiences and laws. Come to think of it, a good deal of this blog might be considered a “ramble,” but that’s my First Amendment privilege — to squawk about things, and assemble, virtually, asking others to get informed and take a second look. Sometimes I even get around to recommending action, in the form of conducting audits. I don’t mean getting someone else to, I mean getting basic, relevant facts yourself after there’s enough background research to get a feel for what’s going on.

It may be possible to homogenize the school system with its incredibly diverse (overall, if not within individual school districts!!) and get it right, one generation, or the other, or maybe about (at this rate) 5 generations from now, if then. Let’s talk about how milk gets homogenized and pasteurized (heating it to a point that beneficial enzymes are killed).

One way might to homogenize the school populations but not have so many teen pregnancies and child-abductions, child abuse, and of course the social plague of fatherlessness, might be teach children NOT to think (the pharmaceutical industry and behavioral health industries can help — and are). I think the psychotropic manner might not be too advisable — some of these DV murder/suicides occurr right after someone was on antipsychotics or let out (Toms River, NJ case in point) of a mental institution. Was it their treatment there, the drugs, or what that right afterwards, someone kills? And if you do too much sedating, the basic human drives might also fall idle, which would then cause problems of production AND procreation. I’m not totally informed, but every now and then one reads about the attempt to create an artificial womb, AND sperm, so perhaps with time, humans will be indeed manufactured like genetically modified vegetables. Mainstream media movies sure have picked up on this long ago, the older one “Robot” and a current one “Surrogates.”

The first-century (A.D. or C.E.) version of this was called gladiators, the real ones. Real blood, and really for entertainment.

Another way might be for a distant government to stop billing the entire country (both those with and those without children) to run things from Washington that weren’t even on the Founder’s brains to do, as in, rather than limiting government to keep it OUT of individual’s lives more than necessary, to expanding it to the point that individuals CANNOT safely have a life without actually working for the government, just about! (recent news item.

Two on-the-clock, armed, Marin County sheriff’s deputies on the same bridge where a woman (and man) was shot to death in a tollbooth recently — for trying to separate, and the man involved, for helping a woman trying to separate — they witnessed the shooting homicide of a 51 and 58 year old man and woman. The deputies were not harmed in this incident, and it could be said they took actions to limit deaths to “only” two, but it does kind of make you wonder — didn’t those two, who died, pay some taxes in their middle aged lifetime so they wouldn’t go onto a bridge and die? So maybe the solution is that we either become, as a country, nothing BUT government institutions (no private lives whatsoever, except for the elite) or we really, really reconsider the phrase “of, by and for the people” and take it literally.

Another way might be to put the burden of educating their children on ALL parents. Like this:

“You want to have kids? Well, whether you do or not is not government business (now THAT would be a novel concept! !!), but IF you do, and they stay in this country, YOU have to be to teach them basic reading, basic math — and basic civic literacy, including the Constitution. This includes in English, too. They do not all have to be reading by even age 5, and no, you do not have to farm them out to be “prepared for school” (what a low goal, given the U.S. Schools systems!), But they DO have to be reading by age 7, barring some serious identified disability — in the CHILD, not in the TEACHERS or in the SCHOOLS! “

If these aren’t parent competencies, then parents can become competent in finding someone they trust who CAN teach these things. Locally, if possible, and then get the basics (including don’t hit, kill, steal, and have sex with the students, or for the most part, students with each other – particularly without protection — until you have something (legal) really going for you as to values, interests, and direction in life.

(A Richmond, CA group linked to California Healthy Marriages site, promotes books, including this one:

Myth of the Common School
Charles Leslie Glenn, Jr.

In this thoughtful, well-wrought study, Charles L. Glenn examines the historical development of the idea that the State should sponsor popular education in order to mold common loyalties and values among its citizens in the interest of national unity. This idea had led inevitably to conflict with parents and groups who do not accept the values and beliefs inculcated by the state and its educators. {{AN INHERENT, BUILT-IN CONFLICT, AND I SAY, WHEN SUCH THINGS EXIST, THE QUESTION TO ASK IS, WHO PROFITS FROM IT? SAME QUESTION COULD AND SHOULD BE ASKED WHEN IT COMES TO THE FAMILY LAW ANSWER. THE ANSWER IS IN THE $$ — WHAT BUSINESSES ARE THESE FAILURES SUPPORTING? THEN IN THE VIEWPOINT OF THOSE BUSINESSES, THE “SYSTEMS” HAVE NOT “FAILED” AT ALL, BUT SUCCEEDED! IT JUST DEPENDS WHOSE BALANCE SHEET IS BEING EXAMINED!}}

Over the years, the issues around which such conflict has arisen have varied, but the underlying positions remain the same. On the one hand there are those who assert the absolute right of parents to control the education of their children. On the other there are those who assert the absolute right of the State to control the education of children and to do so in a way that minimizes the differences among them. Glenn examines this tension primarily as it evolved in nineteenth-century Massachusetts, with reference to parallel developments elsewhere in the United States and in France and the Netherlands. {{LETSGETHONEST NOTES THAT HE OMITS GERMANY/PRUSSIAN MODEL, WHICH OTHER BOOKS HAVE DOCUMENTED}} He ends by reminding us that this continuing conflict over popular education raises troubling questions in a democracy. How, for example, can the pluralism we claim to value, the liberty we cherish, be reconciled with a State pedagogy designed to serve State purposes? Can government assure that each child is educated in the essentials required by the social, political, and economic order without seeking to impose uniformity? He concludes by offering workable and tested solutions to this perennial dilemma. ((Which — charter schools or homeschools, or a total voucher program?}}

Paperback, 382pp, Indexed, ISBN: 1-55815-522-8, $27.95

And another one along the same lines:

Quest for Community

I’m not visionary enough to see what would happen to our country and business as usual IN it, should this actually happen. However, I am smart enough to see what business as usual in this arena IS doing to our country. And this is not speculation in my life; I have lived the before after, differences, raised one child to get in a top university, although the first half of her life was marked by witnessing domestic violence, the second half (basically, about adolescence forward) further trauma from the California Courts, and in-fighting with a relative who determined that anything not public schooling was devilish, but assaulting a pregnant woman in the home, threatening her, including with weapons, and shutting down her profession, bank account, access to credit and transportation over several years, was NOT (this literally happened) and a minor felony-child-stealing event just to rub in who’s boss and so forth. The venom behind this fight, and the incoherent reasoning (and, when such incoherence gets confronted, resorting to other forms of threat, intimidation, and serious damage) in the mouths and on paper from those opposing an ALTERNATE to public schooling — it’s unbelievable. I would not have believed it had I not experienced it. If someone told me (as I am here), even someone I knew, I probably wouldn’t believe it, even as I probably wouldn’t have believed so much violence happened within marriages until I went through this also.

I have taught students of many types and in many venues, and worked with and talked with their parents also, both as the children’s teacher myself (in certain profession), a fellow parent (mother), or simply being a kind of outgoing person, talking to people in my communities about how they raised their kids and so forth. In addition, I read, networked, and corresponded, including a few times overseas, and compared notes. I have no Ph.D. I had a Mrs. (for what that was worth – not much!) and a M.O.M. And I have a rich databank enough to allow that there might be more than one way, and to identify several of them, to get young people up to speed. One daughter has succeeded in the top (literally) public school in the state — and this “top” designation very likely had to do with its household income base, not ethics, morality, values or much else. We had at this time increasing poverty and stress because of this fight to eradicate civil and legal rights, and it was done in the court system and with those institutions and agencies that work in concert with this system.

There is an unbelievable degree of comingling and inbreeding (I call it that! Others call it “cooperation”) between what should be neutral and separate entitities. Civic literacy is related to public education, and public education isn’t passing with flying colors on many of the basics of civic literacy (let alone civil rights!).

Yes, I realize this would transform society and affect employment. On the other hand, how bad an idea is that? Yes, I realize, this would REALLY upset too many apple carts. However, clearly we’re already upset (see Amber Alerts, which essentially are parental kidnappings (mostly), domestic violence murder/suicides, unnecessary ones, and the frivolous protection offered by protection orders.

Anyhow – – we must pay more attention to the INSTITUTIONS driving our lives, and be as critical as possible towards them.

So, anyhow, I read about this latest Amber alert and wondered WHY. I spared the blog a lot more of the philosophizing, so be thankful.

Amber Alert Canceled; Boy Returned to Family KSBW

POSTED: 9:22 am PDT August 19, 2009
UPDATED: 2:15 pm PDT August 19, 2009

PLEASANTON, Calif. — A 2-month-old Pleasanton boy who police say was abducted by his father and uncle after they attacked his mother has been found safe.

Pleasanton police said Davion Bryceon Dunn was recovered late Wednesday morning after the boy’s grandmother arranged for the alleged abductors to surrender.

Authorities said Davion was kidnapped earlier in the day by his father, 18-year-old Diamante Dunn, and his uncle, Kalandre Dunn, while riding in a car with his mother and another woman.

The boy’s mother told police that the men attacked her at a stop sign, snatched Davion and fled in another car.

Authorities issued an Amber Alert after the mother said she had a domestic violence restraining order against Dunn. Police said they considered both men dangerous.

{{Makes one wonder whether had there been on restraining order, they would’ve acted.}}

BABY DAVION RETURNED:

PLEASANTON —A man [18 yrs old] who abducted his 2-month-old son this morning has turned himself in to Antioch police, and the baby is safe, police said.

Damiante Dunn, 18, and his brother, 20-year-old Kelandre Dunn, surrendered to Antioch police at 11:20 a.m. after one of their mothers arranged for them to turn themselves in, police said.

Authorities say Damiante Dunn took the baby from a car driven by the child’s mother after assaulting her. Another woman in the car, who was trying to protect the baby, was also assaulted.

Pleasanton police say they were called about 4:50 a.m. to a neighborhood on Holland Drive and Payne Road after residents called saying a woman was crying inside (NOT DRIVING??) (NO CELL PHONES??) a car there. They found a 17-year-old woman in the car who said the baby’s father, Dunn, and his brother took the child by force. She said she and the baby, Davion Bryceon Dunn, and an adult friend had pulled up to a home in the neighborhood.

Police said Kelandre Dunn reached into the backseat of the car to take the baby and punched the mother’s friend in the face when she tried to keep the baby in his car seat. Damiante Dunn pulled the baby’s mother out of the car and sped away in a white 1988 Oldsmobile.
The mother said Damiante Dunn had been calling her Tuesday night threatening to take Davion from her if she didn’t tell him where she was.

Family and Friends of Missing Boy Pass Out Fliers in Hopes of Finding Child
Created by Kimberlee Sakamoto on 8/18/2009 6:58:00 PM

Not yet found:

OAKLAND (KRON) – The family and friends of a missing 5-year-old with cerebral palsy are continuing their search for the boy by handing out fliers in the neighborhood where he was last seen.

Hasanni Campbell’s grandmother Pamela Clark and aunt Jennifer organized the group.

On Tuesday they grabbed fliers and spread out to cover as much ground as possible.

“Oh it’s really hard. Hope keeps me alive,” said Pamela.

Some of the volunteers who never knew Hasanni say it’s important to do whatever it takes to find the boy.
Lashawenda Collins tells KRON 4’s Terisa Estacio why she felt the need to help, “I have nieces, I have a daughter. And my friends have kids also. And it could be one of us out here, looking.
The five-year-old has been missing since August 10th when his foster father, Louis Ross, left him next to a car parked outside a shoe store where Jennifer, Ross’ fiancée, works.

Oakland police and Crime Stoppers announced a reward of up to $10,000 on Monday for information leading to the whereabouts of Hasanni.

Police say they’ve received fewer than 50 tips in the case.
Stay with KRON 4 and KRON4.com for the latest developments on the search for Hasanni.

(SAME CASE):

Associated Press – August 19, 2009 8:04 PM ET

OAKLAND, Calif. (AP) – Oakland police say a tip line set up in the hopes it would help find a missing boy is operating again after numerous calls from one tipster tied up the line.

Police spokesman Jeff Thomason says the Crime Stoppers tip line is up and running after one caller left about 40 messages, none of which turned out to be credible.

The line was set up in the hopes leads would come in that would help authorities find 5-year-old Hasanni Campbell. A reward of up to $10,000 is also being offered for information.

The boy has been missing since Aug. 10 when his foster father, Louis Ross, left him in a car parked near a shoe store where his foster mother works.

Ross says Hasanni was gone when he returned.

KANSAS CITY, MISSOURI – 2009 — MOM DEAD, DAD & GIRL STILL MISSING, AMBER ALERT USELESS NOW, THEY SAY

Amber Alert Ends, Girl Still Missing

Girl’s Mother Found Dead In KC Home

POSTED: 10:59 am CST March 6, 2009
UPDATED: 9:43 am CST March 7, 2009

KANSAS CITY, Mo. — Police said the father of a missing 4-year-old girl is considered a person of interest in the case.

An Amber Alert for Allison Corrales was issued Friday morning after Kansas City police found her mother dead inside an east-side apartment. Police lifted it on Saturday, but only because they said the alerts lose effectiveness after 24 hours.

Officers said they found 27-year-old Katia Lainez dead at the Sterling Court Apartments at 4023 Harvard Circle. Her 4-year-old daughter, Allison, remained missing more than 24 hours after her mother’s body was found.

Police said they want to talk to Allison’s father, Luis Corrales, 31.

“There is a restraining order against the girl’s father. And so, they’re going to want to talk to him to find out what he may know,” police Capt. Rich Lockhart said.

Relatives said the last time they saw Lainez was Wednesday night. Lainez’s sister said she was worried about what Luis Corrales would do.

Lainez was found by her brother-in-law, Orlando Melgar, who said he went to the apartment to check on her.

Lainez’s sister, Lelis Perez, said Luis Corrales showed up from Houston on Sunday night and wouldn’t leave.

“Wherever you are, return the baby,” Melgar said.

Lainez had filed an order of protection against Luis Corrales. According to court documents, Lainez said, “He told me many times that if I leave him, he will kill me.” {{Which, apparently, he did}}.

Lainez also testified that she was afraid Luis Corrales would hurt Allison.

Lainez worked at the Golden Corral in Blue Springs. The manager said Lainez was great with staff and customers. Neighbors said Allison was often seen playing near her apartment. Other children called her Allie.

“She would just be playing along with the other children. When they’d ride their bikes, she would follow along, you know,” said Marcia Sellars with Sterling Watch Group.

Perez said she’s feeling the pain of her sister’s death, and she’s worried about what happened to her niece. Perez said she’s concerned her niece is in danger.

Vehicle Missing

Investigators said the family vehicle, a red 1999 Kia Sportage with Missouri license plate PB1-R3R, is missing. Police said a car belonging to Luis Corrales was parked outside the apartment.Luis Corrales was described a 5 feet 5 inches tall, 150 pounds, with black hair and brown eyes. He reportedly has family in Houston and Manassas, Va.

Anyone with information regarding any of this is asked to call 911 or the TIPS Hotline at 816-474-8477.

More Info

Katia Lainez Court Document Page 1

Katia Lainez Court Document Page 2

Katia Lainez Court Document Page 3

Katia Lainez Court Document Page 4

Katia Lainez Court Document Page 5

Katia Lainez Court Document Page 6

“Amber Alert restraining order” googled — always seems to bring up more than what I was searching for..

4 youngsters are kidnapped, San Antonio, Texas – Michigan

Ages 13 (daughter), 9, 6 & 5 (nieces & nephews)

Kidnapping Dad was 53; guardian had just died, biological mother had CPS take them away

Authorities have cancelled an Amber Alert after four San Antonio-area children, who were abducted by a 53-year-old man, were found unharmed in Michigan.

Alphonse Harris was arrested without incident at 10:45 a.m. at a home in Pontiac, Mich., where police found his daughter, 13-year-old Briana Harris, and her cousins: Dantae Lamar Harris, 5; Kenneth Dominic Harris, 6; and Nichelle Denise Harris, 9.

According to Deputy Ino Badillo, spokesman for the Bexar County Sheriff’s Office, Harris called deputies here around 8:45 a.m. and said he wanted to surrender. But he gave authorities a fictitious address, Badillo said, so it took some time for Pontiac officials and the FBI to find him.

Harris was sitting on the front steps of the home when authorities arrived, Badillo said, and was taken into custody immediately. He was taken to the Oakland County Jail on three counts of kidnapping and two counts of assault bodily injury-family, one of which was a previous charge, Badillo said.

Harris came to San Antonio at the beginning of August after his ex-wife became seriously ill, authorities said. She became unconscious around Aug. 11 after suffering a heart attack or stroke, Badillo said.

She remained on life support at a local hospital until Sunday. Shortly after her death, Harris packed the children in a car belonging to the deceased guardian and drove north. While the group was near Killeen, the oldest child sent text messages to an aunt that relayed her fears about being held against her will. The messages stopped after her father learned she was texting, according to Badillo.

“The suspect threatened to injure her if she contacted anybody else,” the sheriff’s spokesman said.

Relatives said the children already had endured multiple hardships before the death of their guardian, Harris’ ex-wife, who divorced the suspect 13 years ago.

Three of the children were placed in temporary custody of their grandmother after Child Protective Services terminated parental rights to their 27-year-old biological mother, LaKiesha Harris. (WHY??)

Authorities and LaKiesha Harris said the suspect has a history of mental illness, including schizophrenia. Records show he has spent time in jail for assault bodily injury, violating a protective order, theft, criminal trespass and making terroristic threats.

(Let me get this: the temporary custody guardian whose care they were in, had a schizo assaultive ex? Way to go, CPS!)

Badillo said Harris will be extradited to San Antonio within 30 days, and Pontiac Child Protective Services are in contact with local authorities to reach the children’s relatives.

Massachusetts, 6 month old, suicide/murder threats from Father

Infant’s father charged after Amber Alert set off ; Allegedly vowed to kill son, self if anyone tried to take his child

Article from:

The Boston Globe (Boston, MA)

Article date:

May 2, 2008

Author:

John R. Ellement; Andrew

CAMBRIDGE – An Arlington man who triggered an Amber Alert on Wednesday had vowed to kill his 6-month-old son, shoot five people, and then kill himself if anyone tried to take away the infant, a prosecutor said in court yesterday.

The infant, identified by Arlington police as Lucas Whalen, was in the temporary custody of a relative of his mother’s, as the Department of Social Services and the courts decide who should take care of him.

The infant’s father – Michael Whalen, 42 – was arraigned yesterday in Cambridge District Court, where he pleaded not guilty to parental kidnapping, threats, and receiving stolen property over $250. He was ordered held on $25,000 cash bail by Judge Roanne Sragow.

Dad ordered to make child support payments: mother (dead) found, 4 yr old child, missing: date unknown

Amber alert issued for missing 4-year-old girl; mother’s body discovered

Kansas City Police have issued an amber alert for the 4-year-old daughter of a woman whose body was discovered this morning in her Kansas City apartment.

Police were called to the apartment at 4023 Harvard Circle about 9:15 a.m. and discovered the 27-year-old woman’s body. The apartment complex is near Interstate 70 and Sterling Avenue.

The woman’s 4-year-old daughter, Allyson Corrales, was missing.

Police also are looking for the girl’s father, Luis F. Corrales, 31, who they are describing as a person of interest.

The family’s car, a red 1999 Kia Sportage, with Missouri license plate PB1 R3R, is also missing.

Luis Corrales’ car was towed from the apartment parking lot this afternoon.

Anyone with information is asked to call the TIPS hotline at 816-474-8477.

An order of protection was filed against Luis Corrales in November, according to Jackson County court documents. At that time, he listed an Independence address.

In December, a judge ordered Corrales to make monthly child support payments.

Police Capt. Rich Lockhart said the woman’s body was discovered after her brother reported that he had not talked to her since Wednesday night.

post 1247518389

Novato, UNITED STATES (USA), Mon 13 Jul 2009, 21:21 GMT
TWENTY-SEVEN-YEAR-OLD JAMES MITCHELL IS NOW BEHIND BARS AT THE MARIN COUNTY JAIL..
HE’S CHARGED WITH KILLING HIS EX-GIRLFRIEND AND TAKING OFF WITH THEIR ONE YEAR OLD DAUGHTER…
IT’S A STORY FILLED WITH TRAGEDY AND VIOLENCE.
A STORY OF WOMAN WHO TRIED BUT FAILED TO FIND SAFETY.

NOVATO, CA
:10 GINA STAHL-RICCO / VICTIM’S FRIEND
:51 CHARLOTTE HUGGINS / VICTIM’S LAWYER
1:15 CLAUDIA STEVENS / VICTIM’S MOTHER
1:45 CAPTAIN JAMES BERG / NOVATO POLICE DEPT
CLAUDINE WANG / FOX NEWS (reporter not on cam/no tag)
————————————————————————————————————
IT WAS HERE ON DIABLO COURT… AT HER MOTHERS HOME… IN THE TOWN SHE GREW UP IN … THAT 29 YEAR OLD DANIELLE KELLER WAS TRYING TO CREATE A SAFE HOME FOR HERSELF AND HER BABY GIRL.

her baby was so sweet she was a really good mother…all about taking care of her :12

THERE WERE TEARS OF FRUSTATION ANGER AND REGRET THIS MORNING FROM FRIENDS… AS INVESTIGATORS SEARCHED FOR CLUES ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED HERE LAST NIGHT.

WHAT WE DO KNOW IS THAT A NEIGHBOR CALLED AFTER POLICEHEARING AN ASSAULT… POLICE GOT ON SCENE THREE MINUTES LATER AND FOUND DANIELLE WAS DEAD AND HER BABY GIRL GONE.

AN AMBER ALERT WAS CALLED FOR THE BABY AND THE LITTLE GIRLS FATHER 27 YEAR OLD JAMES MITCHELL.. A MAN WITH A HISTORY OF VIOLENCE.

MITCHELL ALREADY HAD ONE RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST FROM SAN FRANCISCO HIM.. AND AFTER HE FAILED TO SHOW UP FOR ANOTHER COURT APPEARANCE ON TUESDAY.. A MARIN COUNTY JUDGE ISSUED ANOTHER.

HE LIKELY GOT THAT NEWS ON SATURDAY.

AND THEN CAME SUNDAY…

we’ve been worried and we lock… and he’s using drugs.. he’s a very .. big history :10

THE SUSPECT’S.. FATHER WAS PORN KING JIM MITCHELLL… WHO HAD HIS OWN VIOLENT PAST.

THE YOUNGER MITCHELL WAS FINALLY TRACKED DOWN IN CITRUS HEIGHTS… WHERE HE WAS ARRESTED WITHOUT INCIDENT… THE BABY GIRL WAS NOT HURT AND PUT IN PROTECTIVE CUSTODY.

what we were able to.. specifically citrus heights :16

TODAY AS THE INVESTIGATION PUSHES FORWARD…FAMILY MEMBERS ARE LEFT TO MOURN THE LOSS OF A YOUNG MOTHER WHO WAS SIMPLY SEARCHING FOR SAFETY.

i think she knew she was not in a good situation from what she told me

_____________________________

COMMENT:

Sometimes parents have custody orders or restraining orders, their children are taken, and the authorities do NOT issue an Amber Alert or help retrieve. This comments on why, and may be a decent resource (not that I can afford their books!): “http://www.aardvarc.org”

How was I supposed to know? when my children were taken (violation of physical custody order — it consisted of felony child-stealing in the manner this particular one was done) and the police wouldn’t act, that I should’ve gone to court and asked the judge to order the police to act? (I already had the custody order!!). Then we got a family law attorney, a pricey-one, who got this judge, and had a captive audience, and didn’t ask for a bench warrant for the man’s arrest, but instead shunted me off to mediation !! (Where I then lost custody, having not even received an intake form, which would’ve allowed me to check “child-stealing,” although he most certainly was told of the situation — and still ignored it!)

Is it like a magic code — if you say the right words, it gets a certain result?

No, rather, there is more than meets the eye going on in this venue. However, here’s a man from Texas, and AARDVARC response:

I have a TRO (Temp Restraining order) that was issued yesterday against the mother of my child. The order states that “the court having examined the affidavit of the petitioner (me) finds that pursuant to T.F.C. sec.105.001(c) ‘Good Cause’ exisist and it is, therefore, ORDERED that: a. The clerk of this court issue an order attaching the bodies of the child of this suit and placing the child into the possession of the petitioner, and
b. Respondent is hereby excluded from the possession of or access to the child until further orders of this court.”

I have gone to the police and filed a report that I have the TRO and that my son is in imminent physical and emotional danger, yet they WILL NOT separate the child from his mother if I can find them. They stated that it is a civil matter and even if I had court orders that placed him in my custody full time, and her having no rights to our son, they would not intervene. The only recourse that I would have is to notify the court that she is in violation and then the court would take action.

{{Huh? Sounds like maybe the man didn’t serve her yet, but that’s an inappropriate response of the police!} I’m sorry for my candor but WHAT THE HELL. This woman is emotionally unstable, abusing prescription painkillers and has a history of neglect. She gets wasted on pain pills and sleeps all day while my son walks the streets and the police cant do a damn thing!?!? She has stated that she is on her way to Canada but my son called his great grandmother yesterday and said they are in Oklahoma and headding back to the area that day.

Someone PLEASE help me, what can I do to get an AMBER ALERT issued so I can get my son out of this dangerous situation? Reply or email me ASAP. I havent slept singe she “abducted” him from me on monday. I use the term losely because there are no standing custody orders. He only has the clothes on his back and she has no income but may have $650 and access to a car in my name.

First, has the order been SERVED to her? In other words, has she received notification FROM THE COURT that she’s not to have the child? Unless and until that happens, the rest is probably a moot point. Until the order is served, they’re typically not entered into the system and thus not even available for law enforcement to act upon, even if they’re standing right next to her.

Second, how police will react, once there is a valid and enforceable order, can depend on which “police” you’re talking about and exactly how the “finding” occurs. Is law enforcement going to go to her and get the child? No.

However, should you happen to find them together, and you summon the sheriff’s office (a branch that is responsible for ENFORCING orders of the court) and they have to make a call at the scene, you can pretty much count on the child going home with you. City and municipal-based law enforcement agencies, while they may be able to act on CRIMINAL orders, will typically not get involved with CIVIL orders, like this one. In court-related matters or orders, particularly of a civil nature, the sheriff’s office is the route for assistance.

((I was already dealing with a sheriff’s office. While possession is — evidently — 10/10ths of the law, I was dealing with a man I was genuinely afraid of, who used to hit and collect weapons, etc. and seemed to be escalating in the months prior to the snatch)).

Quote:

This woman is emotionally unstable, abusing prescription painkillers and has a history of neglect. She gets wasted on pain pills and sleeps all day while my son walks the streets and the police cant do a damn thing!?!?

And yet, after all this time, you’ve not pursued a formal custody case?

Are we talking about a 12 year old or a 2 year old walking the streets? Is the child of school age and attending school? That alone makes a HUGE difference. Who has made reports to CPS about the child walking the streets? How many reports have been made? What was the outcome of those investigations? Were police called when the child was “walking the streets”? Did they find and return the child or report the neglect (again, the age of the child makes a difference here)?

As Mr. K points out, failure to abide by the court’s order could result in a warrant being issued. Still, that won’t have anyone out combing the street looking for her or the child. She’ll get nabbed just like 95% of other people with warrants: either she’ll have a brake light out or commit some traffic infraction, or, some “helpful” citizen will notify a law enforcement officer that “this is where she is right now, and she’s wanted”.

Finally, even the issuing of a civil order like this one generally doesn’t meet Amber alert standards – they too will regard this as a civil custody issue. If you’ve got some actual and credible threat against the child, they might consider it, but in absence of such, I wouldn’t get my hopes up for an Amber alert. Unless there are important details you’ve neglected to mention, the burden of IMMINENT physical danger is lacking (and emotional doesn’t count). It’s not going to be treated as an abduction since you didn’t HAVE custody to begin with – you got it after the fact (ergo it’s still a civil issue).

((Well this IS something to learn a few years later, although I most certainly had custody well prior to the fact. . . . . ))

Written by Let's Get Honest|She Looks It Up

August 20, 2009 at 2:21 PM

Posted in Cast, Script, Characters, Scenery, Stage Directions, compulsory schooling, Designer Families, Domestic Violence vs Family Law, public education, Where's Mom?

“Wife fought off Pa. man killed in shootout.” Maybe–MAYBE, Forget the Restraining Orders, Remember 2nd Amendment? Or, toss a coin…

with 2 comments

Part II of II on “Responsible Citizenhood” is in labor.

The waters have broken, and there is a flood of information and synthesis of concepts gushing forth on many topics, and my brain is dialating. They will have to be posted in stages.

Translation: I am being a Responsible Citizen (see prior posts) and exploring who is my Congress, the Constitution, who is funding whom, and finding all kinds of juicy information on whose idea was it to reinstitute a national religion called Fatherhood, funded by all of us. I have also located a few new (to me at least) search tools How many thoughts have been provoked!

But, this (relatively) recent news alert reminded me, that Part of Responsible Citizenhood might entail learning how to handle a gun, and being willing to use it during a home invasion. Even a home invasion by an estranged husband:

Wife fought off Pa. man killed in shootout

by Michael Rubinkam

Let’s look at this headline again. This woman fought him off, and neither she, nor any of her offspring got killed. If you look up the articles and read the details, she made a mistake, which, if you read below and see how WIGGLY Pa considers the “PFAs” when it comes to what they mean, is almost understandable. But once the situation became clear, she took QUICK action to protect her children, get free, and call for help.

This is not, folks, how it often plays out. Who knows whether, God, fortune, or luck played a role, but we DO know this woman didn’t stop to debate, and she also didn’t panic and go dysfunctional. May I propose that this woman listening to her INSTINCTS and acting on them may have prevented a higher body count. LESSON ONE: Don’t jerk around with someone who has just crossed a boundary. Don’t second guess instinct. And (next time) don’t compromise one INCH on an existing protective or restraining order — it sends a mixed message, and could lead to this.

May I propose something else? I suggest that lawmakers and courts consider that women are people too, and smarten up to having us believe the fiction and play the slot games with any intimate partner who has been battering us in the home, or threatening to, etc. May I suggest that instead of — or in addition to — DISarming him, they somehow ARM her, and if she’s not trained how to do so, get her some professional responsible training. It could be mace, it could be pepper spray, but constitutionally, it could be a gun, too, at least in the home.

Given the options, she has hope, luck, prayer, and walking around the neighborhood with her instincts on alert, her antennae up, and then trying to also rebuild a life. “LIFE, LIBERTY, and PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS.” Now what was that first one again?

Detriment: May give a whole new picture of “motherhood” to “fatherhood” people who don’t believe women should be allowed to separate, do not have equal rights, and VAWA should go back to where it came from.

In this above statement, I omitted the comma between “fatherhood” people and who don’t believe. This is generous on my part, because I am conceding that there could be people all excited about and promoting fatherhood who DON’T believe these things. In fact, I don’t really believe this. I think that what the “fatherhood” movement is about is that the genetic / gender / biological composition of a family and household (one man, one woman, both married) is more important than the character or behavior of such families. I am not the only person who believes this. Some data is here (hover cursor for my comment. Note: This dates to 2002, almost 7 years ago. .http://www.canow.org/fam_report.pdf.

Now, when I married, I picked someone of the opposite gender, rather than someone of the same gender and, when it came to wanting children, either adoption or a sperm donor. This is probably because of how I like my sex, and the other versions didn’t concern me.

However, when I realized that my opposite-gender person’s main concern was my gender and household function ONLY, and not me as a person — and began physically punishing me for showing up as a person like him, and expecting to pursue some personal goals, not only the laundry/cleaning/nursing/f____ing role (in addition to supporting him in his business, and — if I wanted necessities — also working myself in and/or outside the home for pay) — I made a determination that behavior was the determinant, not gender, or a two-parent status. The MAIN reason I did this was because we had children, and it was a damn lousy role model they were being exposed to. The children were of my gender, and they were being taught how this one was somehow inferior and equipped with fewer rights, if any, and no boundaries or ability to say NO without taking retaliation for it. THAT’s a lousy role model, and he got himself evicted, not after several warnings.

I suppose you would like me to get to the story here, how THIS woman saved her life, her children’s life, but alas, not the pursuing policeman’s life, or her husband’s (although I lay that one as his responsibility — no one forced him to threaten his wife with a gun or kidnap his child, or place himself above a clear law he knew was in place upon him).

YATESVILLE, Pa. (AP) — Hobbled by a broken ankle, the estranged wife of a man killed in a shootout with Pennsylvania state troopers managed to fight him off as he threatened her with a gun before he kidnapped their 9-year-old son, the woman’s friend said.

The order of events is a little jumbled in the paragraph. The AP wanted it out fast, I guess, and so we get this:

A. Her ankle was broken
B. She was estranged from her husband
C. He was killed by PA state troopers in a shootout (i.e., he was shooting back).
D. 1. She fought him off 2. while he threatened her with a gun.
E. He kidnapped their 9 year old son.

Having been through a FEW of the events above (not including the shootout), let me put it, I suspect, chrono.

B. Cause of broken ankle — don’t know and probably not relevant.
D.2 He threatened her with a gun
D. 1 THIS MOM FOUGHT BACK.
E. THEN (having been fought off), he grabs their son and dashes off (probably in a car).
C. State troopers, apparently, caught up with him, and I’ll gol-dang bet he shot first. Predictably, they shot back.
Thank God the state troopers had some firearms training, so HE got killed, not his wife and not the son he kidnapped, this time.

First of all, let’s deal with the grammar dishonesty (gender bias?) with B. “She was estranged from her husband” which has an element of the truth, and distorts the actual context. This is such common press practice in domestic violence homicide (or incident) reporting:

LEGALLY, it appears he’d acted first, and she had responded with a “protection from abuse” order. Unless the news disagrees with the judge that is THE most relevant factor in the case, apart from this incident. It most certainly is prime factual, legal and emotional dynamic CONTEXT of the incident. “She was estranged” could’ve been, she got tired of his dirty socks around home, she wanted to pursue another affair, or he did; he refused to work OR was an alcoholic, she was bored, he was using drugs or alcohol, or they had other “irreconciliable differences.” “She was estranged” already must minimized the truth. If a protective order was in place, and these reporters are not aware enough yet that this produces LOTS of hot news leads in the form of crime reporting, they need to review the job descriptions — or their editors do. (To tell the truth, I didn’t notice this the first time through the story myself, although I have always thought it an odd phrase).

B. THEY were estranged. or, better,

B. “In _____ (date) (or how recent), she obtained a PFA (say it: “protection from abuse“) order (in what court, or county), forcing him to leave the family home.

It is so typical of abusers, abuser enablers, and for that matter, the bulk of the family law system, to IGNORE THE ACTIONS and TALK ABOUT WHO “WAS” WHAT RATHER THAN WHO “DID” WHAT. IT”S PSYCHOLOGY NOT EVIDENCE. THIS IS NO ACCIDENT!

From the 2002 California Family Court Report (link above): (under “Loss of Due Process”)

A. Lack of procedural and evidentiary due process,since the Family Code was

separated from the Code of Civil Procedure and the Evidence Code in

1992.

Alas (and the emphasis of other articles on this event) — – Mad Dad was not in a compromise mood, and shot at responding officers. Terribly, he got a cop, too. Again — and these officers WERE brave, and they DID stop a kidnapping in process.

That’s about a recipe for suicide by cop. Whether or not he had thought THIS far ahead, one thing is clear: He’d pre-meditated far enough ahead to bring a gun and point it at his wife.

I experienced a decade of being exceedingly afraid of my husband in the home, being traumatized, and eventually being sure enough (because he talked about it often enough, fantasizing about this, and telling me, so, or otherwise bringing it up casually in conversation: “I’ll just have to kill you.” At this time, both our children were under 8 years old.) This has caused economic devastation upon me, my daughters, and people associated with both him, and us. It has wasted taxpayer funds year after year (in family law, where our case shouldn’t have been at the time) and taken almost 20 years of the prime working years of my life and trashed them repeatedly, under threats, stalkings, intimidations, sudden appearances at my home, and in general, one hell of a mess. He is still only working part-time, if that, doesn’t pay taxes (I don’t because I don’t earn enough), he is not financially independent yet and, because of this and unfortunately, neither am I. Our state is broke (supposedly) which is headline news, and is getting people very short-tempered in general.

I wonder, and I DO reflect — SUPPOSE I HAD FOUGHT BACK, AND NOT ONLY THAT, THREATENED BACK: IF YOU EVER DO THIS AGAIN, YOU’LL BE MISSING A BODY PART. OR DEAD! And then dropped everything until I had learned self defense.

Or, I had told been less committed to my marriage vows, and dumped his ass out on the street — in other words, brought it to a head earlier. WHY did I not do that? (a number of reasons: #1. VAWA and awareness of DV laws was not commonplace. #2. I’d never had a similar experience where I had to set a boundary with a violent man before, and wasn’t acquainted personally with such situations. #3. self-defense and handling a gun is not a typical part of the public school education, and not exactly promoted, as in, exercising 2nd Amendment rights, in general. We are not hunting our food, but buying it, for the most part (or growing it). I was not raised in urban areas, where awareness of guns and gun violence was commonplace, but in more rural; people shot deer, or sometimes squirrels, not people! I also wasn’t raised on TV.

School rewards taking orders and obeying rules, at least theoretically.

And that’s not “feminine” behavior.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

WHAT IF MEN UNDERSTOOD – – – REALLY UNDERSTOOD – – – THAT EVEN WITHIN A RELATIONSHIP, A SMACK WILL BE SMACKED, BACK, HARDER, BECAUSE IT’S SO OUT OF ORDER? WHAT IF WOMEN WEREN’T SO DESPERATE TO SURVIVE ECONOMICALLY, OR FOR SEXUAL ATTENTION, OR TO HAVE A MAN ON THE ARM, THAT NONE OF THEM COMPROMISED?

WOULD THERE STILL BE FAMILIES AS WE KNOW THEM NOW?

Maybe the fatherhood guys are “right.” Maybe (from that perspective) if men are not needed to provide for and protect women,and defend them from other suitors, stalkers, or rapists, or to help them, particularly when they are more vulnerable, pregnant and raising young kids, the differences between the sexes (as to functions in life) would so blur, that, well, the drive to achieve and provide would diminish, the wheels of the economy would crumble (and a lot of faith institutions also), and life just wouldn’t have that same glow, or afterglow.

Without the primal urge, there would be no skyscrapers (9/11?) or cathedrals, and no empires, multi-national or otherwise. Maybe. life just wouldn’t have that zest and drama. Newspapers would need to find other ways to sell the products, if there weren’t crises to report.

Well, that’s a larger topic. But it seems a natural question: If the nuclear family ain’t what protects, and provides for its young, the only alternative is for equality of income. NOW, Papa Obama and the majority of Head Start, Zero to Five, Administration for Families and Children, (sorry sir to pick on you, this wasn’t your idea to start with) might be out of work. ONLY if the ONLY way to produce income is a “job” that MUST be done outside the home, ONLY then is it essential to have the other functions of raising a family: care, daytime feeding, and education — to be done by someone else, institutionally.

However the people so vigorously promoting this solution ONLY (and highly suspicious of, say, the homeschooling option which is a lot more fluid, lets mothers network and find each other’s long suits, collaborate locally to find the best teachers (including some of each other, as well as hired professionals), and fire the lousy ones — now THAT’S a plus) and actually have a better understanding of who their children are, and possibly better relationships with them, not rigidly defined ones) — these people — and I coudl show you, or you could look for yourself — are THEMSELVES either inheriting wealth, or have sufficient assets to go fund ggovernment policy, publicize and drive various programs through and teach THEIR young how to own businesses and produce passive cash flow, themselves.

Then who would work in the businesses they own? There has to be a steady population — and the majority of the population — that does NOT know how to live independently from the government, or the “employee” situation — or life would, well, it just wouldn’t work right. Who would work the factories, produce the many, many terrific products we enjoy in this country, the material prosperity, the varities of fast foods (and agencies pronouncing that fast foods are bad for you), and all that?

(Along with the domestic violence kidnappings, suicides by cop, traumatized kids, and sometimes dead people, that go along with when this doesn’t work out so well…..).

Well, that dialogue is what I get for thinking. It’s Monday night quarterbacking, I guess, “what-if” scenarios. I cannot turn back the clock in my own case. The fact is, if I hadn’t been who I was, probably the genetic and particular DNA of my two wonderful daughters (who are probably not reading this, yet), and with whom I am NOT spending any more time, would not have been born. I have already determined (and she’s spoken with me recently) that woman number two was targeted for a certain gullibility and in a certain venue, for use to get the kids away from me. He’s out on the loose again, troubling me, because I’ve been contacted, and her, because of what that indicates.

HOWEVER, the rest of this post, below, shows how the local Women’s Resource Agency describes why women should keep coming, keep asking for “PFA” orders and keep playing the odds, because, it’s after all, only about ONE out of THREE cases that violates these orders, and “NOT ALL” do “WHAT HE DID.”

Well, in school, 66% is not a passing grade. Last I heard, 70% was. We are talking 66% success rate when the other 33% (add your decimal points later) might get killed and result in this. We’re not talking about graduating from high school, but living out a normal lifespan, and not in terror, trauma, or having to before a child is ten, witness a homicide. Or two. Or being kidnapped. About officers NOT having to make that sacrifice, and THEIR children lose a Daddy also. How is THAT “promoting responsible fatherhood.”

I think that the time of restraining orders may have passed, and that we probably need to focus on both attitudes, cultural values and self-defense techniques (including weapons if necessary) that make it ABSOLUTELY clear that any such violation of a personal boundary in the form of a HIT will be met with equal, and to make a point, slightly greater responding force to emphasize the unacceptability of it.

I think local communities will have to figure out processes, not “states” they wish to achieve. And this requires being realistic about restraining order and a valid understanding of what abuse IS.

I have one: ABUSE is violating personal boundaries (and, most time, state criminal laws) in order to establish a “giving orders” situation between what should be intimate partners. As such, it qualifies as “two-year-old” behavior and should result in the adult who has regressed to it, and thinks that 2009 is, in fact, closer to 1920 (when women finally got the vote) should be treated like the two-year-old mentality of, the world should conform to you when you don’t like it, without your submitting to some process of negotiation, compromise, or humility. I would like to add that, as I recall this, I always wondered why our daughters didn’t go through the famous “Terrible Twos” {is this an Americdan term only? I don’t know…} rebellious stages. I remember this at the time also. It could be that we weren’t dumping them off in daycare, where they needed more attention, oir it just possibly could’ve been that we had a much larger Terrible Two in the home, in the form of their father, and they knew this.

Only when it’s UNacceptable throughout society to beat women, and terrorize anyone, will this stop. The only acceptable reasons for doing anything like this in defense of life’s essentials — and these do not include maintaining a status quo in which the abuser’s world is perfect, and his ego cannot handle rejection, the need to apologize, or occasional value conflicts. The heart of any really good intimate relationship would do real well to closely resemble what’s written in the Declaration of Independence and the Bill of Rights, which most of us (and our legislators) have apparently forgotten.

I happen to be a Christian, and my faith tells me about when this will, and will not happen. I have had to often re-evaluate the duality (us/them) and domination (Christ came once and was humbled/crucified voluntarily, but will return in authority as king and by force put down all rebellion, bringing in world peace), and I assure you, in the many, MANY years I have been around and working (through music) in several faith institutions, the music is terrific, but within white (in particular, but not only) Protestantism, nondenominational especially, equality of women is “anathema” and these places are producing wife-beaters and wife-killers. They do not communally or prominently acknowledge the laws of the land in their hearts, and many (those who do not ordain women, or and hate even the concept of them in leadership, let alone of gays, or lesbians) , despite sometimes sheltering a battered woman, or helping her (i’ve been helped a few times recently), they will NOT stop sheltering the doctines and attitudes that produce more batterred women, and more overentitled men. this is behind the “fatherhood” movement, and it produces a form of social schizophrenia, in which we have a public school system where “God” is not allowed, or prayer, yet public policy where “faith-based” advice and policies are promoted. Well, which is it, folks?

That’s all the psycho- social-analysis for this post. What’s below (written earlier) relates more directly to this particular domestic violence double-homicide, kidnapping, assault, and tragedy which began with “she was estranged,” and a look at the neighborhood response.

What probably kept that woman and her children alive was her willingness to fight back. What put her at risk was compromising the existing restraining order (including drop off at curb), and (possibly) her not having the means or intent to, at ALL times since it was issued, NEVER compromise it AT ALL. ONE means might be for her husband to have understand that she understood her 2nd Amendment right to self-defense, and having it in the home, AND her willingness and intent to act on it, if even 3 yards of a restraining order was violated. This sends a clear message, and would put that man back in a place to reconsider whether he wants to test the limits, or can talk or plan, or manipulate his way out of obeying that order.

The courts need to do more to communicate this necessity to women who have just separated. They need to understand that NOW, it’s OK to take a personally aggressive stance and back it up with a willingness to act if boundaries are violated. That IS, after all, WHY the “United States of America” is no longer a British colony, or any other colony (so far), and we might do well to keep communicating this principle to our young, boy and girl alike. Not to belabor the point, but our schools absolutely do NOT, do this at this point, and I say, intentionally so. You can’t “manage” people so well who understand their self-worth.

However Susan Autenreith may have been raised, at the crucial time, she found something within herself to say No, and stand up to this. Having made a mistake, she didn’t condemn herself or try to talk out of the situation. Gun meant FIGHT BACK, YELL DIRECTIONS TO HE KIDS, & CALL FOR HELP.

How Logical Is This?

~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

About that MOM?

Let’s go chrono, OK?

Not all (female) readers have been through the process of, say,

(1) childbirth,

(2) being assaulted, threatened, intimidated, battered, and in short abused, or other situations which tell you “Danger! Danger!,”

(3) filing and getting a PFA (domestic violence restraining, or etc.) order with kickout, indicating “Danger! Danger!” to all and “STAY AWAY!” to Dad, (and, you can’t buy guns, either, or own them), and then

(4) IMMEDIATELY after these at least actions (applying for a temporary, filing with judge, getting it signed, serving the husband (which then in effect throws him out of the house in some manner), going to court for a hearing to have it made permanent, having it made “permanent” (i.e., facing the ex in that court hearing), and meanwhile attempting to explain this to one’s children in terms they can understand why he can’t live here anymore, then — with a restraining order in effect — typically the NEXT stop is the mediator who will then proceed to act as though there wasn’t really, any serious domestic violence (other than, meetings may be separate) and say, “OK, so long as it’s peaceful communications around the children” and then design some visitation plan any other divorcing couple might have, even the most amicable divorces. Which appears to have happened in this place.

In 1992, Jack Straton, Ph.D. (NOMAS: National Org. of Men Against Sexism) recommended a cooling off period.

So far, no one has figured this out, evidently.

(5) Agreeing, after this, to a custody/visitation exchange plan which basically has a split personality:

Hey, he was so dangerous, you had to get a judge to tell him to stay away, and order no weapons in the home, BUT . . . .. BUT . . . . . it’s OK to give this same, by now pretty distraught or indignant/upset man access to the fruit of his loins, regularly . . . . After all, what about a child’s right to bond with both parents?

This, I say, gives the man, the woman, and the children a mixed message. I have also learned (the hard way) since, the courts ALSO are getting contradictory messages (and funding) about these matters. IS domestic violence a crime, or not a crime?

And so we get cases like the Autenreiths, where Dad didn’t LIKE having that protective order in place, and made this clear with a 9mm. His girlfriend helped him get a gun. Again, his girlfriend.

WHICH BRINGS UP THIS POINT: Telling a man to not own weapons, and get rid of any he does own, doesn’t prevent him — in the least — from grabbing one from a friend who has one (or in this case, a girlfriend buying one for him. I believe this is called a straw purchase, and laws exist to address this, but still, it points out that generally there is a way around the law for those who intend to find one).

(How long were they separated? How hard is it for a man with a plan to get around a piece of paper?)

in order to STOP the cycle of abuse which, without intervention, generally does one thing — escalate, until someone is killed, or more than one,

WHAT ARE THE ODDS? HOW WELL DO YOU KNOW THAT MAN? HOW WILL HE RESPOND TO THE PFA?

=======

HERE IS THE RESPONSE REGARDING “PFA’S” TO THIS PARTICULAR ASSAULT, BATTERY, CHILD-KIDNAPPING, THREATS, CAR CHASE AND DOUBLE-HOMICIDE. I HAVE EMPHASIZED ANY AREAS THAT SHOW UNCERTAINTY, LOOPHOLES FOR DANGER:

WOMEN’S RESOURCES OF MONROE COUNTY (PA): PFA’s WORK IN MOST CASES

By Andrew Scott

Pocono Record June 12, 2009

A protection-from-abuse order [“”PFA”] may be just a piece of paper unable to stop the likes of Daniel Autenrieth, the Northampton County man who threatened his wife at gunpoint, kidnapped their son and led police on a high-speed chase that ended in a fatal shootout in Tobyhanna.

{To review: PFA, then:

DEAD PEOPLE — 2, OFFICER, MAN
WOUNDED — 1, OFFICER
VERY TRAUMATIZED — 9 YEAR OLD SON, MOM, OTHER KIDS}}

The fact remains that most people with PFAs filed against them comply with those court orders and don’t do what Autenrieth did. So although PFAs aren’t absolutely guaranteed to stop someone who’s unbalanced or really intent on doing harm, people who are being physically abused or feel threatened with physical harm in relationships still should apply for PFAs.

That was the message at a Thursday press conference at Women’s Resources of Monroe County in Delaware Water Gap. Women’s Resources is part of the Pennsylvania Coalition Against Domestic Violence, which provides a network of advocacy, legal, counseling, medical and other support services for domestic violence victims.

. . .

In Pennsylvania, PFA violators can face up to six months in county jail and fines of up to $1,000, depending on the severity of the violation, said Wendy Bentzoni, a detective with the Monroe County District Attorney’s Office.

If a woman requests a PFA against her husband and he consents to the order’s terms

Being evicted from the home he/she shares with the plaintiff/victim and having no contact with that person.
Being evicted, but being allowed to have contact.
Being allowed to stay in the home as long as there is no physical abuse or threat of physical abuse.

In Pennsylvania, a PFA can be in effect for any length of time up to three years, depending on what a judge rules or what the parties involved consent to in each individual case. If the defendant doesn’t violate the PFA, the order simply expires when its time is up.

Of the 450 PFAs granted in Monroe County last year, more than 125 were violated by defendants, Bentzoni said.

{{OK, Let’s look at that. Suppose it was 150. 150 violated out of 450 is 1 out of 3. That means for every 2 that WERE kept (as far as they know — by whether or not a violation was reported or not) 1 was not. How do you like them odds? Your PFA has a 33.33% of being violated (in which case, see above for potential risk/fallout).

In some cases, getting a PFA filed against an abuser can worsen the victim’s situation because the abuser sees it as the victim trying to take power away from the abuser{{WHICH IT IS INCIDENTALLY}}, she said. Desperate to retain that power over the victim, the abuser might become even more dangerous.

“Against someone with no fear of the law or jail, a PFA might not be the best action to take,” Kessler said. “In that case, we explore other options with the victim. The goal is to get the victim out of a vulnerable position.”

If the abuser is the sole breadwinner for the victim and their children, fear of losing the abuser’s financial support also might deter the victim from applying for a PFA, Kessler said.

Well, I know in my case it sure delayed getting one. Often economic abuse can precede physical.

Economic abuse can precedes and enables the physical AND IS PRE-MEDITATED. If the targeted person can’t afford to get away, or see how they could conceivably do so, they will take their chances staying, possibly. What a great choice — homelessness or increasing domestic abuse.

So, it seems to me if we want a less violent world, the most sensible thing would be focus on teaching children and young people how to become economically independent. In a wonderful contradiction of intent, we DON’T! The entire public schools system in the U.S.A., for the most part, consists of teaching children how to be submissive and take orders, leave the thinking up to the experts, who will grade them, and prepare them for this: College, and Jobs. Not, College and BUSINESSES. Or College, and understanding the economic principles that would help them become business owners, investors, cash-stream producers, foundation producers, and independent thinkers. How hypocritical.

And that includes independent thinking about how to survive financially should they choose to have children, or should they not choose to have children, but set up housekeeping (and sleeping) with a partner that might become sick, injured, or — face it – incarcerated. They should not have to go nurse off Dad, or Mom, or Big Brother the Welfare State, in this case. The goal should NOT be lifetime jobs, but lifetime progression towards financial independence. They cannot do this if they aren’t studying people who have accomplished this, and the basic principles of wealth.

We should also teach them not to let any partner or potential partner disarm them economically — whether it be job, or bank account, or credit, or access to transportation etc. That any such action is aggression, and dangerous to their welfare, creating an artificial co-dependence. They should know this going into relationships.

Now right there, we have a SERIOUS problems. Many world religions don’t accept this, and are not likely to.

Well, maybe they should, in the US, then lose their tax-exempt status. Believe me, I’ve thought of it. Because if they are contributing to the climate of “It’s OK to dominate a woman by any means (or weapon) that comes to hand, because it makes you more of a man,” then they should have to fork over the taxes that society might need to take care of the resulting mess.

And I’ll tell you another “secret” (not a real secret) — one I’ve been thinking about more recently. The majority of these institutions are in a co-dependent and domination relationship within their own ranks. If they didn’t dominate and under-educate them on their own sacred scripts (men and women alike), in the US, at least, many people would not be so dependent on spiritual, social, and emotional nourishment on the weekends and maybe ONE weekday. But that is another post, and probably, blog.

We ought to teach, besides, reading math writing, sport and the arts (to put it roughly) the PROCESSES and VALUES OF:

Self-sufficiency, Self-defense, and self-discipline, to the point of in-depth excellence and mastery in one primary area. With that I believe will come sufficient self-esteem not to enter into too many co-dependent relationships.

I recommend reading John Taylor Gatto’s short book called Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling, in which he says, plainly, that the seven lessons he, as a teacher (and at the time NY State Teacher of the Year” actually is teaching is not “relevance” and “interrelationship” of subjects, but the exact opposite. Specifically, in order from the chapter: “The Seven Lesson Schoolteacher,” they are:

CONFUSION
CLASS POSITION
INDIFFERENCE
EMOTIONAL DEPENDENCY
INTELLECTUAL DEPENDENCY
PROVISIONAL SELF-ESTEEM
ONE CAN’T HIDE.

The next chapter is called the “psychopathic school” after which he details his efforts of getting a little girl who read beautifully out of a class of bad readers. The girl (reading aloud beautifully) tells him how the administration had explained to her mother that she was, in reality, a “bad reader who had fantasies of being a better reader than she was.” Then, the author relates how the principal tried the same thing on him: how was he, a substitute to know whether or not this child could read.

MY EXPERIENCE: This actually is at the heart of the educational AND the family law system of “experts.” My “sin” was homeschooling the children, and having fantasies (as do many single mothers leaving abuse) that we could make a sound decision on behalf of our sons and daughter, after we’d made just about the soundest one around — LEAVING the situation!

Consider this:

Our form of compulsory schooling was an invention of the State of Massachusetts around 1850. It was resisted — with guns — by about 80% of the Massachusetts population, the last outpost being Barnstable on Cape Cod not surrendering its children until the area was seized by militia and children marched to school under guard. (p. 25,

There is more, but as I review those 7 lessons above, I can’t help thinking about the uncommon similarities between abuse — even it’s definitions — and the family law system, as well as the concept of using another abusive system to handle abuse by one person towards another in the presence of children.

Is ALL conflict bad? No, conflict involving true self-defense, or boundary violations.

Is marriage, or an “intimate partner relationship,” a person as property contract? A relationship as property contract? I believe the law calls it a FIDUCIARY relationship. As such, no one has a right to commit what in other context would be a crime, to protect loss of contact with this former sexual partner, parent of one’s children, children, or the breakdown of a relationship.

WHEN IT GETS TO THE POINT OF PFAs and RESTRAINING ORDERS, the enforcement should be thorough, immediate, clear, and strong. The dialogue above illustrates why, in practice, it ain’t. SO the conflicts go on, and escalate.

I have taught lots of children (and adults) in lots of venues and classrooms, and non-class situations. There are always rules ,and in-progress negotiation about common standards, there is always a dynamic flexibility within the group, there is the matter of consensus and critical mass.

The superb choir that got me going into music was about 40 in number, and we stood in mixed quartets, holding our own parts, produced records, soloists, and in general moved mountains and kicked butt musically. It was powerful stuff. We rehearsed almost daily and worked to pay for some of our own needs (including uniforms, painting the room, and going to conferences). We associated after school (and sometimes before) and in other venues than school; we ate, played, and attended concerts together.

Since then, I have sung in (and sometimes directed) choirs numbering from approximately 12 up to over 100. The ideal size (and one of the best choirs I was in) was about 18, or very maximum 20, if they were professionals and unified. I have had a little choir of only 11 do amazing things, because it was small enough to be responsive.

I have always thought it odd that the top ensembles are generally smaller than a typical public school classroom, and many of them not much larger than a large family, with a cousin or two. It brings out the best when there is a unified goal that is reasonable (but still stretching limits) to the people involved. The best choirs also were VOLUNTARY, not compulsory. They chose challenging music (to keep the participants growing) but always taking into account that the audience might not feel so esoteric in general. They mixed and matched, but they HAD to set a fairly high standard technically and musically – or in portrayal.

How does this relate to the Wife who Fought Back?

The system they were ensared in was too large, and is ruling and prognosticating by “the odds.” MOST people (translation: men) do not violate the PFAs, after all, just over 125 out of 450 did in this particular area. Therefore, the women should keep on coming, because what else could they do? It MIGHT not result in this, after all, NOT ALL men do what Mr. Autenreith did.

And we have this growing crisis of “fatherlessness”? That’s a fatherless family, and it just made a peace officer’s kids fatherless, too. I wonder what kind of father the nine-year old will make, should he become one.

I think the doctrine is becoming a little self-defeating, if not downright dangerous. I mean, this is all about the children, right? It’s all because children in single-parent families are at risk.

Well, yeah, with some vigilantes running around the place . . . . . However, if she’d been armed and determined…

I think we (Responsible Citizens) need to take a serious look at the Seven-Lesson Schoolteacher and ask, is this what we are willing to be taught, as adults, by our elected officials? I mean, the same values ARE shared, it is the “Hidden Currriculum” overall, I’d say. And it’s downright un-American, including “parenting classes.” The government already had a shot at the majority of the children in this country, through the public school system. If it were my kids, and the teachers failed, I’d go find me a new teacher and system.

OH, I FORGOT TO MENTION — I DID. AND MY CHILDREN WERE STOLEN ON AN OVERNIGHT VISITATION (UNSUPERVISED) PRECISELY BECAUSE I DID. AND PUT BACK IN THE SYSTEM, BECAUSE THEIR MAMA HAD ALREADY FIGURED OUT THAT THE 7 LESSONS WERE BOGUS.

This is a system that brooks no competitors. It allows some, but scoops up any stragglers, and family law is a great place to find them, and weaken them for the snatch.

Written by Let's Get Honest|She Looks It Up

July 2, 2009 at 6:10 PM

Target Population:	Married and Unmarried persons in California, ages 15 and older, of all racial, cultural and economic backgrounds
Federal Award Amount:	$2,342,080/year
Program Name:	California Healthy Marriages Coalition
Project Period:	9/30/2006 - 9/29/2011

93.010: Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	$128,610,003
98.001: USAID Foreign Assistance for Programs Overseas	$11,058,644
93.279: Drug Abuse and Addiction Research Programs	$9,561,182
93.995: Adolescent Family Life_Demonstration Projects	$8,064,374
93.273: Alcohol Research Programs	$6,222,97

FAMILY HEALTH INTERNATIONAL (FHI)	$3,593,286
SCRIPPS RESEARCH INSTITUTE	$2,551,682
PROGRAM FOR APPROPRIATE TECHNOLOGY IN HEALTH	$2,233,162
HERITAGE COMMUNITY SERVICES INC	$2,000,000
BROWN UNIVERSITY	$1,672,760
POPULATION COUNCIL INC	$1,613,000
PATH	$1,500,000
NEUROBEHAVIORAL RESEARCH INC	$1,466,239
NEW HOPE CENTER INC	$1,399,907
CENTER FOR SELF-SUFFICIENCY, INC.	$1,399,300

2009	Columbus Hospital	NJ	COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	2	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	BERNADETTE VISSANI	$- 739,820
2009	METRO ATLANTA YOUTH FOR CHRIST, INC	GA	COMMUNITY-BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	3	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	CINDY MILLER	$ 300,186
2009	Saint Michael`s Medical Center, Inc	NJ	COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	1	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	BERNADETTE VISSANI	$ 677,551
2008	A WOMAN`S PLACE MINISTRIES, INC.	FL	ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	1	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	MICHAEL LAYTON	$ 600,000
2008	A WOMENS CONCERN, INC.	MA	HEALTHY FUTURES ABSTINENCE EDUCATION INITIATIVE	3	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	ELIZABETH SNYDER	$ 600,000
2008	ABSTINENCE & MARRIAGE EDUCATION PARTNERSHIP	IL	COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	1	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	SCOTT PHELPS	$ 512,500
2008	ABSTINENCE EDUCATION CONSULTANTS,INC.	KS	COMMUNITY-BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	1	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	LOIS THEIS	$ 600,000
2008	ABSTINENCE TIL MARRIAGE EDUCATION	OH	COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	3	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	CATHERINE E WOOD	$ 600,000
2008	AIDS RESOURCE CENTER OF WISCONSIN, INC	WI	COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	1	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	SCOTT STOKES	$ 600,000
2008	ALPHA CENTER	SD	COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	1	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	KIMBERLY MARTINEZ	$ 600,000
2008	ALTERNATIVE COMMUNITY DEVELOPMENT SERVICES	TX	COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	1	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	SHARI L CARROLL	$ 454,922
2008	ARIZONA MEXICO BORDER HEALTH FOUNDATION	AZ	COMMUNITY BASED ABSTINENCE EDUCATION	1	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	ALBERT MORENO	$ 550,000
2008	AWARE, INC.	WA	WASHINGTON STATE: COMMUNITY-BASED ABSTINENCE UNTIL MARRIAGE PROJECT	1	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	JAMES N GRENFELL	$ 499,849
2008	About Our Kids, Inc.	MO	STRATEGIES FOR ABSTINENCE AND VIRTUE EDUCATION (SAVE)	2	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	ALICIA HUMES	$ 600,000
2008	Abstinence the Better Choice, Inc.	OH	ABSTINENCE THE BETTER CHOICE	3	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	CHERYL BIDDLE	$ 600,000
2008	Americans for a Better Tomorrow, Inc.	AZ	POWER FITNESS ABSTINENCE PROGRAM- TEACHING YOUTH AGES 12 THROUGH 18 THE SOCIAL, PSYCHOLOGI	3	Community-Based Abstinence Education (CBAE)	DISCRETIONARY	EVA GODDARD	$ 600,000

FY	Award Number	Budget Year of Support	Agency	Award Code	Action Issue Date	Amount This Action
2008	90FE0037	3	ACF	0	09-14-2008	$550,000.00
Award Subtotal:						$550,000.00

Archive for the ‘public education’ Category

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I rest my case on “certifiably insane protection orders”. . . .

This article is a quiz (answers below). Do this:

The children are our future. Now, Where’s that Valium?

QUIZ ANSWERS (mine) BELOW: (I interspersed A & B as dialogue)

NOW — figure out this timeline if you can:

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE RESOURCES IN KANSAS:

Domestic Violence

“FATHERHOOD IN KANSAS (google, results 124,000)

ACCESS VISITATION IN KANSAS:

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Our Mission

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This voice from the past (1989 to 2009 = 20 years!) —

1992

Have a nice weekend. Again, I’d rather see a sermon than hear one any day.

While this essay is music (the voice of logic, of common sense truth) to my ears, but it’s not a tune many people like these days. Because it actually addresses the impact of role-modeling and personal responsibility upon the next generation.

This was written Pre-VAWA and Pre-National Fatherhood Inititative, which one theme of this blog has been showing what these cost, and how they attempt to cancel each other out.

Wife Abuse and Child Custody and Visitation by the Abuser,

Speaking personally, the exchanges where were the problems occurred in our case. I asked (for YEARS) for help with this, and got none. Then finally on an overnight, I stopped seeing my daughters again.

Voices from the even further past, still valid today:

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AUGUST 26, 2009

We are allowed to give birth, but too often, not to also speak.

“Let us Now Praise Famous Men“

August 26, 2009

WHO MOURNS THESE?

Deborah Ross (51) and Ersie Charles Everette (58)

2009/2008 Torres, Catalina (44) & Eustacio (41), Sgt. Paul Starzyk

2008 account “Details emerge in Martinez triple shooting:

Elnora Caldwell, 46

She asked for protection

Recovery of Nina’s body and sentencing

Anastasia Melnitchenko, 22, unmarried, No asylum in America

Body-in-trunk suspect got lots of counseling

‘Doing satisfactorily’ after 6 months of weekly sessions

Taking matters into their own hand; two brothers kill widow & her relatives:

Winta Mehari, 28; her brother Yonas Mehari, 17;

and their mother, 50-year-old Regbe Bahrengasi

Kennedy’s Battle With Cancer Lost

Jeremiah 17

I saw a charming, Robert-Redford smile, and I thought about Chappaquiddick,

MichaelMoore.com Commemoration

Kennedy, Youngest Kennedy Brother, Led Political Dynasty in Wake of Tragedy

The Only One Left

Kennedy Curse: Political Power, Personal Tragedy

Kennedy’s Battle With Cancer Lost

With all due respect, we do not need any more royalty in this country. We need to set our sites on something invisible, something written, but something of principle, that unites us. Our leaders need to stick to that, and out of respect to OURSELVES ,we should demand that.

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Set this Press Release to the “SPIN” Cycle:

Yes, alas, ’tis true. . ..

Notice anything missing from the logo there?

Top 10 Recipients

And show someone else. OK?

Anyhow, here they are: the helpers, last year (2008):

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AMBER ALERT ISSUED FOR 2-MONTH-OLD BOY TAKEN BY FATHER

BABY DAVION RETURNED:

Not yet found:

Amber Alert Ends, Girl Still Missing

Girl’s Mother Found Dead In KC Home

Vehicle Missing

More Info

Massachusetts, 6 month old, suicide/murder threats from Father

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Short Unique Words (Acronyms, or even EIN#s) Work Better than Phrases. I don’t always tag & quit using “categories.”

ARCHIVES | Posts only (March 2009ff, pick a month). For Pages, see my Tables of Contents, & (as of its date published) Sticky Post ’58 Essays.’

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**Winta Mehari, 28; her brother Yonas Mehari, 17;**