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“Strong Field Project” caters to DV industry’s networks, enabled by ?? “Three Cities that Rule the World”

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This post to be read alongside a page added to the other blog, which explains the “Strong Field Project” reference.

Strengthening leaders, organizations, and networks to build a stronger domestic violence field“*

*What does doing THAT have to do with ending domestic violence, pray tell?

Three Cities that Rule the World,” Including the Ever-expanding but Centralized DV Field

(How interesting that a visitor today from “City of London” showed on Feedjit….)

That article was posted at http://forum.prisonplanet.com/index.php?topic=106799.0 by user  May 21, 2009.


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We think in terms of within our state (or perhaps as far as the federal level) when seeking justice from the bottom up.  However, the top down doesn’t think that way at all — and from what I can see these days, it doesn’t think in terms of the US Constitution either.  Consider nonprofit associations that help run our justice system, including particularly the one I blog on….

  • The AFCC is definitely international (Australia, Canada, UK, . . . . . .), as is the associated CRC (Children’s Rights Council).  Well custody disputes sometimes are international; sh*t happens.
  • International Institute for Conflict Prevention & Resolution > Home

    http://www.cpradr.org/  The CPR Institute is an independent, nonprofit think tank that promotes innovation in commercial dispute prevention and resolution. By harnessing the collective 

this nonprofit (founded 1979) is also listed on the New York State

International Institute for Conflict Prevention & Resolution

Founded in 1979, the International Institute for Conflict Prevention & Resolution—an alliance of global corporations, law firms, legal academics and selected public institutions—serves as a multinational resource for avoidance, management and resolution of business-related and other disputes. Its site offers, among other things, project descriptions, publications, videotapes and training materials, and also discusses alternative dispute resolution in a variety of industry and practice areas.

I don’t have a problem with this, except when it comes to the family law courts handling criminal behavior involving physical assault and battery, or child molestation.  That’s where the line should’ve been drawn, yet intentionally wasn’t.  This crowd continues to promote dispute resolution for almost everyone, and the profession, including those that go on (as retired judges, as psychologists, or as attorneys, presumably).  I am working on a separate post (other blog), and have, yes, found it sponsoring work with AFCC, among plenty of other places; it has plenty of funding to go around for these grants, too.   The board members of this represent a host of major (multinational) corporations, and its chair (a Judge, or retired judge) formerly worked for the FBI and the CIA, which I think at least should catch someone’s attention.
Then Thomas J. Stipanovich stepped down from this nonprofit to run the Straus Institute of Dispute Resolution at Pepperdine, in Malibu, California.  In looking at this, and the related school of law, I couldn’t help but notice the close connection to London, and after this, conferences involving THE top justice of England and Wales in concert with a justice at the Supreme level in Belgium as well.
How in the world could we expect such globetrotters to see the safety element when it comes to dispute resolution in the family law arena?  Is that an unreasonable mountain to scale, or train to (somehow) hop — catching up with this global elite and saying STOP IT, DAMNIT!

. . .

The “Strong Field Project” is just another sapling off the DV as industry Tree, and not the main point here (see first link, above).  My point is, were it not for centralized wealth — and alongside that wealth, centralized decision-making (taxation without representation)  these things would not exist.  And so long as our medium of exchange is “fiat money” owned by private bankers, who lend to the U.S. Treasury at interest dumped upon the entire US Population, while talks about “stimulating the economy” “balancing the budget” etc. continue to roil the electorate — they rule that world, and it’s true — they do.

Maybe Jesus was right, in the wilderness -it takes one to know one and maybe whoever wrote the gospels of Matthew and Luke, describing his temptation, were absolutely correct (Mark, probably earlier than either, skims over the time in the wilderness).  As it goes in Matthew 4 (KJV), three temptations, which I’ll summarize as:  Do Magic Tricks (Stones into bread) to satisfy his empty stomach; Suicide (jump off the temple to test God’s safety net), and finally, Sellout (bow down, and be receive the kingdoms (plural) of the world, with their glory).

1Then was Jesus led up of the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted of the devil. 2And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights, he was afterward an hungred. 3And when the tempter came to him, he said, If thou be the Son of God, command that these stones be made bread4But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.5Then the devil taketh him up into the holy city, and setteth him on a pinnacle of the temple,

6And saith unto him, If thou be the Son of God, cast thyself down: for it is written, He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone.

7Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.

8Again, the devil taketh him up into an exceeding high mountain, and sheweth him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them; 9And saith unto him, All these things will I give thee, if thou wilt fall down and worship me10Then saith Jesus unto him, Get thee hence, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve. 11Then the devil leaveth him, and, behold, angels came and ministered unto him.

Luke 4 has it in a different order (suicide last, after getting Jesus’ worship fails), and adds detail on how the devil got the power over the entire world:

5And the devil, taking him up into an high mountain, shewed unto him all the kingdoms of the world in a moment of time. 6And the devil said unto him, All this power will I give thee, and the glory of them: for that is delivered unto me; and to whomsoever I will I give it. 7If thou therefore wilt worship me, all shall be thine. 8And Jesus answered and said unto him, Get thee behind me, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve.

“Power and Glory are mine,” boasts the devil.  “I have the kingdoms of this world.”  Well, were kingdoms around when this was written?  “And I say who gets them, and who does not get them; I am the boss.”  

It seems to hold true today, doesn’t it?  Only different terminology is used.  For example, the word “GRANT.”  A grant is a gift, but with the gift goes a little piece of the recipient’s independence in the form of strings attached — does it serve a particular agenda set by the grantOR?  Absolutely!  This is basically the buying and selling of kingdoms, power, and etc.   Whatever happens within them, that’s the umbrella over them.

Characterizing this as coming from “the devil” (invisible spiritual influence), i.e. bad — well, is this type of influence bad, and is it often exercised in hidden (invisible) ways?  I’d say, yes…..

Looking at these “kingdoms of the world” (as opposed to looking at, for example, “Nature” and things that grow, against the zoology, biology, anatomy, astromony,etc. that show more and more amazing details) I have to agree, that the greater the power, the greater the damage.  And that the lifeblood/energy is being sucked out of the some sectors of the world, along with money, and being centralized into who says who lives and dies; and who says who gets to keep their earnings and who doesn’t, however paltry they may beand for what social good?  For doing good?

No, not really — only good within limits of “I get to control what’s done with the world,” the song of the tax-exempt foundation run (or funded) by some great philanthropists, whose names are usally put on it too (good for PR), and in accompaniment with the corporations (businesses) that helped make that wealth.  The tax-exempt foundation, by being tax-exempt, serves as a drainage ditch to reduce the taxes that would otherwise be paid on the FOR-profit.

Why else do we think so many of them are running around all over (look at the civic works, PBS shows, “Models for Change” programs calculating how to mobilize swift transformation of chosen areas of reform, such as “Juvenile Justice” or other areas.  Go review MDRC again (I’ve blogged it) for an example of how inbred US Gov’t and Corporate wealth/tax-exempt foundations really are.  Even AFCC is getting some help these days.


We’ve been hooked on it for 100 years next year (1913 – 2013) think about it.  What an addiction.

The greatest goods would be protecting unalienable rights is LIFE, and LIBERTY and PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS, and having enough self-respect and self-restraint to allow others to do the same — how many golden yachts does one really need? You can’t take it with you, even if you have a golden voice (like Whitney Houston, recently:  global success, gone age 48, leaving one motherless child.  Well, young adult.  A wealthy one for sure, but one absent her mother).

So, here’s the Biblical worldview, at least in the book of Revelation. Followers are encouraged to keep it in mind that this kingdom is temporal and is going to be judged (by fire) — so choose your allegiances well.  Without my interpreting whether that’s smart or not to endorse, here’s the description of that buying and selling of kingdoms, Revelations 18.  As before, spiritual agents (angels, this time) are involved and judgment is swift, expressing indignation and vindication:

The kingdom that rules the world is characterized as “Babylon,” which was a kingdom, earlier.  And, naturally, as a woman:


9And the kings of the earth, who have committed fornication and lived deliciously with her, shall bewail her, and lament for her, when they shall see the smoke of her burning, 10Standing afar off for the fear of her torment, saying, Alas, alas, that great city Babylon, that mighty city! for in one hour is thy judgment come.

11And the merchants of the earth shall weep and mourn over her; for no man buyeth their merchandise any more12The merchandise of gold, and silver, and precious stones, and of pearls, and fine linen, and purple, and silk, and scarlet, and all thyine wood, and all manner vessels of ivory, and all manner vessels of most precious wood, and of brass, and iron, and marble, 13And cinnamon, and odours, and ointments, and frankincense, and wine, and oil, and fine flour, and wheat, and beasts, and sheep, and horses, and chariots, and slaves, and souls of men.

That is indeed what the traffic is in.   It pretty much describes most areas of commerce, including transport of goods:

(Addressed to the CITY): 14And the fruits that thy soul lusted after are departed from thee, and all things which were dainty and goodly are departed from thee, and thou shalt find them no more at all.15 The merchants of these things, which were made rich by her, shall stand afar off for the fear of her torment, weeping and wailing16And saying, Alas, alas, that great city, that was clothed in fine linen, and purple, and scarlet, and decked with gold, and precious stones, and pearls! 17For in one hour so great riches is come to nought. And every shipmaster, and all the company in ships, and sailors, and as many as trade by sea, stood afar off18And cried when they saw the smoke of her burning, saying, What city is like unto this great city! 19And they cast dust on their heads, and cried, weeping and wailing, saying, Alas, alas, that great city, wherein were made rich all that had ships in the sea by reason of her costliness! for in one hour is she made desolate. 20Rejoice over her, thou heaven, and ye holy apostles and prophets; for God hath avenged you on her.

So many enterprises were hooked into the sales that took place in “the city;” but (she) was hell on the apostles and prophets, who were typically exiled, or killed in various gruesome ways, etc. ….there message wasn’t good for business.   (Quite a contrast from some of today’s “apostles and prophets” –see recent post on the bankruptcy of the Crystal Cathedral (Garden Grove, CA) and its founding family’s squabbles with the board, i.e., Robert Schuller et al.  I blogged it over at thefamilycourtmoneymachine.blogspot.com

. . .

 for thy merchants were the great men of the earth; for by thy sorceries were all nations deceived24And in her was found the blood of prophets, and of saints, and of all that were slain upon the earth.

It takes a caste of slaves to produce certain levels of wealth, and even the best of major constructions (The Hoover Dam, the Brooklyn Bridge, Grand Central Station in NY) have been associated with human deaths of workers.  What about the pyramids?   What about the former practice of burying concubines and wives with the death of a ruler?

The lines have to be drawn and crowds have to be kept within their kind, and within their places.  “The great men of the earth” are actually merchants, and there’s no question — is there? — that with slavery and slavehood comes untimely death, too often.  So, look around — where are the deaths happening, where is the blood flowing, and then track the trail of money.  Religion WILL be associated, and it’s not too hard to locate –except perhaps at the very top levels.

Whoever gave what to whom, and how (Adam, Eve, Israel in the Promised Land, whoever ….)   there is no question that there is desire still circulating to rule the world, and that there are layers of collaborators — and the closer to the grants, and wealth (to fly, conference, buy and sell real estate under nonprofit umbrella, even “front groups” to launder the money at times) — the closer to the power, and the deafer the ears become to the cries of those they took the power to (allegedly) help, save, or whatever.

Anyone who’s lived with a certain level of abuse (and knew, by contrast, freedom) knows about this.  Many times, supposedly there is some purpose to all the tyranny — but there never is.  It’s just enforced because they can get away with doing this, and get off on it.  Anything else is pretty much a lie.

WELL, let’s get down to the main show here:

I have been talking, briefly, about the analogy of “The Matrix’ (picked up from someone else who wrote about this) as an artificially created reality which, once you become aware of it, you have to either deal with (mentally, emotionally, psychologically) and determine where to stand regarding it — or take another sedative and go back to sleep.

The Internet is a great, addicting perhaps, but effective way to spread that net; it fishes and sets out bait both.  But, it’s here, and must be dealt with, as a whole lotta money is traveling along that net (being tracked as it goes), and this technology, this tool — like many technological advances — is often used for warfare, to kill.  The question is just, who.

To be read alongside a page added to the other blog:

Three Cities that Rule the World,” Including the Ever-expanding but Centralized DV Field

I’m usually up for concise summaries that make some sense with the reality I’ve been observing.
Regular visitors (there are a few here) know how I feel about the profit/nonprofit caste system — which is a statement on, The Income Tax.
My feelings came in part from watching the nonprofits HHS is funding, from having actually sought help from some of the local ones, and then (later) seen their multi-million funding (their doctrines were a spit in the wind when applied to a single family law judge.  If true, they held no sway in that forum, which is where all souls go (for the most part) who have had both DV AND sons or daughters with the same person.
I’m putting this in to remind us about the medium of exchange we call “money” and how fiat money  and “bona fide” money cannot exist alongside each other, really — because the owners of the fiat money (private bankers) depend on an addicted population for their business.  Free, choice-driven populations and those informed on the situation, would never choose the one that kept their country free over the one that enslaved it, would they?
So lies (deceit, as in ‘Deceived the nations” of Rev. 18) also has to be involved in the “sale” of this solution.   I do look forward to the day when this type of deceit, as well as (while we’re here) I hope the extreme deceit of the people I share DNA with, who have for years been selling abusive “solutions” to the problem of my intent to remain free of them, by working, legally, as I CHOOSE to – also comes out in the wash.  If the Bible is the word of God, it will.  Other than this resurrection and day of judgment thing, I figure it’s a toss-up, but am intending to balance the odds in the favor of the basic truth, while I can.
The book of James also (chapter 5) talks about the behavior of the rich (it’s pretty much throughout the scriptures) and warns the readers about “respect of persons.”  In this worldview, a future Judge is definitely coming; be patient and endure, is the mentality:  Remember Job:  God is just in the long-run.

<< James 5 >>
King James Version

1Go to now, ye rich men, weep and howl for your miseries that shall come upon you2Your riches are corrupted, and your garments are motheaten. 3Your gold and silver is cankered; and the rust of them shall be a witness against you, and shall eat your flesh as it were fire. Ye have heaped treasure together for the last days. 4Behold, the hire of the labourers who have reaped down your fields, which is of you kept back by fraud, crieth: and the cries of them which have reaped are entered into the ears of the Lord of sabaoth5Ye have lived in pleasure on the earth, and been wanton; ye have nourished your hearts, as in a day of slaughter. 6Ye have condemned and killed the just; and he doth not resist you.7Be patient therefore, brethren, unto the coming of the Lord. Behold, the husbandman waiteth for the precious fruit of the earth, and hath long patience for it, until he receive the early and latter rain. 8Be ye also patient; stablish your hearts: for the coming of the Lord draweth nigh. 9Grudge not one against another, brethren, lest ye be condemned: behold, the judge standeth before the door. 10Take, my brethren, the prophets, who have spoken in the name of the Lord, for an example of suffering affliction, and of patience. 11Behold, we count them happy which endure. Ye have heard of the patience of Job, and have seen the end of the Lord; that the Lord is very pitiful, and of tender mercy.

I realize i’ve quoted from two books (James, Revelation) not among the earlier ones; apparently James wasn’t quoted til around 225.A.D.

More references for the curious, here (I haven’t reviewed, just put up one or two):http://www.bible.ca/b-canon-disputed-books.htm and (better narration here)  http://freethought.mbdojo.com/canon.html

At the close of the second century ((ca. 300 A.D. in other words)) the Christian world was divided into a hundred different sects. Irenaeus and others conceived the plan of uniting these sects, or the more orthodox of them, into one great Catholic church, with Rome at the head; for Rome was at this time the largest and most intluential of all the Christian churches. “It is a matter of necessity,” says Irenaeus, “that every church should agree with this church on account of its preeminent authority.” (Heresies, Book 3).

Don’t forget my recent favorite book “A.D. 381
I should pick on Protestants too — at least the link “freethought” brings up the topics.  Atheists know this, but perhaps don’t think about it too much.  They are surrounded by attending Christians who, if they thought too deeply about the canon of the scriptures, would stop attending, I imagine….  And they vote too, so might as well all of us get some concept of it in operation:  The mainstream religions as we see them nowadays are basically spinoffs of empires and workign alongside them.  Before a certain piont in time, they were only “sects” and followers, many of who were persecuted.  Now adays when we see this type of centralization then called “empire” — we could as easily call it empire, or simply, fascism.

Martin Luther

The greatest name in the records of the Protestant church is Martin Luther. He is generally recognized as its founder; he is considered one of the highest authorities on the Bible; he devoted a large portion of his life to its study; he made a translation of it for his people, a work which is accepted as one of the classics of German literature. With Luther the Bible superseded the church as a divine authority.
And yet this greatest of Protestants rejected no less than six of the sixty-six books composing the Protestant Bible.  Luther rejected the book of Esther. He says: “I am such an enemy to the book of Esther that I wish it did not exist.” In his “Bondage of the Will,” he severely criticises the book.He rejected the book of Jonah. He says: “The history of Jonah is so monstrous as to be absolutely incredible.” (Colloquia, Chap. LX., Sec. 10).He rejected Hebrews: “The Epistle to the Hebrews is not by St. Paul; nor, indeed, by any apostle.” (Standing Preface to Luther’s New Testament).He rejected the Epistle of James: “St. James’ Epistle is truly an epistle of straw.” (Preface to Edition of 1524).  He rejected Jude. “The Epistle of Jude,” he says, “allegeth stories and sayings which have no place in Scripture.” (Standing Preface).  He rejected Revelation. He says: “I can discover no trace that it is established by the Holy Spirit.” (Preface to Edition of 1622).
In the gospels, the books Jesus quoted the most were Deuteronomy (the law), Psalms, and Isaiah.  On the day of Pentecost, per Acts, Peter quoted two only psalms and one prophet (?), and then got right onto explaining what they’d just seen and witnessed in that context, and exhorting people to “repent.” No “theology’ was apparently involved at the time.   It was also prophesied (according to John) that the disciples/apostles would be hauled in front of the authorities to give their answer, and to not pre-meditate what they’d be saying, it would be given to them in their hour.
What then, we might legitimately ask, is going on every Sunday morning (and/or evening, or Wednesday evenings) when people congregate to hear someone’s homily or sermon, or inspired display, of what the scriptures mean, that they couldn’t themselves read, deduce, and act on, assuming they were walking in the same spirit?  At least Catholics seem to keep it mass these days short, and give one time to think during the liturgy!!!  One’s eardrums aren’t assaulted…
Or, for a more secular viewpoint yet, how about from Infidels.org on the canon, making reference to Thomas Jefferson (who didn’t believe in the miracles of Jesus and produced a skinny version, “The Jefferson Bible”, I gather):
The Secular Web
Who says “a mature Christian must ask the question that skeptics ask…” (not a short read, but several good questions and points, for example, about “magic books” and who gets to decide which ones they are:

We’d like to hear directly from God about which books constitute his message. As Paul wrote, “Let God be true, but every man a liar.” (Rom. 3:4) But God has not spoken in this way. Instead, is there some special list, authorized by Jesus, or the original apostles, of books that are specially approved? “God says that these books are the Bible,” we’d like to hear. There is no such list.[4] Who, then, decided what books would be in our Bible?

Back in the fourth century, some bishops took a vote on it. Rather, several church councils voted for conflicting lists, the contradictions of which took centuries more to resolve. These votes came after a long period of sorting and choosing by the churches at large, so that the choice was not haphazard; it was, however, arbitrary in many respects. Because of differences over the Apocrypha, there remains no agreement about which books are in the Christian Old Testament.

It’s kind of a moot point, anyhow, when one can simply dial a preacher or (til the Crystal Cathedral had to change its stripes) pull up to a drive in and watch the show.  The more I think about these things, and connect them to lived experience(s), the more I do see the influence of the remains of the Roman empire, working through highly visible buildings and structures in this world.  It’s obviously (though more obviously than actual scripture, Old or New, seems to justify) a male-dominated, heirarchical religion — that’s hardly debatable now, is it?  (or, are ordained priests marrying with the blessing of the Pope since I last tuned in?)
Here are three photos from an article on “The Three Cities” found on the same forum — what do you think they typify?  The female reality, or the male?
Think about it:

Another thing these three city-states have in common are their own obelisks. Obelisks are tall, four-sided shafts of stone which taper at the top in a pyramidal fashion. The obelisk is phallic in its appearance and represents the male penis. It is symbolic of the Egyptian sun god, Ra, and is an ancient symbol of male energy and generation (G) in Freemasonry.

Vatican obelisk: Located in St. Peter’s Square, the Vatican obelisk was moved from Egypt to its current location in 1586. The circle at the base on the obelisk represents the female vagina and thus male/female duality. Also notice the lines extending from the circle, forming a Union Jack as seen on the British flag.

London obelisk (aka Cleopatra’s Needle): Located on the banks of the River Thames, this obelisk was transported to London and erected in 1878 under the reign of Queen Victoria. The obelisk originally stood in the Egyptian city of On, or Heliopolis (the City of the Sun). The Knights Templars’ land extended to this area of the Thames, where the Templars had their own docks. Either side of the obelisk is surrounded by a sphinx, also symbolism dating back to the ancient world.

Washington Obelisk (aka Washington Monument): Standing at 555 feet, the Washington Monument is the tallest obelisk in the world and also the tallest standing structure in Washington DC. The monument’s cornerstone, a 12-ton slab of marble, was donated by the Grand Lodge of Freemasons. Like the Vatican obelisk, the Washington monument too is surrounded by a circle denoting the female. The reflecting pool in front of the monument signifies the ancient Masonic/Kabbalistic dictum, as above/so below.

~ ~ ~ back to that prophecy (statement, anyhow) in the Bible:

 for thy merchants were the great men of the earth; for by thy sorceries were all nations deceived. 24And in her was found the blood of prophets, and of saints, and of all that were slain upon the earth.

LONDON — financial empire
VATICAN — religious empire
D.C.           —  military empire.
(see “pentagon-vatican connection” also).
Revelation 18, above, cursed and looked forward to the fall of the city of Babylon, because of its deception, and its bloodshed involved in the merchandising of all kinds of delicacies, including slaves.  I don’t know when this book was written, but it scarcely seems to be coming from the point of view of a triumphant Christian empire, with real estate, monuments, a well-clothed priesthood, etc., nor does James.  So modern readers (i.e., agnostics, atheists) are hardly neutral, or fair, to place on its author the same hypocrisy we see everywhere today.
Now, we call this “human trafficking” or “child trafficking,”  and my country, this country, the USA, is governmentally involved in two kinds:  Over the counter (that’s CPS and pharmaceutical friends whether Texan or Wolverine (Michigan, both pushing Risperdal) and under the radar, possibly deliberately, for which you can go read about the Jaycee Dugard situation; in fact, she has begun to speak out on television now; the settlement she was paid for California law enforcement screwup was, as I remember, around $29 million.  WHOSE funds paid that?  Because it was “only” around $14 million that Los Angeles was withholding (collected child support, Silva v. Garcetti) from actually reaching intended customers back in the late 1990s.

The New Freedom Commission was established by executive order on April 29, 2002.  At a speech in New Mexico that day, Bush said mental health centers and hospitals, homeless shelters, the justice and school systems have contact with individuals suffering from mental disorders but that too many Americans fall through the cracks of the current system and so he created the Commission to ensure “that the cracks are closed.”

On July 22, 2003 the NFC recommended redesigning the mental health system in all fifty states and said in a press release, “Achieving this goal will require … a greater focus on mental health care in institutions such as schools, child welfare programs, and the criminal and juvenile justice systems. The goal is integrated care that can screen, identify, and respond to problems early.”

Despite a nearly 500% increase in mental health drugs being prescribed to children in the previous six years, the NFC recommended a plan of mandatory mental health screening for all public school students and follow-up treatment with drugs when needed.


Those who fight back — confronting illegal home invasions  fraudulently ordered (NOT even legitimately court-ordered) for purposes of kidnapping, for purpose of institutionalizing, for the purpose of then administering dangerous drugs to minor children — can, and will, be treated as felons and stripped of their kids, and months/years of their lives in the fight.  That’s the Michigan reference, above.  Testimony (at the rally) of those on Risperdal:

Posted on 04/08/2011 by Diane Bukowski

Godboldo faces eight felony charges for standing off police armored vehicles, helicopters, and SWAT team members brandishing assault weapons on March 24.  She and her supporters say she was only trying to keep Child Protective Services from forcing a dangerous drug, Risperdal, on her child.

Charges have been dropped, she has her daughter back, but they are considering re-instating.  This story deserves follow-up:  Voice of Detroit did good investigative reporting.  The same CPS worker that did this in 2011 was, in 2010, facing a civil lawsuit for pulling a similar stunt to a related (married) couple, only five (5) children were nabbed and put into three different foster homes for 4o months; the amount of deceit involved is simply stunning.  (Brent family, look it up at “justice4maryanne” site).

>“I want my daughter back TODAY,” Godboldo said from the church’s pulpit. “I’m terrified; I don’t know what is happening to her. If we don’t stand up for our children, we have no future. I am so filled with joy and thankful for your support, Detroit. The only reason I came out of my home was not all those guns out there, not the threats they brought against me, but because of YOU!”

Godboldo’s daughter is currently incarcerated at the Hawthorn Family Center at Northville, despite efforts by other family members to have her released to their custody. Attorneys Allison Folmar and Wanda Evans earlier obtained a temporary restraining order preventing doctors there from putting Arianna back on Risperdal.

Despite a large turn-out of supporters at a Wayne County Juvenile Court custody hearing April 6, and evidence that Arianna may have contracted a sexually-transmitted disease while at Hawthorn, Referee Leslie Graves ruled that the child would remain in state custody

The community rallied, and it seems the family was targeted from a number of angles:  single mother, intelligent and insisting on choice (not “the program”), she homeschooled, she was also African-American and in (I remember seeing, can’t find link) the community was poor.  How dare this community not fork over their kids to the Title IV-driven systems for Rx profits?

One woman [that this mother met in jail for defending her kid] told me what Risperdal did to her. She was kidnapped at 17 and forced into prostitution in Chicago. When she got free and came back home, they put her on that drug. She said she felt dizzy, was hallucinating, and couldn’t function on a day-to-day basis.”

Barbara Ann Polizzi, a critical care nurse from New York, drove 13 hours to the rally with her 17-year-old son Michael to tell a story almost identical to that of Arianna’s. Michael too was forced to take Risperdal.    …

“I felt scared and fearful,” he said. “The medicine gave me shortness of breath and made my heart race. I had to get an inhaler and started on heart medication on top of it. I was not Michael anymore.

He said he was she never never gave up on me.”  (It took 6.5 years, she said):

Godboldo’s niece Ambyr Brooks said that the family has been contacted by people from Australia to Canada, many of whom have been similarly subjected to state abductions of their children and forced medications.

Mother (left), Father (middle),  Michael and mother (far right)

While people like these have to fight — with whatever they got — to keep their kids, another one DID fall between the cracks, in N. California (I also have a page on this — to right), and at least one post; an alert UC Berkeley campus security guard (mother) was alert, and followed up, leading to the YOUNG mother below’s release, along with the two kids.  After 18 years in captivity!

Jaycee Dugard Files Lawsuit Against U.S. Government

PHOTO: After being held captive for 18 years, Jaycee Dugard talks to ABC's Diane Sawyer in her first interview since being discovered and freed.
After being held captive for 18 years, Jaycee Dugard talks to ABC’s Diane Sawyer in her first interview since being discovered and freed. (ABC News)
By   Sept. 22, 2011

Jaycee Dugard is suing the federal government because it twice rejected her requests for private mediation over its alleged failure to properly monitor Phillip Garrido, the man who kidnapped her and held her captive for 18 years.

. . .In an exclusive interview with ABC News’ Diane Sawyerearlier this year, Dugard recounted how she overcame the horror of her kidnapping in 1991, her nearly two decade imprisonment in which she gave birth to two children fathered by Garrido, and her healing process since being rescued in 2009.

“There’s a switch that I had to shut off,”

. . . .I said, the US Gov’t was trafficking in children under the radar.  Here’s one:

Garrido was already a convicted kidnapper when he and his wife, Nancy, abducted 11-year-old Dugard as she walked to school from her family’s Tahoe, Calif., home.  He had been sentenced to 50 years in federal prison for kidnapping a woman in 1977. He was released in 1988 and placed on federal parole. In 1999, eight years into his kidnapping and torture of Dugard, he was released from federal parole and thanked by an agent for his “cooperation.

From 1999 to 2009, the state of California was charged with supervising him. At least 60 times, officials from the California Department of Corrections visited the Garrido home and never noticed anything amiss. On at least one visit, an official actually talked to Dugard.

Dugard and her children have already received a settlement from the state of California. Dugard’s attorneys attempted to reach a settlement with the U.S. government through private mediation twice but were denied.

 She said:
Of telling her story, Dugard told Sawyer, “Why not look at it? You know, stare it down until it can’t scare you anymore…I didn’t want there to be any more secrets?I hadn’t done anything wrong. It wasn’t something I did that caused this to happen. And I feel that by putting it all out there, it’s very freeing.”
  (I’m sorry to see that this foundation has taken up with a PAS specialist, in “Transitioning Families”

Rebecca Bailey, PhD – Psy 18732

Transitioning families encompasses the family and individual counseling practice of Rebecca Bailey, Ph.D. as well as her reunification programs, parenting classes and supervised visitation services. Dr. Bailey incorporated her clinical experience with her long-standing interest in animal therapy and the equine-assisted growth and learning programs

Dr. Bailey received her doctoral degree from The Wright Institute in Berkeley, CA. Since 1995 she has focused on high conflict familial situations and parent coordination from a developmental perspective. She is former director of the Sonoma Police Departments Youth and family services program and was a therapist educator for programs such as Marin County’s DUI Program. She continues to work with a variety of state and national organizations such as The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children.

She has served as a Special master and expert witness in cases were parental alienation or estrangement is an issue.

I’m sure that Jaycee Dugard and her mother do not know what this represents, links found on the TF site, and that (as a victim of stranger kidnapping and rape), she wouldn’t approve of the use this theory has been put to, to keep children who have been, at times, raped by their relatives/Dads, back in their custody, and how it FAILS to account for abductions of children by such men, from their mothers, or provide any sort of reunification services for them, either.    I know too many of these situations.    I do not believe that Jaycee and her mother would approve of funding such situations.  I speak as a mother to whom this happened, illegally, permanently (to date) and without real remedy (to date).  My kids’ still don’t know all the truths of their situation, and they most especially don’t know that the stage was set by the works of groups like AFCC and Warshak (and the federal funding, etc.) to make sure this can and does happen.
Men & Dads that need bribes (carrots and sticks) to do the right thing, won’t do the right thing with the bribes anyhow.  They’ll take the bribe (whether it be elimination or reduction of child support arrears, or other rewards, including a sense of control regained over their “ex” // “revenge”) and dump the kids afterwards anyhow — either off with the next wife/woman, or somewhere else.  I know woman who grew up, that experienced this.  Child is sold or farmed out to foster care anyhow, too many times.

“USEFUL LINKS”  (useful for WHAT?)

  • AFCC AFCC is the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts – an interdisciplinary and international association of professionals dedicated to the resolution of family conflict.
  • Dave Ziegler, Ph.D.Beyond Healing, The path to personal contentment after trauma
  • Dr. Richard A. WarshakDr. Warshak is a psychologist and author of Divorce Poison: How To Protect Your Family From Bad-mouthing and Brainwashing, now in its 24th printing, and co-author of the critically acclaimed DVD for children and parents…
  • Parental Alienation Awareness OrganizationBecause most people do not know about PA & HAP until they experience it, the idea of Parental Alienation Awareness Organization was put forth to help raise awareness and provide education about this growing problem of mental and emotional child abuse.
If this person Dr. Bailey wanted to be logical, HONEST & consistent, with her “Transitioning Families” team — she’d treat Mr. Garrido and Nancy Garrido and Jaycee’s daughters (after all, biologically, they were Phil Garrido’s offspring) as the family and get a court order (being a recommending evaluator or parent coordinator and force reunification services on the Garrido/Jaycee’s two daughters — and put Jaycee, the biological and falsely imprisoned, severely abused & sexually assaulted mother on supervised visitation, at her expense until she could learn that “families are forever” meaning, “fathers are forever,” even if they’re temporarily in jail (again) for kidnapping and rape of minors.  This especially seems to apply if one’s family was poor, or one’s skin is a little darker, i.e., Title IV.
But that’s not the way the cookie crumbles while there’s still money in the system — any system —  to be extracted.  Meanwhile, honest people, who helped me during certain years — are paying taxes on the US Debt which is to allegedly provide social services.  I wonder where the millions came from to settle this case — there must have been millions sitting around somewhere.  Interesting.
I wish someone had been around for me to do “reunification services” after the father abandoned OUR kids, failing to tell me when he did so (after having made sure it was a no-contact situation for a long time), and I attempted to regain contact properly and legally.  Instead, I was treated abominably by a local D.A. (though I had written evidence of the abandonment which, like child-stealing, is also a crime) who used sarcasm, ridicule and an attempt to extort more services out of the system — for me.   The man was middle-aged, white, and obviously male, and not on tape.  I left there (another back-burner project) realizing that NO female should ever walk into a room with an investigator, police officer, or district attorney — at least in this area — without the tape recorder on, to keep him or as it may be, them,  in check.  I was foolish to walk in with “only” evidence, and without an advocate — but after xxyy years in the system, there sometimes are no advocates!
Dr. Bailey’s site has rules for Supervised Visitations posted — you should read it.  RULE #1:  “No inappropriate physical contact. Hugging and kissing are okay upon greeting and parting only. This must be acceptable to all parties. No lap sitting.”   RULE #2:  No discussion of molestation allegations, custody or legal situation with the child. If the child brings it us, the parent may acknowledge the topic, but may not respond to the allegation unless the parent wishes to make amends for said action.
ASIDE on seeing the form for Supervised Visitation in association with the JAYC Foundation! 
Reminds me of why Jack Stratton, Ph.D. wrote (1992/1993) is supervised visitation FAIR for children of abusive men?  What does it teach the kids?  (Click on my gravatar logo to read it).     Consider Rule 1 — if the supervised visitation was being applied for the purposes it was sold us under — to prevent molestation ONLY — then that would be one thing.  But, if a child HAS been molested, allegedly, to fail to be allowed to (if young and this would otherwise be appropriate) simply see and hug his or her Mama — if SHE is the one on supervision due to having allowed the child to report, or see a mandatory reporter, or even if the child simply bumped into a mandatory reporter at school or elsewhere — (all situations that have indeed led to mothers being supervised at times, in state after state) — then that’s simply wrong.   I can understand Rule 2, part 1 — but look at the second part of the topic.  This literally means that contact with the non-molesting parent will be closely monitored to make sure a child does NOT report further abuse if it happened.  Both the nonmolesting parent AND the child(ren) must be trained — by this “reunification specialist and via supervised visitation) that any further mention of current abuse, or distress from it (i.e., comfort-seeking with a familiar parent) — will be punished.  The most logical form of punishment would be (for that nonmolesting parent / mother) to have NO visitation whatsoever.
And, here, the fee is $150 per hour.  Remind me to make sure this is no access/visitation subgrantee also …..
They are hurting around this issue over in Scranton, PA.  “Kids for Cash” in neighboring Luzerne is already history . . . Remember Viola Stroud case! (Dutchess County, NY)  Remember Helen O. Page case (Amador County, California).  Now there’s another high-profile case in Connecticut, too; the mother’s parents have put up so far $1 MILLION to help in the case — and are living with THEIR parents, I heard, having mortgaged their own property to help protect their grandson.    It does seem to be a pattern.

ANYHOW . . .  The Three Cities and Fiat Currency . . . .

And one of the most important things in life is to know when someone else is, habitually, lying, and cease doing any kind of business with them until they stop, and permanently, if they cannot stop broadcasting their own lifes based on own perceptions and intent to dominate another person against his or her will, illegally and by fraud.
 This person also posted the article I put on the other post, at link http://forum.prisonplanet.com/index.php?topic=106799.msg648631#msg648631, thread “Empire of the Cities – The Three Cities that Rule The World.”  this is the entire post, dated 5/21/2009….
It has some details about “tallies” and “stocks” you may not know.  Italics (or other font changes) are mine.  I haven’t fact-checked (you can).  But does it start to make some sense, yet?  I’m talking, income tax, federal reserve, for-profit not-for profit distinction (which only the income tax makes possible, really).

The Moneylenders Take Over England

In the 19th century, the Rothchild banking family’s Nathan Rothchild said it well:

“I care not what puppet (sits on) the throne of England to rule the Empire on which the sun never sets. The man who controls Britain’s money supply controls the British empire, and I (when he ran the Bank of England) control the British money supply.”

{{2012 is an election year.  Americans (USA) would do well to keep this in mind also.}}

Centuries early, moneylender power was absent. But after the 1666 Coinage Act, money-issuing authority, once the sole right of kings, was transferred into private hands. “Bankers now had the power to cause inflations and depressions at will by issuing or withholding their gold coins.”

King William III (1672 – 1702), a Dutch aristocrat, financed his war against France by borrowing 1.2 million pounds in gold in a secret transaction with moneylenders, the arrangement being a permanent loan on which debt would be serviced and its principle [“principal”]  never repaid. It came with other strings as well:

— lenders got a charter to establish the Bank of England (in 1694) with monopoly power to issue banknotes as national paper currency;

— it created them out of nothing, with only a fraction of them as reserves;

— loans to the government were to be backed by government IOUs to serve as reserves for creating additional loans to private borrowers; and

— lenders could consolidate the national debt on their government loan to secure payment through people-extracted taxes.

{{sound familiar yet?}}

It was a prescription for huge profits and “substantial political leverage. The Bank’s charter gave the force of law to the ‘fractional reserve’ banking scheme that put control of the country’s money” in private hands. It let the Bank of England create money out of nothing and charge interest for loans to the government and others – the same practice central banks now employ.


For the next century, banknotes and tallies circulated interchangeably even though they weren’t a compatible means of exchange. Banker money expanded when “credit expanded and contracted when loans were canceled or ‘called,’ producing cycles of ‘tight’ money and depression alternating with ‘easy’ money and inflation.” In contrast, tallies were permanent, stable, fixed money, making banknotes look bad so they had to go.

For another reason as well – because of King William’s disputed throne and fear if he were deposed, moneylenders again might be banned. They used their influence to legalize banknotes as the money of the realm called “funded” debt with tallies referred to as “unfunded,” what historians see as the beginning of a “Financial Revolution.” In the end, “tallies met the same fate as witches – death by fire.”


They were money of the people competing with moneylending bankers. After 1834 monetary reform, “tally sticks went up in flames in a huge bonfire started in a House of Lords stove.” Ironically, it got out of control and burned down Westminster Palace and both Houses of Parliament, symbolically ending “an equitable era of trade (by transferring power) from the government to the” central bank.

{{simple explanation:on the terms, and this burning:  terms “tally” “stocks” “broker” (Stockade) and “Exchequer”, Charles Dickens quoted}}


Original Wooden Tally Sticks (2)
[England, Westminster, c. 1250-1275]

hickory wood, the larger end cut diagonally, edges roughly squared off leaving traces of bark, each inscribed along one side with the name of the payer and the upper and lower edges cut with notches (“v”-shaped for pounds, broad grooves for shillings, sharp cuts for pence), each piece then split with a knife by cutting diagonally across the thicker end of the reverse side and pulling away a length which would be retained separately by the payer as proof of payment, written in thirteenth-century charter hands. c. 175-200 mm. long (each).

Rare survival of a medieval form of financial record-keeping, the tally stick provides the origin of many words used in modern money markets: stock, foil, stockholder, bank stock, and check. The vast majority were destroyed in the nineteenth century in the fire of the Palace of Westminster and the Houses of Parliament.


Tallies provide the earliest form of bookkeeping. They were used in England by the Royal Exchequer from about the twelfth century onward. Since the notches for the sums were cut right through both pieces and since no stick splits in an even manner, the method was virtually foolproof against forgery. They were used by the sheriff to collect taxes and to remit them to the king. They were also used by private individuals and institutions, to register debts, record fines, collect rents, enter payments for services rendered, and so forth. By the thirteenth century, the financial market for tallies was sufficiently sophisticated that they could be bought, sold, or discounted. 

“Tallies were … a sophisticated and practical record of numbers. They were more convenient to keep and store than parchments, less complex to make, and no easier to forge…. Of the millions of medieval tallies made, only a few hundred survive.” (Clanchy, p. 96; see also p. 95, n. 28, pl. VIII). In 1724, treasury officials commanded that tallies no longer be used, but it was not until 1834, with the reform acts and the abolition of the office of the Receipt of the Exchequer, that a huge bonfire of the then-obsolete medieval tally sticks was held. Started in a stove stuffed full of sticks in the House of Lords, the fire quickly got out of control, spreading to the paneling, and burning down both the Palace of Westminster and the Houses of Parliament.

In 1911, Sir Hilary Jenkinson knew of only three Exchequer tally sticks in private hands (pp. 292-3, 330, and 350).

The evolution of money technologies originates with the tally stick. From tally stick comes the modern word “stock,” meaning a financial certificate and deriving from the use of the Middle English for the stick. The piece retained by the bank was called the “foil.” The holder of the stock was said to be the “stockholder” and owned “bank stock.” A written certificate presented for remittance and checked against its security later became a “check.”

According to legend, Wall Street was founded in its present location because of the presence there of an enormous chestnut tree, said to be plentiful enough to supply enough tally sticks for the emerging American stock market.

Clanchy, M. T. From Memory to Written Record, England 1066-1307, Cambridge, Mass., 1979.

Jenkinson, Hilary C. “Exchequer Tallies,” Archaeologia, second series, 12 (1911), pp. 292 ff.

Tallies and Technologies, by Dave Birch, Journal of Internet Banking and Commerce

The Origins of Mathematics

[[The other source cited is the link, above to definitions]]

forum.prisonplanet. . . cont’d….

Henceforth {{1834ff?}}, private bankers kept government in debt, never demanding the return of principle [“principal”], and profiting by extracting interest, a very lucrative system always paying off “like a slot machine” rigged to benefit its operators. It became the basis for modern central banking, lending its “own notes (printed paper money), which the government swaps for bonds (its promises to pay) and circulates as a national currency.

{{BONDS — hold that thought}}

Government debt is never repaid. It’s continually rolled over and serviced, today with no gold in reserve to back it. Though gone, tallies left their mark. The word “stock” comes from the tally stick. Much of the original Bank of England stock was bought with these sticks. In addition, stock issuance began during the Middle Ages as a way to finance businesses when no interest-bearing loans were allowed.

This is not “archaic” information and irrelevant — it’s VERY current.  I am still digesting — but it makes sense.  Here’s a Brit (I gather) relating the Monarchy’s relationship to the Corporation of London (which holds the crown — the one you’ve seen on TV perhaps, loaned out for state occasions) and correlating to a May, 2011 meeting with the British Prime Minister Cameron with Eurozone personnel, re: ESM (Hey, it’s new term to me….).  I just saw Cameron sitting next to President Obama watching a basketball game, on TV….

He is thinking in terms of the Corporation that holds the (moulah) versus the “State” which is subject to it.  It’s a BIG deal!

That meeting, the ESM and the Crown – why Cameron said NO

( Dec. 2011)

I know that many of you who visit this site have looked deeply into our constitution, and are already aware that our State, the Crown, is not the Monarchy, but the Corporation of London.

The ‘Crown’ is in trust to the Corporation of London, it owns it and has done since Cromwell hocked it in return for unrepayable loans from Dutch Bankers, loans that are still being repaid today, to finance a bankrupt England after the Civil War.
In order that the Crown never left these shores and the transaction remained unknown to a largely starving and extremely volatile population it was to be held in trust in perpetuity by a new body, which eventually became The Corporation of London .

It is this Crown that all State employees swear allegiance to, with the exception of the Royal Navy who give their allegiance to the Queen directly. It is why the Crown is housed in the Tower of London, within the bounds of the City, and only loaned to the Monarch for State occasions.

What these charlies across the Channel are trying to do is the same thing, and largely for the same reasons. The new revised ESM that was suggested on Friday would become thenew State of Europa.

In the same way that the State sits above the British Government, this planned ESM Treaty would be a level oState above the EU and its institutions.

Yes, Child Support Industry IS a For-Profit Government Fraud (“F.R.A.M.E.D.” and other topics)

with 18 comments

(after update notes, 2 paragraphs):

Posted originally July 17, 2011. I see from some of the charts that I updated it since (there are tables from HHS of Access Visitation grants showing from year 2014, 2015), probably to clean up the table formats. Visiting it again because of a recent comment (approved 2/17/2016). Searchable terms, “undistributable child support collections.” Beware challenging stockpiles of improperly withheld (by government) wealth — a long time ago, attorney Richard Fine representing John Silva (a father) — did this. Fine also challenged illegal payments to judges from the County after judges’ salaries were officially transferred to the State level (ongoing process of removing local control), and some powerful RE developers. He spent 18 months in solitary coercive retirement (designed to produce behavioral change) and as an old (69,70 yrs old) and lost his law license (was disbarred) as a result.

Since 2011, I became aware of a source of reading government financial statements (“CAFRs, see more recent posts), and and more aware of fund accounting within government. I recommend people (the public), particularly in your areas of subject matter priority, including child support, go hunt down some of these funds, demonstrate you have read and comprehended the basics in those statements, and start asking hard questions.

This blog discusses

Child Support is a For-Profit Government Fraud” From:  “F.R.A.M.E.D.” (framedfathers.blogspot.com) Saturday, May 15, 2010  / Bruce Eden

And while agreeing with the title, makes a few other points by commenting on it.

Family Court Judges order such onerous child support amounts in some cases, along with alimony, daycare, medical expenses, and other expenses, that the father can’t survive. He ends up becoming despondent, leaves his job and drops out of sight. He loses all contact with his child(ren) as a result. This is the government’s ultimate goal.** Breaking up of father-headed families (and then mother-headed ones when there are no more fathers, wherein, the government will come for the children without any resistance)

2014 update, (next few paragraphs in italics)

**The government’s ultimate goal appears to be power and control, for profit.  The entire population, if it became fully aware of the actual profit retained by all levels of government entities (as expressed on their “CAFR” reports I learned in spring 2012 and have been reporting since), many of us would be justifiably outraged, and some of this outrage would not be expressed in nice, compliant, obedient manner.

By keeping us economically strapped through these institutions of perpetual warfare,  against individual rights, constantly eroding them under the premise it’s for our own good (and usually what’s being held over anyone’s head at any point of time is someone else’s poverty.  Put up with more erosion of rights “for the good of the group.”  

At times, the government doesn’t just strip children off their mothers, but gives them back to the fathers after the domestic violence protection has been removed.  That’s the game, folks.  Promise protection, then fail to deliver.  Take situations in crisis (for a variety of reasons, but definitely may include abuse), and exploit them – – – for profit.  What I do, and what I recommend both mothers AND fathers do, is find that profit.  To find that profit, one has to, after the anecdotes and narratives, which speak to the emotional, wounded, and high-charged issues, get clear, cold, hard, focused and analytical — and use that analytical truth in its own words, to expose the systems.  These are not just one system with one results, but multiple systems with multiple goals, depending on what sector they are in.
Read the rest of this entry »

Look: Domestic Violence matters. Ask Phil Garrido’s first wife. Ask Lindolfo Thibes’ daughter.

with one comment


Good Grief, when are we going to take ANY violation of ANY criminal law VERY seriously?  

Sorry to drop people in the post mid-stream, but this has been a very disturbing case to handle, given that my own kids were “kidnapped”in the context oif all these key elements, practically, except prior prison term and rape conviction (or as far as I know, rape).  But, most of the rest.  

Including the system’s failure to put a lid on it.  

(Stolen, not kidnapped, technically.  Only the fact that they were not actually removed from the state meant it was not kidnapping and prevented, supposedly, FBI from involvement.  They were missing to me, for sure, at this time.  I have too many and very significant questions (not all evident from this post) as to WHY certain perpetrators are getting out of prison when and in what means they do.  Also as to WHY certain crimes are still not taken seriously enough by:  arresting officers, prosecutors, and sentencing judges alike.


I know as well as anyone and so do many, many women and children, how one could be abused “in broad daylight” and no intervention in sight.  I don’t think grown women get “used” to this, but children are an entirely different situation.

Everyone assumes someone else is handling it.  Not enough people are willing to notice, act on, AND follow through and press police, etc. to follow through on, what they have reported.  When I was assaulted at home, sometimes neighbors called police to the home, who didn’t press charges, report, or for the most part hand out anything regarding domestic violence.  Up to and including several years after the violence against women act had passed, too.  The reporting didn’t stop much, and generally happened after an incident was already over with.  It didn’t deter a follow-up.

I not only kept showing up for work (though often traumatized) I once even showed up in the dentist’s office with my teeth knocked loose.  I don’t remember almost any questions being asked, of any significance, in how this happened.  How often did they get women with front teeth knocked loose in there?  Especially nonathletic looking ones that didn’t look like the lifestyle included rollerblading or contact football, etc..

When my kids were stolen, law enforcement was involved in ENABLING this, as was the family law system, as were “mediators” and of course my relatives were part of the support system making it happen, and reason for it.  It was part of the “cult-like” mentality.  While these people work, I presume, in public, what they do in private is as “off the grid” as any Garrido.

This kidnapping/sex abuse/rescue case is prominent enough, I’ll not summarize it here, any search will produce an article RICH with links, fascination, background, and excuses.  It’s a public purging of the conscience and an attempt to lay blame somewhere, so we can all get on with life and believe that this is NOT business as usual in quality or quantity.

It takes a Village to raise a child?  It takes several villagers to expect law enforcement to handle what they know is going on.

The same method that works for not reporting domestic violence against women, and stalking, kidnapping, jealous obsessions, and inordinate need to DOMINATE — if only one woman, still, that woman — plus failure to maintain one’s own livelihood, participate productively in society (not productively in the black market or “off the grid”).




From rag NYDAILYNEWS (I had to put blinders on to read the article, which was pretty raw itself):

August 30, 2009:

Look at this account of his first kidnapping/rape victim that generated the 1977 sentence, of which he only served 11 years.

Conrad was on routine patrol in the early morning hours of Nov. 23, 1976, when he spotted a car with California tags outside a Reno storage facility.

The cop soon noticed a light flickering under the shed’s rollup door, prompting him to bang on it. A disheveled Garrido, shirtless and wearing jeans, opened the door almost immediately.

“I asked him what he was doing in there,” Conrad recalled.

Before Garrido could answer, a female voice cried out from inside the warehouse, and a woman emerged from behind a curtain completely nude. She said she had been kidnapped and raped.

He didn’t seem nervous or anything,” Conrad said. “He just said they were boyfriend and girlfriend, and they were just having consensual sex.”  


(How consensual depends on the point of view….)

Conrad told the woman, later identified as Katherine Callaway, to get dressed. His backup arrived soon after and informed him that the license plate had been traced to a car involved in a kidnapping that afternoon.

Callaway was abducted, handcuffed and assaulted after picking up Garrido as a hitchhiker.

Conrad slapped cuffs on him.

t’s that “ONLY 11 YEARS” part that concerns me, as I wonder about the NJ Toms River, let out murder/suicide situation, plus the similar one, same area, the previous year.  What’s UP with that?


Even then, Conrad didn’t know that Garrido was high on acid and that the storage unit was equipped with various sex aids, pornography, stage lights and wine.

Garrido later told a detective he needed to dominate women to satisfy his sexual urges.

“I said, ‘What the hell are you resorting to this for?'” retired Reno Detective Dan DeMaranville, 74, recalled to The News. “He said that’s the only way he gets sexual gratification. … The guy should have been castrated while he was in prison.”



The 56-year-old psycho kept Dugard and the two daughters he fathered with her captive in a secret compound behind his home in Antioch, Calif.

Local cops acknowledged they missed an opportunity to save Dugard in 2006 when a neighbor reported the man known as “Creepy Phil” had sexual addictions and kept little girls in his backyard.

The deputy dispatched to Garrido’s home left without even setting foot in the registered sex offender’s yard.

The mystery of Dugard’s disappearance ended when a University of California, Berkeley, cop became suspicious of Garrido and contacted his parole officer. Garrido later confessed to kidnapping the sweet-faced blond, cops said.




Jaycee Lee Dugard kidnapper Phillip Garrido’s first wife Christine Murphy says he’s a ‘monster

(NY Daily News, next day)…

The Monster’s first wife says he once “tried to gouge” her eyes out with a safety pin.

Phillip Garrido, who is accused of kidnapping Jaycee Lee Dugard and raping her repeatedly during 18 years of captivity, went into a jealous rage when he saw another man flirting with his wife.

“He took a safety pin and went after my eyes,” Christine Murphy told Inside Edition. “He left a scar on my face.”

(Why not go after the man?)

Murphy, who said she and Garrido were high school sweethearts in northern California, said he “smacked” her around during their brief marriage and that she became his first kidnapping victim when she tried to flee him.

“I was always looking for a way to find out how to get away,” said Murphy, who worked at a Reno casino to pay the bills while Garrido tried to launch a musical career. “He’d always told me he’d find me wherever.

Murphy said that when she was finally able to escape, Garrido “found me.”

“He pulled up, turned around and forced me back into the car,” she said, in part one of the Inside Edition interview that airs Monday night.

Calling Garrido a “good manipulator” and a “monster,” Murphy said she was relieved when Garrido was sentenced to 50 years in prison in 1976 for kidnapping and raping another woman.

Murphy, who remarried and is now a mother a four, said she had no idea Garrido had been released early and reacted with disgust after he was arrested for turning Dugard into a sex slave and fathering her two daughters.

“It makes me sick to my stomach,” she said. “He’s pretty much capable of anything.”


Cops Searched the Home but Didn’t See Compound

Jaxon Van Derbeken, Chronicle Staff Writer

Friday, August 28, 2009

Garrido’s luck held in July of last year, when a multiagency task force in Contra Costa County searched his home as part of a sexual offender compliance check, officials said. He had a string of offenses dating back to 1971 and was a registered sex offender on parole in California.


Police, however, had been told about the backyard lair before, according to a former neighbor.

Erika Pratt said that two years ago, she called police after seeing what looked like a living compound with tents and sheds.

No warrant

Sheriff’s deputies came to ask questions, Pratt said, but they told her that because they didn’t have a warrant, they couldn’t search the house.

“I always wished someone could do something about it,” Pratt said. “It was like he was charging people to live there.”

Sheriff’s spokesman Jimmy Lee confirmed that his agency had dealt with Garrido before, but he was not able to provide details.

“We need to investigate it further to determine what that contact was,” Lee said.


Criminal probe

At the time of the sex offender task force’s check last year, Garrido was the subject of a criminal probe that began in 2008 and had nothing to do with sex crimes.

Aguinaga said Garrido was suspected of bilking an elderly neighbor out of his life savings. A complaint was lodged on the man’s behalf when he moved to Friendship Residential Care in Antioch, Aguinaga said.

The elder care home relayed allegations that from late 2007 to March 2008, Garrido swindled Dilbert “Jack” Medieros, now 79, of nearly $18,000. In the end, prosecutors cited insufficient evidence in declining to file charges in April.

Garrido told police that Medieros had given him money to help start a church. He also told investigators that he had known Medieros for years and took him places such as the zoo.

Which others were complicit in her torment?  

Details of Jaycee’s torment have been beamed around the world. Yet according to his neighbour, the full, awful truth about what really took place here might be worse than imagined – far worse.

For with FBI agents now digging-up Creepy Phil’s backyard and exploring his neighbour’s property, Mr Rogers shudders at the memory of the sounds he heard when it was ‘party time’ next door.

 Mr Rogers says ‘perverts’ in the area were regularly invited over by Garrido for sex, beer and drug parties and that the Garrido home was, in effect, being used as a brothel.

{{Mr. Rogers also, naturally, tells why he didn’t report this and was not involved.}}

As details of this dark and troubling story slowly come to light, the question that America is asking itself above all others is: how on Earth was Garrido able to carry out his despicable crimes in the heart of suburban California, without anyone noticing – and for 18 years? 

{{Despicable crimes happen in respectable neighborhoods all the time.  What TYPE may vary with neighborhood. Or maybe not so much — ask any victim of domestic violence how it went and how SHE got out.  All it takes is enough people to figure out someone else will report it, and enough enablers.  }}


             Worse still, could others have known what was taking place there – and even been complicit in Jaycee’s torment?

Certainly, Walnut Avenue is a grubby, primitive and predominantly white area. Many of the homes are little more than wooden shacks with children playing in the dirt outside.

Drug and alcohol addiction are widespread; back yards are littered with cars and fridges. Astonishingly, the area is home to 144 rapists and paedophiles.


‘People here live off the grid,’ says one local police source. ‘That means they use drugs, don’t pay taxes and never pay their bills. They live as they want to – and pay no attention to anyone else. And everyone who lives here is very happy with that arrangement.’

 The surrounding streets offer another insight into Garrido’s twisted mindset as he held two generations hostage for his own sexual gratification. As darkness fell on Saturday, people scurried from dusty yard to yard, buying and selling crystal meth.

 Highly addictive and responsible for making users’ teeth fall out in a syndrome known as ‘meth mouth’, crystal meth, also known as crank, is an amphetamine which has swept the U.S. Experts say users experience unstoppable sexual urges.

 Locals say Garrido, who had previously been addicted to LSD, was a ‘tweaker’ – the slang word for crystal meth addicts, whose habit leads to characteristic spasms of twitching – and that he was also reputed to ‘cook’ the raw materials for crystal meth in an old van in his garden. This ‘laboratory’ reportedly exploded last month. Again, neighbours did not call police.


One man:

Smacking girlfriend around, trying to gouge her eye out (possessive jealousy), stalking/kidnapping, kidnapping and raping again, being let out (being let OUT?), kidnapping and raping again, and again.  In the context, drug use, and did I mention financial elder abuse?


Is this enough cause to take violence against women SERIOUSLY?  Or is it really OK to dominate a woman by whatever means necessary. Look at what goes with it.  Look what kind of characters need to do this.


I said I was having a hard time with this post, and I am.  Because while Philip was not biologically related to the girl he kidnapped, THIS one was:


Man who assaulted daughter, fathered her children is sentenced

Lindolfo Thibes, formerly of Los Angeles, gets 109 years to life for physically and sexually abusing his daughter for two decades. The case came to light when he stabbed her in Las Vegas.

By Jack Leonard

April 18, 2009

The emergency call came in as a domestic violence assault: A man had stabbed his girlfriend in the parking lot of a Las Vegas hospital.

But as detectives began to investigate, they unearthed a dark family secret. The suspect was not the victim’s boyfriend but her father, who had been sexually assaulting her for nearly two decades and had fathered her three children.

The assaults, the victim told authorities, started when she was 6 years old and living in Los Angeles. She said her father, a martial arts instructor, threatened to kill her if she told anyone and kept her a prisoner at home, monitoring her movements using surveillance cameras and delivering fierce beatings during paranoid rages.

On Friday, the daughter, now 29, sat silently in a downtown Los Angeles courtroom as a judge sentenced Lindolfo Thibes to prison for 109 years to life in what police describe as the most heinous case of child abuse they had encountered.

As her father was led away in handcuffs, the woman wept quietly and embraced her younger brother, who she said was also a victim of beatings by their father.

> > > > > 

At that rate:  109 years — judging by Garrido’s case, he should be out in 22.


The victim told investigators that the abuse began in the mid-1980s when she and her father were alone in the house. Her mother worked nights and eventually moved out of the home to be a home healthcare provider. (The mother could not be reached for comment.)

Children need their fathers.  ALL children need their fathers.  No matter who the father.  LEt me get this again:  ALL children need their fathers the major crisis of our times is fatherlessness.  Children who don’t live with their father are more likely to grow up and have awful problems and engage in crime.  The federal government should make sure that more fathers get MORE access to their children.  

Keep saying that, so you feel better, maybe you’ll really be able to believe this sooner or later, and incidents like this are ALL fabrications. CHILDREN  need their fathers. Not necessarily their mothers (judging by the courts), but certainly their FATHERS.  MOTHERS are optional, FATHERS are not.  (keep trying, I know you can get it right).  This applies even when their fathers have a need to dominate women by assaulting them, whether for sex, religion, or just because it’s fun.  Children need their fathers

Her father, the woman told authorities, plied her with alcohol and marijuana from the age of 8. {{Concurrent with the incest}}  She said she was pulled out of school in sixth grade and estimated that she was sexually assaulted about 10 times a week, according to law enforcement records.

In an interview with The Times, the woman said her father rigged the family’s West Adams home with surveillance cameras inside and out. Under her bed, she said, were motion detectors that set off an alarm when she got up.

As a teenager, she was forbidden to leave the house alone. Her father often grew paranoid and accused her of trying to escape or of secretly meeting boys. Enraged, he would beat her and her brother on their feet with a baseball bat, she said.

She feared deportation if she reported the abuse, she said, but was also terrified of the consequences if authorities did not believe her. 

He said he “would kill me if he ever got his hands on me if I ever told,” she said. “He used to tell me he was going to cut my head off.” 

At 17, she gave birth to her first child. For years, she said, her oldest daughter was her only friend. The moments they shared playing with the girl’s toys or watching television offered small but important comforts during her life with her father. There were also times, she said, when she and her father played video games or watched movies together.

“I would use little happy thoughts to keep me going,” she said.

Her father, she said, grew fearful that her brother had told police about abuse at the home and fled to Las Vegas in 2003, taking her and her children. They lived in a motel, where, she said, Thibes told others that she was his girlfriend.

In April 2005, he stabbed her twice in the chest with a 10-inch kitchen knife, police records show. In interviews with police, he described her at various times as his wife, girlfriend or daughter.

The woman said she told hospital workers about the abuse once her father had been arrested and she knew her children were safe in custody.




Again, among these elements listed above were:  Kidnapping, (more than once) rape, domestic violence, need to dominate women for sexual fulfilment, elder abuse (financial), stalking, jealousy, and use of drugs with sex, living off the grid, and possibly pimping out young women to the neighborhood.  When they weren’t also working for him (Jaycee Dugard also helped with his printing business, it came out).  

Oh yes, and in the case of Garrido, being inexplicably let out of jail early (anyone heard why yet?), and inexplicably not caught by multiagency task forces whose responsibility was to monitor.

Musta been because they were in an “unincorporated area” of Antioch.


What about when one parent is in a family court litigation?  OH, well, that’s an ENTIRELY different matter, and the:  Kidnapping, history of violence, obsessive jealousy, living off the grid, stalking, and financial elder abuse no longer apply.  Let us convene some more experts to see which is the better parent, and how they can do 50/50 parenting, and ask a few psychological experts to evaluate how dangerous that one doing the:  kidnapping, stalking, living largely off the grid, and in general refusing to obey the law, really is.  Does that REALLY impact the children growing up?


Based on too many cases I know, including (case in point) mine, supposedly not.


Now you know why I’m having a hard time with this one.


Let’s compare who let Garrido out (what system, which people) with the ones in Toms River, NJ 2009 (and same county, 2008) that resulted in murder/suicide shortly after release, with another one that’s an accident about to happen I read about in Connecticut recently:  Fiance comes at his wife with a ball bat in disguise, they marry, and she finds out later.  When the facts are out, he is still released on $50,000 bail.

Oh yeah, and he was a town alderman — I suppose that was irrelevant.


Police: Connecticut town official was masked man who attacked fiancee days before wedding

ANSONIA, Conn. (AP) — A public official wearing a mask attacked his fiancee inside their Connecticut home four days before their wedding, throwing a blanket over her, hitting her with a baseball bat and running out the back door, police said.

Keith Maynard, an Ansonia town alderman who has since resigned, was arraigned Thursday afternoon in Superior Court and released on $50,000 bail. He declined to comment to reporters as he left the hearing.

What the hell kind of bail is that?  

Maynard has been charged with second-degree assault, first-degree unlawful restraint and first-degree reckless endangerment.

Police say the woman, now Maynard’s wife, came home July 1 to find a masked man inside the house. She was treated for minor abrasions after the attack.

“I love my husband more than anything and to know that five days later was my wedding and he could do that and go through with the wedding. I was very surprised,” Ida Maynard told reporters outside the courthouse.

The judge ordered Maynard to stay away from the house so Ida Maynard can live there. He was also ordered to turn over any firearms, though his lawyer, John Kelly, said he did not believe Maynard had any.


Was he just getting off on the ball bat attack, or was there some other motive involved?  Was this foreplay?  Preliminary to finding out how much abuse she was going to put with during marriage?  Is any protective order in place?  It’s kind of a half-baked article, there, eh?

Courtesy Ansonia PD

He works for Department of Transportation. Well, he’s on “paid administrative leave” at this time.

(Article has considerable more detail & link to arrest warrant, too:  they’d dated 6 years, another woman possibly involved at time of attack, his wife had a son.   )

Blume said nothing in Maynard’s personality indicated he was capable of any kind of violence.

Can we yet face it, most of us are not THAT good judges of personality?  And psychological profile doesn’t of itself determine whether or not there’s been violence.


“Even if we argued, he never raised his voice. Here’s a guy who is just a nice, quiet individual who just did his job,” Blume said. “I don’t know what to say. I’m speechless, and I’m never speechless.”


Myth:  quiet people don’t engage in violence.  Work face is similar to at home face.

I’ve known him,” Della Volpe said. “He was a good public servant. But I certainly don’t condone domestic violence. . .Obviously this is a sad day for our community.”

Maynard was a supervisor for the state Department of Transportation. He has been on the Board of Alderman for 10 years, and had been nominated by the Democratic Town Committee to run for another term.

Board of Alderman President Stephen Blume said Maynard was an “excellent Alderman” who took all of his responsibilities seriously.

“I’m shocked by the news. I feel sorry for the woman who had to go through this,” Blume said.

Maynard resigned from the Board of Alderman Wednesday night. The board is expected to accept the resignation at its next meeting.

Police Chief Kevin Hale said he was also saddened by the news, but said it was an example of how the police department doggedly investigates domestic violence matters.


Yes they certainly do.  They investigated, and someone else released the obviously disturbed and dangerous fellow, and thanks to being on PAID administrative leave (something many women don’t get ~ ~ in fact, never met anyone that got anything from a “Victims of Crime” fund ever as to DV ~ ~ when I was being battered, or had crimes committed against me that caused work loss-es)  What’s more, the bail has released this man, and his attorney doesn’t think he has weapons (not including baseball bats?).


Why don’t they give Ida Maynard a baseball bat and some mace?


Sorry, folks, I probably shouldn’t write about incidents a little too close to home.  No, I am NOT reassured about my kids at this point, and one is in college presently, too.  I’m a little worried about their current value system, seeing as the court has put them in the custody of an identified batterer (same County/City) despite repeated police involvement repeated infractions of custody order, stalking, failure to respect child support orders (the most obvious), some really odd explanations for why, counter-accusations that I was a flight risk when I had no means to get away and had significant professional involvement right here, and other kind of delusional reports.  

Oh yes — and when they’d just been in essence kidnapped!

WHY do people kidnap?  To protect?  Or to guard against reporting?  Or when the kidnapping is to avoid a child support arrears, when it was set fairly low (if below welfare levels is any indicator), or to “dominate a woman” which is already on the record.  Every single indicator of some severe personality problems is already on the record, and the local enforcment, won’t?

Is it just because they’re too busy investigating more serious cases, like they did with Jaycee Dugard the first (several) times problems were reported, above?  Or is there another reason?


What’s happening to all these kids getting custody switches in the family law venue?


If I get a parking ticket (and I confess I have), I haven’t noticed prosecution lacking in the matter.  What about these serious crimes to society?


Why does family law not take these same behaviors when an actual parent is involved, seriously?  Does shared DNA mean they aren’t crimes?  Did it for Phil Garrido — after all, the 11 year old and 15 year old, WERE biologically his children.  He was their father…


A batterer, stalker, kidnapper, or man obsessed with a former, OVER WITH relationship, or a man not willing to live on the grid, who then again intentionally crossing the criminal line again after being confronted ONCE is a danger signal.  

The reports are already out on abduction risk factors in high-conflict custody, and they are all being stoutly ignored, too.

Now, the landscape is changed.  We are into lawlessness in the relationship, and one parent is supposed to just “deal with it” and pretend that her instincts are “off” and the courts are “on” the mark.  Maybe a few more parenting classes will assuage that gut instinct and make it go away; that’s the typical family law response, when there’s money in the family.  

When there’s not, then the idea is to prolong the litigation, but bring in government-paid professionals instead.  

There’s money in the mix somewhere, for sure and there was, I bet, in Jaycee’s years of torture, too, perpetrator and enablers alike.

It takes that village, and we’ve got one for sure, nationwide, we do.

How can we analyze policy inbetween these leading, bleeding headlines?

with one comment


Maybe if I intersperse headlines, policy talk, and commentary I can get through another day without mourning evidence of national return to stupidity day.

Man, then about 19, begets child; mother (now in other state) age not mentioned

Separation happens; Dad gets custody, Dad remarries (in which order?)

Dad has two more children and, now 34 himself, is accused of molesting his first one, now 15.

DCFS removes daughter he is allegedly molesting from his custody — SORT of, not quite!

Pissed off, or coldly determined, Dad obtains gun — or grabs one he already owns.

Before much of anything is discovered (LEST it be discovered?)

He simply heads two doors down, kills foster Dad, attempts to kill foster mother, DOES kill his own daughter,

What a life she led with her FATHER, a STEPMOTHER, two stepsiblings, and being molested, ALLEGEDLY.

SOMEONE TALKS.  She gets out, but not safe.  Now she’s dead.  

Oh yeah, and not one to go to prison, her father also shoots himself, fatally.

Her MOM was in another state — WHY?  

Just another small, friendly, Tennessee Town.

Does anyone know her brief life well enough to tell its brief story?  Because when these things happen

at home, the theme is NOT telling anyone outside the family; collusion is the order of the day.




QUIZ — from what YEAR are the orange quotes mid-article? 


Color Code:

  • light blue — quotes the article
  • black — my comments
  • orange — quotes from a different article (speech, to be precise).


Police: Dad fatally shoots daughter, foster dad


By TRAVIS LOLLER, Associated Press Writer – 31 mins ago



DYERSBURG, Tenn. – Neighbors in Tennessee are asking why a teenage girl

fatally shot by her father was placed with a foster family just two doors down

after he was accused of abusing her.   

Omitted from this lead sentence — ONE WEEK after . . . . . 

I believe one of the tags on this one might be “AFTER SHE SPEAKS UP” (if it was the daughter, or her mother, or her stepmother)

This puts a CHILL on reporting abuse…


As dads disappear, the American family is becoming significantly weaker and less capable of fulfilling

its fundamental responsibility

of nurturing and socializing children and conveying values to them.

In turn, the risks to the health and well-being of America’s children

are becoming significantly higher. 


Christopher Milburn, 34, killed the 15-year-old and her foster father and

wounded her foster mother before taking his own life Sunday, authorities said.


Sounds like a virtual honor-killing of some sort..

Children growing up without fathers, research shows, are far more likely to live in poverty,

to fail in school, to experience behavioral and emotional problems,

to develop drug and alcohol problems,

to be victims of physical abuse and neglect and, tragically, to commit suicide

{{THis being a case in point, I suppose?}}

{{The order of events is reversed.  Victims of physical (and sexual) abuse are often

turning to drugs, alcohol, and other risky behaviors as a result, per a decade-long

(and basically ignored by the fatherhood movement) Kaiser/CDC study (see blogroll to right), completed the

year before THIS quote I am inserting to this recent Tennessee tragedy.}}

Neighbor Frank Hipps said Milburn was good friends with Todd Randolph, the 46-year-old foster father,

and had worked for him in the past. Hipps, who had known both men for about eight years, said he didn’t know

the details of the abuse allegations but questioned why the girl had been placed so close.


Maybe he didn’t know them so well as he thought.

Who paid WHOM to get this daughter switched only 2 doors down, instead of the Dad switched out of the neighborhood?

Dad used to work for the foster father?  Just HOW inbred was this town, exactly?


A mature 46 year old man, foster father, married, and a daughter in the home.    

Let’s do the Father/Daughter math:  34 – 15 is HOW old was he when he got a woman pregnant?

Legally old enough:  19.  Probably just out of high school.  


“That kid shouldn’t have been in that house,” he said.


I agree.  I think she should’ve been with her mother.


“This might have been preventable if she had been placed with foster parents out of the community.”


MIGHT is true, especially if he still knew where she was ….

OR for SURE if the man had been in jail for molesting his daughters, which is where child-molesters belong, at least to start.


Neither police in Dyersburg, in northwestern Tennessee, nor child services agency spokesman Rob Johnson

would elaborate on the abuse allegations other than to say the investigation began last week.



The girl, whose name was not released, had been staying with Todd and Susan Randolph

while the state Department of Children’s Services investigated, Dyersburg Police Capt. Steve Isbell said.


WHo paid WHOM to put her there?  Come’ ON! !!!  Give the girl a fresh start!


Susan Randolph, the girl’s foster mother, was released from a Memphis hospital Monday.


Frank Hipps’ wife, Tammy, said the 15-year-old was Milburn’s daughter by a previous relationship.

He was married and the couple had two younger daughters.


The court probably saw a stable TWO-parent family, it probably had at least HEARD about 

the great crisis of fatherlessness we’ve been plagued with as a nation for the past about 15 years

(This girl was born right around the time this doctrine took nationalized, Congressionally recognized wings..

She must’ve been born around 1994.  See below.  Gee, by then, my In-the-home husband had already

started assaulting me, between babies.  WHat a coincidence that, unbeknownst to me, my government

was aware of the crisis and addressing it. . . . . Oh, excuse me, not the crisis of child molestation or

domestic violence, but of FATHERLESSNESS.


The girl’s mother was living out of state


and police were waiting for her to arrive before releasing the girl’s name, Isbell said.

Police found the teenager and Todd Randolph dead at the Randolph home and Milburn about a block away,

dead of a self-inflicted gunshot wound.


One less child molester, allegedly, OR man who didn’t trust the legal system to get the truth out of his innocence.

Guess they must do things different in Family Court in Tennessee; he’d have been FINE if he could just connect

with some PAS-theory court professional and discredit whoever was alleging the abuse.  Unless it was the girl…


Charles Wootton, 71, who lives across the street from the Randolphs, said he heard five pops. He looked out the window

and saw Randolph on the ground near the mailbox.


“My wife opened the door and walked out and seen the blood. That’s when I called 911,” he said.

Wootton said neighbors started to gather at the Randolphs’ house and a nurse performed CPR on Todd Randolph, 

who had been shot through the neck.  {{FOR THE CRIME OF . . . . . . . ??}}


Wootton said when he first looked at Susan Randolph, he thought she was dead, too.

“She told me who did it,” Wootton said.


The Randolphs have two young children who were at their grandparents’ house during the shootings, Wootton said.

Wootton had moved to the neighborhood about two weeks ago, and Todd Randolph had mowed his yard several times.

“The people around here are just about the friendliest you’ve ever met,” said Wootton. “I don’t know what happened to that guy.”





Isbell said Milburn had no criminal record in Dyersburg, a city of approximately 18,000 people about 70 miles northeast of Memphis.

Tammy Hipps said Milburn worked as a counselor at the McDowell Center for Children,

which helps at-risk and troubled children.


Well, was he falsely accused or properly accused?  

If properly, then again, let’s note here:  PERPS like places that give them access to CHILDREN, esp. troubled ones.


The shootings came just over two weeks after Jacob Levi Shaffer of Fayetteville, a small Tennessee town

near the Alabama border about.

70 miles west of Chattanooga, was accused of fatally stabbing his estranged wife,

three members of her family and a neighbor boy to death on July 18.

He also is accused of beating an acquaintance to death in nearby Huntsville, Ala.


BEFORE or AFTER she became “inexplicably” “estranged”??


Perhaps stories like these are why the word “RESPONSIBLE” was added to things like, “National Fathers Return Day?”

One Congressional discussion of which I give, below:



Lieberman, Joseph[D-CT]
Begin 1999-06-17 10:13:34
End   10:21:48
Length 00:08:14


Leading off with African Americans and teen pregnancies, he relates:


Mr. President, I want to say just a few words on the jarring statistics from that report and column for my colleagues.

Of African American children born in 1996, 70 percent were born to unmarried mothers. At least 80 percent, according to the report,

can expect to spend a significant part of their childhood apart from their fathers. 

We can take some comfort and encouragement from the fact that the teen pregnancy rate has dropped in the last few years. But the numbers cited in Mr. Kelly’s column and in the report are nonetheless profoundly unsettling, especially given what we know about the impact of fatherlessness, and indicate we are in the midst of what Kelly aptly terms a “national calamity.”

It is a calamity. Of course, it is not limited to the African American community. On any given night, 4 out of 10 children in 
this country are sleeping in homes without fathers. 



(THis mental image appears to be far less vivid than the ones of SOME fathers doing horrible things when they DID or DO live

with their children..

Like beating them.  Or having sex with them.  Or beating their mothers.  Or simply refusing to work OR help around the home.  Or,

engaging in multiple sexual relationships with other women while married. Or verbally berating a mother in front of the children.  

SOME Dads are great Dads and SOME Dads are a terror.  Likewise, SOME Moms are great Moms, and SOME Moms are negligent

or bad Moms.  It is also harder for a mother to care properly for her children, or in the best manner, which she is afraid of being assaulted

over a minor issue by the Dad when he comes home.  If he does that day.  Are these senators thinking about these images when they

shudder and are aghast at a home without a Dad).

Many homes were without Dads during the World Wars I, II, Korean War, Viet Nam War, in Iraq, Afghanistan, and many other places 

men (and women) have been sent because men decided to make war with each other, in the name of peace and democracy and self-protection.

Some homes of law enforcement officers are now without Dads in them because their Dad responded to a domestic violence dispute, and

caught a bullet, generally also taking out the attacking father as well.  

MY Dad’s home, growing up between two of the abovementioned wars was without a Dad in it because, guess what:  His Dad (a fireman),

got tired of beating his German immigrant wife and abandoned her with three children.  He witnessed this growing up.  

He went on to become a successful scientist, raise children he did NOT beat (at least I wasn’t and I never saw my siblings taking this),

studied hard, worked hard, sent ALL children not just to, but also through college also, and left an inheritance.  And provide for, from what

I am told/understand, not only his own mother, but also a younger brother who never quite got it together, possibly related to something that

happened when he WAS with that abusive Dad, or what, I was never told.  That brother also served his country as a soldier, and died before his time,

never having married or had children.

My Dad NEVER put his children (all daughters) in contact with the abusing/beating/abandoning father, ever, in his lifetime.  

I never regretted this, that I can recall.  How can you regret something you never saw, where the only thing you knew about him was,

he beat the grandmother that I DID know (a little bit).  

However, while Sen. Lieberman was making this speech, about a decade ago, I was for the first time in a full decade of substantial

domestic violence in MY daughters’ lives, with them at an overnight, stay-away camp, a music camp, which we had managed to get 

to no thinks from the father who never left.  For two weeks, I was not going to be abused at night and was around people who actually

treated me respectfully, and I worked along side them in my profession.  We had had a real push getting up there, and were punished 

soundly for having left, but during that week and seeing the response to us getting free from abuse for only (and not entirely; there was

a dour-faced, rules-of-camp breaking midweek visit, where $20 was casually tossed at me so I might have enough gas to get back home)

I MADE UP MY MIND that this domestic violence restraining order was GOING to be filed, and I’m “out of here.”  

How ironic that i didn’t know what was being prated and pronounced in Washington, D.C. at this time.


Here’s the rest of this little 8 minute speech, in case you WOULD like the names of some of the prominent thinkers behind this

June 1999 presentation to the President of the United States, and get a glimpse inside the working of great, Constitution-respecting, minds

when left unsupervised in the Capital of our beloved country:



We can take some comfort and encouragement from the fact that the teen pregnancy rate has dropped

in the last few years. But the numbers cited in Mr. Kelly’s column and in the report are nonetheless

profoundly unsettling, especially given what we know about the impact of fatherlessness,

{{Gee, that must have been a grass-roots appeal from the teen mothers for help, or their mothers, or 

theirs sisters.  WHERE did this knowledge about the impact of fatherless come from, given the

establishment in 1994 of:  (A) The Violence Against Women Act (help some women leave, rather than

stay, in abusive, dangerous relationships) and (B) Also in 1994, the National Fatherhood Initiative.
(Should I compare months of incorporation as  nonprofit with the passage of the law?)}} 


and indicate we are

in the midst of what Kelly aptly terms a “national calamity.” It is a calamity. Of course, it is not limited to

the African American community. On any given night, 4 out of 10 children in this country are sleeping in homes without fathers.

(CONTINUED QUOTE, in different format..):

At the end of this column, Michael Kelly asks: How could this happen 

in a Nation like ours? And he wonders if anyone is paying attention. 


Well, the fact is that people are beginning to pay attention, although 

it tends to be more people at the grassroots level who are actively 

seeking solutions neighborhood by neighborhood.


{{Evidence being…..  WHO?? Time frame?  Organizations?  Written declarations by any of these?}}


The best known of these groups  {{in fact the ONLY one named here..}}



is called the National Fatherhood Initiative.



{{Possibly because of its funding? and prominence of who’s in it?}}


I think it has  made tremendous progress in recent years {{CONTEXT 1994-1999}}

in raising awareness of  father absence and its impact on our society and in mobilizing a 

national effort to promote responsible fatherhood. 


Per the HHS TAGGS search on its name:

Fiscal Year Grantee Name State Award Number Award Title CFDA Number Sum of Actions

And for column width, same search (common field:  Award# / CFDA Code) 


Fiscal Year Award Number Action Issue Date CFDA Number CFDA Program Name Award Activity Type Award Action Type Principal Investigator Sum of Actions
2008  90FB0001  09/25/2008  93086  Healthy marriage Promotion and Responsible Fatherhood Grants  DEMONSTRATION  NON-COMPETING CONTINUATION  CHRISTHOPHER BEARD  $ 999,534 
2007  90FB0001  09/21/2007  93086  Healthy marriage Promotion and Responsible Fatherhood Grants  DEMONSTRATION  NON-COMPETING CONTINUATION  CHRISTHOPHER BROWN  $ 999,534 
2006  90FB0001  09/25/2006  93086  Healthy marriage Promotion and Responsible Fatherhood Grants  DEMONSTRATION  NEW  CHRISTHOPHER BROWN  $ 999,534 
2001  90XP0023  04/09/2001  93647  Social Services Research and Demonstration  SOCIAL SERVICES  NEW  HEATHER THURMAN  $ 500,000 

I’d DONE data entry before, and typing.  Do you know what the odds of someone even on no sleep, and having a sugar buzz, making THAT many

mistakes in 4 entries (fatherhood, responsible, and public, plus “Christopher” spelled wrong.  Same grant, 3rd year, “Christhopher Brown” entered a

samesex marriage, apparently and changed last name “Brown” to his partner’s name “Beard”? 

This database exists so the public can search on it.  Hmmm……  I wonder if they know to search for misspelled names…. and key terms.





AND SINCE 2000– seen below:

Funding for the “Father Organization” in this “national effort”



Bar chart: info duplicated below as table



 93.086: Healthy Marriage Promotion and Responsible Fatherhood Grants $1,999,068


However the funding for the wild oats it sowed, under this # 93.086:


(I JUST LEARNED) I believe that this code only arose (emerged naturally of course) in about 2006.  However, as of 2009,

it is still not a searchable agency code on the USASPENDING.gov.  Either in listing “all” programs, or under the agency it belongs under







Hmmm — $2 million less in California for our shelters?  (yes, yes, I realize this is federal, not state, spending).


2000-2009 NFI Funding:  (See bar chart):  Well, I guessed this may not be responsible “Spelling” on whoever entered the data,

but . . . . 




When we simply search only the word

fatherhood” under “recipient” for FY2000-2009,

we get an entirely different picture (also diff’t database):




Top 5 Known Congressional Districts where Recipients are Located Known Congressional District help link

 District of Columbia nonvoting (Eleanor Holmes Norton) $6,942,352
 Maryland 08 (Constance A. Morella / Chris Van Hollen) $2,625,112

Yes this is definitely an “up from the people” grassroots movement,

and not a DC.-down

initiative, surely.  They are just responding to (a certain sector) of their constitutents, and from Washington, acting on it.  I know straight out of

getting out of my house safe, the FIRST thing on my mind was telling Washington, I needed (well, another) father in the home, since now 

I was a “female-headed” household and my children, while this Domestic Violence Restraining order was in effect, were sleeping in a fatherless

home and in danger of (NOT) learning the rights values.  They were learning that that stuff they witnessed growing up was illegal.  And how to

leave a dangerous relationship and start to recover.  

Of course, family court was there waiting for them to go UNlearn those values, fast, and that the 14th Amendment is just a theory.



Top 10 Recipients



93647 word “fatherhood”

 Was that misspelling intentional?  I mean, it WOULD complicate a search by Award Title

Searching, CFDA 93647 (Not the CFDA actually assigned the word “fatherhood” in its description) & word “fatherhood” (“keyword in award title”):

I”ll split in 2, so it displays better:

Exact same search, different fields, so you can see grantee, principal investigators….




“It did this ALL on its own altruistic self, and I’m just reporting on it here.”

The President (is this the same one that signed that 1995 proclamation? about fatherhood?)


SEARCH ON ALL grants, with only the word “fatherhood” in the grant (not grantee) title, produced

358 records, of which here are the 1995-1999 ones:



1995  ST. BERNANDINE’S HEAD START  BALTIMORE  MD  Non-Profit Public Non-Government Organizations  90PR0002  RESPONSIBLE FATHERHOOD PROJECTS  93647  DEMONSTRATION  NEW  $ 85,000 


Notice the variety of recipients, including Universities (this will be useful for later “evidence-based data” resulting from grants to study the topic.


Notice that the TYPE of grants appears to be either “new” or “noncompeting.”  Hmmm.


AND NOW Sen Lieberman is reporting on this grassroots movement.



Along with a group of allies, the National Fatherhood Initiative has 

been establishing educational programs in hundreds of cities and 

towns across America.

It has pulled together bipartisan task forces in 

the Senate, the House, and among the Nation’s Governors and 




YES< there’s ONE thing that a bipartisan majority male Congress and the Nation’s (also primarily male,

if I’m not mistaken??) can unite on, and that the problem with the nation

relates to a lack of male (father) influence on young children throughout the land.


Presumably, these children that are spending, probably, the majority of their waking hours

in school, are not connecting with any decent father figures or adult males and learning from them

good values.


I wonder what the male/female ratio of teachers is in the nation’s elementary and high schools….



It has worked with us to explore public policies that 

encourage and support the efforts of fathers to become more involved 

in the lives of their children. 

Last Monday, the National Fatherhood Initiative held its annual 

(FIFTH?) national fatherhood summit here in Washington. At that summit, Gen. 

Colin Powell, and an impressive and wide-ranging group of experts 

and advocates, talked in depth about the father absence crisis in our 

cities and towns and brainstormed about what we can do to turn this 

troubling situation around. 



And Last June, 2009 President OBAMA, had a “town hall on fatherhood”

which was visited by a major representative in the Violence Against Women movement

(see last post).  15 years later, these articles are still leading, suicides (NOT by the troubled

teens, bu tby at times the fathers who troubled them….) are still happening.  Well, the

doctrine’s NOT about to change, it must because THAT murderous, suicide-committing father

HIMSELF had no father model in his life.




There are limits to what we in Government can do to meet this 

challenge and advance the cause of responsible fatherhood because, 



Because — Because — Because, “regretfully” I supposed according to this point of view,

the FOUNDING Fathers put LIMITS to government into the U.S. Constitution,** and a few

MORE also made their way into the Bill of Rights as Amendments.


(**To appreciate the link — or be tempted to read it, hover cursor over it)


I can’t WAIT til the “Equal Rights” Amendment makes it in, if it ever will.

Of course I would settle for an enforced and respected 14th Amendment:


after all, it is hard to change people’s attitudes and behaviors and 

values through legislation.


Possibly because the purpose of legislation is to express THEIR attitudes, by laws they voted on,

or their elected representatives did.  Possibly because the purpose of government is to PROTECT

the inalienable rights of citizens….


But that doesn’t mean we are powerless, 



Yes, time has shown that the federal grants systems, and initiatives, and private deliberations IS a 

way to get around the danged legislation that has made “us” (Who all agree about this fatherhood crisis)

so “powerless.”


nor does it mean we can afford not to try to lessen the impact of a 

problem that is literally eating away at our country. 


How do you know it’s a PROBLEM and not a SYMPTOM of another problem?


In recent times, we have had a great commonality of concern 

expressed in the ideological breadth of the fatherhood promotion 

effort both here in the Senate and our task force, but underscored by 

statements that the President, the Vice President, and the Secretary 

of Health and Human Services have made on this subject in recent 

years. Indeed, I think President Clinton most succinctly expressed the 

importance of this problem when he said: {{in 1995….?}}}


The single biggest social problem in our society may be the growing 

absence of fathers from their children’s homes because it contributes 

to so many other social problems. 


Again, in your opinion, supported by government-funded research with the premise already supposed.






(FOR REFERENCE:  This was the Monica Lewinsky president, right?

Well, I guess we can overlook that because he has just flown to North Korea,

with a shock of white hair and looking dignified (and leaner) to attempt to retrieve

two FEMALE journalists sentenced to 12 years of hard labor.  I hope he succeeds.

However, his signing of that 1995 Memo sentenced women here locally to some unbelievable

long-term trauma, because of its chilling effect on the 14th Amendment (and others)

and the placement of daughters and sons in the household of men who abused (or are

abusing) either them, OR previously their mothers) (case in point).

So there are some things we can and should be trying to do. I am 

pleased to note our colleagues, Senators BAYH, DOMENICI, and 

others have been working to develop a legislative proposal, which I 

think contains some very constructive and creative approaches




Yup, parTICULARLY creative with the laws, due process, and the titling of the

various grants involved.  Let alone the use of them, or the monitoring of their use

if any indeed actually takes place.





in which the Federal Government would support financially, with 

resources, some of these very promising grassroots father-promotion 



WOULD support?  WOULD support?

Check HHS’s CFDA# 93.086, “promoting responsible fatherhood and healthy marriage” for yourself on THIS site:


http://usaspending.gov (under “SPENDING” “GRANTS”)


and also encourage and enact the removal of some of the 

legal and policy barriers that deter men from an active presence in their children’s lives. 






Another thing I think we can do to help is to use the platform we 

have on the Senate floor–this people’s forum –to elevate this 

problem on the national agenda. That is why Senator GREGG and I 

have come to the floor today. I am particularly grateful for the 

cosponsorship of the Senator from New Hampshire, because he is the 

chairman of the Senate Subcommittee on Children and Families.





We are joined by a very broad and bipartisan group of cosponsors which 

includes Senators BAYH, 




AKAKA. I thank them all for joining in the introduction of this special 

resolution this morning, which is to honor Father’s Day coming this 



but also to raise our discussion of the problem of absent fathers in 

our hopes for the promotion of responsible fatherhood. 


Senator GREGG indicated this resolution would declare this Sunday’s 

holiday as National Fathers Return Day and call on dads around the 

country to use this day, particularly if they are absent, to reconnect 

and rededicate themselves to their children’s lives, to understand and 

have the self-confidence to appreciate how powerful a contribution 

they can make to the well-being of the children that they have helped 

to create, and to start by spending this Fathers’ Day returning for 

part of 

the day to their children and expressing to their children the love they 

have for them and their willingness to support them. [Page: S7164] 





The statement we hope to make this morning in this resolution 

obviously will not change the hearts and minds of distant or 

disengaged fathers, but those of us who are sponsoring the resolution 

hope it will help to spur a larger national conversation about the 

importance of fatherhood and help remind those absent fathers of 

their responsibilities, yes, but also of the opportunity they have to 

change the life of their child, about the importance of their 

fatherhood, and also help remind these absent 

fathers of the value of their involvement.


We ask our colleagues to join us in supporting this resolution, and 

adopting it perhaps today but certainly before this week is out to 

make as strong a statement as possible and to move us one step 

closer to the day when every American child has the opportunity to 

have a truly happy Father’s Day because he or she will be spending it 

with their father. 

I thank the Chair. I yield the floor.

Just for a reminder:

 – Slavery Abolished. Ratified 12/6/1865. History

1. Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted,

shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.

2. Congress shall have power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation.

 – Citizenship Rights. Ratified 7/9/1868. Note History   

1. All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States

and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens

of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law;

nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.


WELL, wordcount 5216, enough for today.







A Radical Idea — Enforce Existing Custody Laws . . and the rest…

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This post is in response to, gradually, retroactively, discovering what was published, conferenced, said, explicated, implicated, rationalized, demonstrated, and nationalized during the past ten (or so) years since I filed a domestic violence restraining order, and found out that this person was NOT an isolated, deeply disturbed, person, but was in fact living out a systematic creed, which thrived better in certain types of schizoid linguistic neighborhoods than others — such as, faith institutions and family court.  

It is not one of my better posts, except for a few graphics.  HOWEVER, I do feel it’s truthful.

What one wants, in the field of Domestic Violence, is STOPPING it.  Not theory, but results.

However, unlike in, say music, where there is a range of audiences, many of them who pay, in THIS field, there is a fountain of funding for theorists.  Not content to actually work on getting laws enforced, and saving lives, there is constant, constant tinkering, reframing, training, talking and (you get the picture).  Well, if you don’t, here’s one:


This pie chart shows Federal Spending by Federal Department:



(legend at the link).  PURPLE is Health and Human Services.  RUST– is Education  

RUST is what we were supposed to learn from “Zero to 5” and from “K-12” (and beyond) but didn’t about behavior ethics and character, as well as the usual academic whatnot (reading, writing, counting, obeying rules, doing homework, working hard, and not joining gangs or impregnating/getting impregnated before one is, say at least 16 or 17 years old….)  

PURPLE — that’s primarily catchup, at this point -_ healthy families, responsible fatherhood, early heard start, child development, and many many more things (Including some fantastic funding for more scientific research, medical, and so forth).

Despite the majority of federal spending going there, we are behind in education, and people are still killing spouses and/or children after divorce, or over the issue of child support, even.  Children are kidnapped over these issues, traumatizing them and burdening society further.  

Grants, once established, are like the energizer battery, and just keep on going, going, going for the most part.  WHO is reporting WHAT as to the results?

Are results measured by people who go through the programs (a headcount) or by the headlines?  As finances are a major predictor and risk factor in otherwise stressed relationships, perhaps we ought to find out what’s happening to these finances. 


SO, I put it this way,. . . . 

If a “lightbulb” going off signifies “Aha!” — understanding, my question is, . . . 


How many social science, legal, and

court-associated experts does it take

to UNscrew a lightbulb?




My experience, and others’, and the headlines, show that frequent contact with a batterer, including frequent visitation

(however supervised, however accessed, however negotiated) can be hazardous to your physical and mental health.


I never got supervised.  As a consequence, I consistently was traumatized, stalked, harrassed, and lost work — and eventually children around this.  Because I knew this to be a NOT safe situation, I had to choose between seeing my children, ever (even when court had ordered it), and working steadily, EVER, basically.  The exchange was not a 15 minute exchange with court orders poorly written as mine, and going to court to fix this had never resulted in anything (in my case) but significant loss.  

It was a traumatic and awful experience every time except for THE first time, when I finally got  domestic violence restraining order with kickout and had a little space to begin repairing and rebuilding every area of life this battering thing had knocked out of kilter, including work, relationships, and physically, aspects of the house (not to mention my health).  

Now, to find out later, how MANY experts had been practicing how MANY ideas in which areas of the United States (and the funding they got to do this), and how LITTLE actual input from litigants seems to have been sought — a typical list of what are called “stakeholders” doesn’t include the people affected MOST directly:  Moms, Dads, and Children.  No, the stakeholders, in some people’s view, are the professionals — well it’s saddening they need SO much training to figure out what I (and others) could have easily told them — and what’s already on the rules of court, samples of which I link to below.


BUT, now,  

Here comes yet another federal grant to explicate, reframe, and contextualize what the rest of us know needs to be simply STOPPED:


Development of a Framework for Identifying and Explicating the Context of Domestic Violence in Custody Cases and its Implications for Custody Determinations

BWJP has been invited to apply for a grant from the Office on Violence Against Women for (1) a demonstration project to develop (2) a framework to guide custody and visitation decisions in cases involving domestic violence.  Research on custody and visitation determinations provide(3)troubling evidence that procedures currently in use in family courts often fail to(4) identify, contextualize and account for the  occurrence of domestic violence in these cases, and if identified, (5) its presence seems not to consistently affect the court’s recommendations regarding custody or visitation arrangements.

(My numbers, and color coding, added for commentary, below)….


Let me translate:


First of all “Demonstration project” means that a few areas around the country will be targeted for experimentation with some new policies (the litigants are generally not going to be told, incidentally).  Then, apart again from LITIGANT feedback, as in “we are running a demonstration project and would like your feedback”, but rather, taken from things such as mediation, evaluation, and other statistical reports-from-the-courts (etc.), someone you have never heard of will (without your input) describe, evaluate, and report on this grant.  (sometimes there is an uncomfortably close relationship between people GETTING the grants and people EVALUATING the grants).

After that, depending on how that reporting went, it will be expanded nationwide, at government expense, usually.

ONE THING GETS OMITTED:  Lots of poor people don’t have internet access, or time to research who’s doing what about them. One aspect of violence is isolation and intentional breakdown of infrastructure.  Trust me, (or don’t), most women don’t stick around for abuse, given other viable ways to get out of it.  At some point, one figures out the abuser ain’t going to change, and the question then, if not at survival level yet, becomes safest exit.  If it is sensed that this exit is about to happen, the controls tighten.  TRUST ME, they do.  


“A framework to guide custody and visitation decisions.”

? ? ?


There already IS a framework in place:  Laws, and rules of court.


A).  Laws.  These laws were passed by elected representatives in legislatures, and as such, that’s a fairly FAIR process.  When it comes to domestic violence, SOME of these include the word “rebuttable presumption against” and are followed by phrases such as “custody” or “joint custody” and the word “batterer.”

HALFWAY or less through family court process, I figured I’d get smart and look up the pertinent LAWS.  Silly me, I didn’t know about the system of federal grants, policies, and that I lived in a nation with a national religion called “Designer Families.”  

My point is:  There is NOT a need to continue doing this.  The framework exists.  The only reason to continue conferring more and more is, I can only deduce, to further undermine and restructure it.  OUT OF PUBLIC HEARING.  . . .. .    

Here’s one law(among many) that was deliberately ignored in my case:


278.  Every person, not having a right to custody, who maliciously
takes, entices away, keeps, withholds,or conceals a child and 
maliciously deprives a lawful custodian of a right to custody, 
or a person of a right to visitation, shall be
punished by imprisonment in a county jail not exceeding one year, a
fine not exceeding one thousand dollars ($1,000), or both that fine
and imprisonment, or by imprisonment in the state prison for 16
months, or two or three years, a fine not exceeding ten thousand
dollars ($10,000), or both that fine and imprisonment
(b) Nothing contained in this section limits the court's contempt
   (c) A custody order obtained after the taking, enticing away,
keeping, withholding, or concealing of a child does not constitute a
defense to a crime charged under this section.

This single law was the framework that crumbled about 1-1/2 years prior to my starting this blog.  

Along with the pre-existing (to that crime) employment.  I guess someone had been explicating and 
training court personnel out of remembering this, and instead to reward this (criminal) endeavor
with a custody switch.
The law is fairly reasonable in certain areas pertaining to domestic violence. For example, it’s either a misdemeanor or a felony.
I’m not sure whether child abuse could EVER be less than a felony, but in some venues it’s getting a little hard to tell. Probably, as I say,
they are conferencing about how to figure out which is which, and whether they should report, intervene, or ignore. Or apply
“therapeutic jurisprudence” to the entire family unit because ONE of them committed a bunch of misdemeanor or felony crimes.


B) Rules of court.  Although I was clueless that these existed for most of my case, someone was kind eventually and sent me the list of the local ones, so I KNEW what had been done wrong in my case from start to finish.  Now I’m so smart, I even know who makes these rules.  There are rules to insure due process, and there ARE rules directed TO mediators about the quality of orders coming out of this.

I was shocked when I read mine.  The california ones are at:  http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/rules

HECK, if you scroll down, you can even read the Code of Judicial Ethics, too.


California Rules of Court
Title One. Rules Applicable to All Courts (Rules 1.1 – 1.200) HTML | PDF(190 KB)
Title Two. Trial Court Rules (Rules 2.1 – 2.1100) HTML | PDF(952 KB)
Title Three. Civil Rules (Rules 3.1 – 3.2120) HTML | PDF(1832 KB)
Title Four. Criminal Rules (Rules 4.1 – 4.601) HTML | PDF(5819 KB)
Title Five. Family and Juvenile Rules (Rules 5.1 – 5.830) HTML | PDF(3518 KB)
Title Six. [Reserved] PDF (84 KB)
Title Seven. Probate Rules (Rules 7.1 – 7.1101) HTML | PDF(5978 KB)
Title Eight. Appellate Rules (Rules 8.1 – 8.1125) HTML | PDF(3208 KB)
Title Nine. Rules on Law Practice, Attorneys, and Judges (Rules 9.1 – 9.61) HTML | PDF(549 KB)
Title Ten. Judicial Administration Rules (Rules 10.1 – 10.1030) HTML | PDF(2113 KB)
Standards of Judicial Administration (Standards 2.1 – 10.80) HTML | PDF(775 KB)
Ethics Standards for Neutral Arbitrators in Contractual Arbitration PDF (101 KB)
Appendix A: Judicial Council Legal Forms List PDF (510 KB)
Appendix B: Liability Limits of a Parent or Guardian Having Custody and Control of a Minor for the Torts of a Minor PDF (14 KB)
Appendix C: Guidelines for the Operation of Family Law Information Centers and Family Law Facilitator Offices PDF (27 KB)
Alternative Format: Complete California Rules of Court in PDF format, compressed into a single .ZIP file. ZIP of PDF Files
(updated: 7/1/2009, 6.79 MB)


Code of Judicial Ethics
Formal standards of conduct for judges and candidates for judicial office.




“procedures currently in use in family court”

Does this mean procedures, as in those that the rules of court mandate, or procedures, as in what actually takes place?



“identify, contextualize and account for”

Excuse me, “contextualize”???  Maybe the new rules of court will explain this a little better.  Does that mean, did the little child see it or not see it, or were they hit in the process?  Does this mean, “in context” it was justifiable, I.e., “the devil made me do it!,” or “temporary insanity,” whereas, say, in a criminal or civil court, it would be the mundane misdemeanor worthy of some court action?  



its presence seems not to consistently affect the court’s recommendations regarding custody or visitation arrangements.

I’d have to say that’s false.  Reporting and identifying this appears to have the result that custody is often switched, according to a document (which I BELIEVE I linked to from BWJP’s site, although I would have to track back on this one).


Family courts traumatize battered women and hand custody to their abusers 37 percent of the time, finds a report released today (5/2008) by the Voices of Women Organizing Project. Latest story in our “Dangerous Trends, Innovative Responses” series.

“The courts’ own rules and regulations are often not followed,” Lob said. “Those kinds of things just seem so blatantly unfair and unreasonable.”

Eighty percent said their abusers used the courts to follow through on a threat to gain sole custody of the children and prevent the children from being in contact with their mothers.

Women were advised, sometimes by lawyers, not to mention domestic violence in one-quarter of cases, and not to challenge custody for fear of worsening the situation.

“To me, that’s the shocking thing,” Lob said. “We’re in a position where it’s actually sound advice for a woman not to raise these issues.”

Fifty-eight percent of women said that asking for child support triggered retaliation from their abusers.

I have personally talked myself into two conferences which were ABOUT people like me, but not FOR people like me.  While these were tremendously validating and exciting (plus I spoke some informally at one of them), I was in the heat of the battle at the time (and losing total contact with my kids, but — barely — retaining the remaining single job that had survived the last round) – – BUT, I repeat, they weren’t typically inviting people like me.  You have to research, knock, call, send away and beg (generally speaking, after a certain point in the family law process, someone is going to be destitute.  it is simply not possible to stay in that system, be stripped of protection, and maintain a livelihood, without some extreme support or ingenious ways of getting basic needs handled.

Add to this that some of the long, drawn-out custody battles come after leaving a systematic abuser, which before separation can really wear out a person, it gets kinda interesting maintaining some work momentum.

ANYHOW, now, being a little better networked (referring to internet access AND knowing other people), I have found many of the:

  • foundations
  • publications
  • organizations
  • websites
  • key authors
  • key concepts

. . . . . and so forth, that like to talk about what I call “us,” meaning, Mothers Determined to Leave Domestic Violence (WITH kids).

It’s like any other life skill, or professional skill — after say 10 years of extensive exposure (immersion style), networking, reading, and so forth, one gets a little bit of fluency.  I mean, that’s how I learned math, music, langauges, other things.  Same deal here.  

But unlike some other fields, for example music — I don’t think people at the top of this field typically are tone-deaf or unable to play a single instrument.  If they compose, often they can play many.  What one wants in this field is SOUND.


There are already laws about domestic violence as it pertains to custody.

There are already rules of court about mediation, not that I am in favor of mandated mediation at any point in time.

There are rules of court about what can go in in court.  For example, a judge should not be taking testimony — and making decisions based on it — from someone who is not under oath, which happened in my case.  

A judge should not make a critical decision (for example, switching custody) following criminal behavior regarding custody.  There should not be partiality, and in particular, when threatening behavior clearly intended to obstruct justice has been reported, that took place outside the courtroom, this should raise an eyebrow.  I had reported stalking, and submitted a signed eyewitness account.  It was filed and ignored.

 A judge should also give the legal and factual basis on which a decision is made when directly (in writing) requested to by an attorney, which the one in my case did not.  

A mediator should take a few minutes to actually ascertain readily available (and relevant) facts before spouting off.  

Now, as to the niceties of IS it domestic violence, or is it NOT domestic violence, and was THAT assault, THAT court order violation, THAT threat, or THAT child abuse as reported by CPS, a D.A., or anyone else, REALLY harmful to the child?  – – –  why, exactly, are all these volumes of press, books, conferences, etc. being written?  

I see it as simple.  Don’t HIT, don’t STALK, don’t THREATEN, don’t HARASS, don’t Destroy property of, and (whatever else the protective order reads in the particular case).  It’s REALLY in basic, high school English, and doesn’t require extensive interpretation, does it, REALLY?

Another one should be obvious — don’t lie in court, or on the record, then when caught in a BIG one, make up a new one.  If this goes on repeatedly, do judges need to attend institutes and conferences in order to be trained how to notice this?  

SO JUST ASK ME — I’ll explain it real clear to any attorney, judge, mediator, or any one else who is still unclear that the 3-letter word “law” means “law,” and that the 5-letter word “order” means “order,” and the 7-letter word “custody” means “custody.”    I have been a parent, and a teacher, and I”m not TOO confused on this generally speaking.  I don’t wing it constantly, veer radically back and forth between whether I actually expect a standard to count, or not count. When learning a new skill, I focus on that one and “call” it consistently (speaking in group situations) til the point gets home.  

The skill someone who has been systematically been engaging in domestic violence, which is the word VIOLENCE in it, and which includes a pattern of coercive behavior that violates boundaries (and law), and generally in “order” to give “orders” to the victim.  The physical attacks (threats, intimidation, property destruction, punishments, animal abuse, isolation, and a whole other array of possible intentionally  humiliating and dependency-inducing behavior towards another adult — OR child) have been compared to “POW” techniques.  They are not consistent, so the person is kept on edge as to what may provoke what.  Sometimes, a person can’t handle this, and provokes an explosion intentionally rather than live in the tense buildup, anticipation, and fear.  It may be the one thing they CAN control in the situation.  BUT, overall, what it’s “ABOUT” is giving orders.  Period.  Hapazardly.  Basically, it’s tyranny.


I never was unclear about this for long.  Not the first or second time one gets hit in the home — the dynamic is basically clear.  

NOW — here we are “out” and this pattern of attempting to give orders, on the part of the former batterer, continues.  WHAT is the obvious safe solution?  The obvious need is to send a clear, clear message to this individual that he (or she) is now NOT in control and allowed to manipulate and give orders, instead he (or she), is now in the position of TAKING orders from a higher authority — the courts, backed up by police and the threat of arrest/jail.  This is THE primary need at this time.  

How does family law handle it instead?  I found out, the exact opposite way.  So, I found myself, during exchanges, repeatedly explaining to the various personnel involved (including police officers, who failed to get it) that the any ORDERS I was now under were the existing court orders, and I expected them to be adhered to so I could live a sane life.  Between me, and the father of the girls, there was never any lack of clarity in the situation.  Observed over a period of years (in family law), a court order would be obtained, and violated the FIRST weekend (or day) after its issuance.  He was acting like a two-year old, testing boundaries, and getting his right to violate every time.

When a woman then puts her foot down in this manner, SHE is labeled, and the whole “thing” is labeled as “high-conflict.”

Well of course it’s high-conflict!  Did we expect such a batterer to lie down and play passive easily?  When someone is not looking?  

Someone who’s gotten away with mayhem, which brings attention and benefits (compliance), and this is confronted, there is going to be conflict.  That doesn’t mean it’s a two-way conflict.  If the courts would simply pay attention to the situation instead of trying to be so “smart” all the time, more people would survive.  IN plain English, this means, fewer would die.  NO ONE should have to die for leaving a violent or abusive marriage, and expecting their children to be protected – – and their rights respected — also.

But they do.  


Domestic violence per se can be and often is, lethal.  It often escalates without warning, and without intervention (including separation)

basically ONLY escalates.  Mediation is inadvisable in these cases, and joint custody is a recipe for societal trauma, and debt upon debt.

Mediation is MANDATORY in my area.  I can document (now) how our particular mediator violated the rules of court at every opportunity.

SOMEWHERE (i read it) it says that a “spousal batterer” IS a clear and present danger to the physical AND mental health of the citizens of (this state, although technically we are US Citizens, not State citizens).  

Study after study — including of substance abusers of various sorts (i refer to Acestudy.org, again), of prostitutes, of adult abusers or victims, and people with significant difficulties later in life (including in forming healthy relationships) – – shows that a violent, battering parent is NOT a good role model.  The light bulb is already screwed in for the real stakeholders — those whose lives are at stake.


But the experts are not done yet . . . . .  Even though things are already in the law.

FINALLY, the lightbulbs are going off in MY understanding as to why they won’t go off in people’s understanding whose children and lives are NOT at risk in a volatile situation, and who can (safe from the hearing of litigants or custodial mothers, in particular, or domestic violence survivors — or the children who are being molested on regular exchanges with a noncustodial parent  — and so forth) :    If the light bulb went off, where would they publish?  Who would pay them to train the advocates, the judges, the attorneys, the mediators, and the psychologists?  WHO would travel around the country and the world to discuss, well people that sometimes have trouble traveling 5-10 miles down the road to see their own kids on a weekend?  (case in point).



Here’s another reference I ran across researching something else:  






The 37-page original is downloadable.  These pages have footnotes.  It is well worth a read.  Here is the cover page:


There are organizations (and the author here is on the board of one of them) who appear — I’ll take responsibility and qualify “to me,” although I am certainly not the only person of this opinion — to be HIGHLY invested in reframing the issue of Domestic Violence (and joint custody after it) from being a terrible role model for children, and experience for either parent, into something that people can be “counseled” out of.  Supervised visitation is touted as a “solution” to this problem.  People have been killed around supervised visitation, and the literature on this acknowledges it.  Still, it’s ordered, and sometimes used as penalties for parents reporting their fears, or hurt to their children.  

One has to ask why/  The ONLY reason i can come up with, primarily, is it’s a GREAT profession talking (and publishing) about what to do, and it’s also a great profession, “parenting classes.”  There is little to no substantial evidence that even domestic violence (batterers intervention) classes change a spouse highly invested in the coercive control dynamic.  Newspapers OFTEN report murders occuring shortly after someone was cleared from a DV class — or had violated a restraining order multiple times, without incarceration. The latest high-profile one I can think of (in California) was Danielle Keller and “Porn King” Mitchell (which I’ve blogged about recently).  One in about 2005 that absolutely frightened me was a stalker — just a boyfriend relationship — the woman he was stalking, her body was found in the car trunk a few days after passing with flying colors the latest set of “classes.”

That’s playing Russian Roulette with people’s lives.  I object, on behalf of my life, and  my kids, and others, to this policy, of trying to “ascertain” who could and who could not benefit from counseling.  I counsel strict consequences for domestic violence, which is a lesson in itself.

Regarding Expert Conferences (this, and others, and others, and others) – – –   MOST domestic violence victims simply can’t afford to attend them!  We can’t afford to subscribe to their publications, and our opinions are NOT asked — in a truly collaborative sense — in these matters.  If they were, we’d say, probably to a woman, as mothers:  “JUST SAY NO!”


Domestic violence includes economic abuse, and often access to the internet, or internet skills CAN be an ongoing issue.  I  know that in my situation, I was discouraged from using the PC unless it contributed directly to family income (his), and even in one case, I had to turn down a stable source of income from home to accommodate his desire to keep me without electronic contact with the outside world.  When I finally obtained it, at around $8, or was it $18 (DNR)/month, I remember shuddering with fear as the vehicle pulled into the driveway, and praying that my internet would be turned off before he got in the front door.  I had at this time worked substantial office support jobs and was internet fluent.  


Another reason our voices are often not heard — not really — is that we do not have sufficient funding to take the time and write, post, publish, and attend conferences.  If we have children, we are taking care of them, and ourselves.  If we do NOT have children, the priority is getting back to them.  And if we are domestic violence survivors of any substantial length (OR are in court with such an ex-partner or ex-spouse), it is pretty well guaranteed sheer economic survival is an ongoing issue.  


Currently, I am reaching an overload on some of these topics, emotionally — and also have the situation to handle, which is not yet final, either.  Support systems are constantly eroded til one begins to wonder what the prime identity is.  We may trust people we know individually and personally, but after a certain point, one gets very jaundiced about organizations, ESPECIALLY nonprofit organizations promising help.


One of the best primers I am aware of on custody issues with batterers is called “The Batterer As Parent” (Bancroft/Silverman, Sage, Thousand Oaks 2002).  It’s coming up on 7 years since it was published.  I’ve personally heard a domestic violence expert, whose job it was to testify in criminal cases, say that this is a classic.  I have this book, and my copy is dog-eared.  It talks about ALL the things that the family law system as a whole absolutely REFUSES to do — support the nonabusive parent in her — or his — relationship with the children.  Be wary of the risk of kidnapping (in my case, the court literally not only failed to act to protect my kids from this, after I requested it, but also failed to acknowledge it — WHEN IT HAPPENED!  It talks about being aware that batterers are often chronic and convincing liars, and also of the overlap with incest perpetration.  

Here are some of the ‘Scholarly” cites of this book:

Characteristics of court-mandated batterers in four cities: Diversity and dichotomies

EW Gondolf – Violence Against Women, 1999 – vaw.sagepub.com
 1283 TABLE 2 Family Status and Parents’ Behavior of Batterers in Four Cities (in
percentages) Batterer Program Pittsburgh Denver Houston Dallas Total  
Cited by 63 – Related articles – All 3 versions


Men who batter: some pertinent characteristics.

FJMS FITCH, A Papantonio – Journal of Nervous & Mental Disease, 1983 – jonmd.com
 The authors report statistics on five major correlates of such men: violence between
the batterer’s parents, abuse of the batterer when he was a child, alcohol  
Cited by 52 – Related articles – All 3 versions



Supervised visitation in cases of domestic violence

 – ouhsc.edu [PDF] 
M Sheeran, S Hampton – Juvenile and Family Court Journal, 1999 – HeinOnline
 remain: visitation centers are not a guarantee of safety for vulnerable family members;
they do little to improve the ability of a batterer to parent in a  
Cited by 23 – Related articles – BL Direct – All 3 versions


Legal and policy responses to children exposed to domestic violence: The need to …

PG Jaffe, CV Crooks, DA Wolfe – Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review, 2003 – Springer
 REFERENCES Bancroft, L., & Silverman, JG (2002). The batterer as parent.
Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage. Brown, T. (2000). Charging and  
Cited by 19 – Related articles – BL Direct – All 3 versions


Childhood family violence history and women’s risk for intimate partner violence and poor …

 – wa.gov [PDF] 
L Bensley, J Van Eenwyk, K Wynkoop … – American journal of preventive medicine, 2003 – Elsevier
 14. L. Bancroft and JG Silverman. The batterer as parent: addressing the impact
of domestic violence on family dynamics, Sage, Thousand Oaks CA (2002). 15.  
Cited by 71 – Related articles – All 11 versions


[BOOK] Children of alcoholics: A guidebook for educators, therapists, and parents

RJ Ackerman – 1983 – Learning Publications
Cited by 52 – Related articles – All 2 versions


[CITATION] The batterer as parent: Addressing the impact of domestic violence on family dynamics ( …

L Bancroft, JG Silverman – Brown, Frederico, Hewitt, & Sheehan, Problems and …
Cited by 2 – Related articles


Batterers‘reports of recidivism after counseling

A DeMaris, JK Jackson – Social Casework, 1987 – ncjrs.gov
 had problems with alcohol, and had witnessed violence between their parents. The
small sample size, the limited credibility of batterers‘ self-reports, and the 


WELL, what to do?  TALK some more?  Out of the hearing of women and children?

I’ve managed to talk myself into a few conferences — I couldn’t afford the entrance fees for the most part.  In one, I passed as a professional, up to a point.  In another, I spoke about my story, and the PTSD it triggered (I was inbetween court hearings about whether or not I’d ever see my kids again) caused me to misplace the car (and house) keys and almost have to spend a night on the streets, as I’d just lost contact with the last round of professional colleagues locally.  This MIGHT have cost me the last remaining job, but a very recent contact (and a current client) pulled off a “rescue.”  FYI, abuse runs in families, and families are not always there to assist in the buffer zone.

About two years later, I learned that this particlar domestic violence organization (which I mistakenly — it’s a common mistake — confused with a group that was intent in stopping violence against women, i.e., saving our lives, helping us leave situations like that — has a linguistic profile similar to the whitehouse.gov “virtually invisible in public agenda” absence of the word “mother” in its website.  A glance at the funding (more than a glance, actually) showed WHY.  


It’s easy to make a declaration if it’s a closed -corporation discussion.  It’s not that these groups don’t ACKNOWLEDGE the problems, but that they do not acknowledge how their SOLUTIONS exacerbate the already existing problems, of a parent with a REALLY bad attitude, and some REALLy serious problems that a few classes, or even a years’ worth, may or may NOT address.

And if these classes are concurrent with a typical course of action ina  faith-based institution, the effects PROBABLY will cancel each other out, when it comes to protection of women.


That’s about all the time I have to post today.  I hope this is proving informative. 

You cannot have fatherhood and feminists in the same government grants gene pool and expect to get further down the road.  The effects will cancel each other out, and leave yet larger and larger debt.


Currently, stipulations MANDATED by the VAWA act on Supervised Visitation (safe havens) contradict — categorically — with stipulations from the Health and Human Services “access visitation” grants.  There’s a history (and a financial profile) to this, and I’m reading it these days.  It took a while to grasp the “why.”  I had to apply a rule I thought I’d mastered earlier — don’t take ANYTHING at face value, and do your background research on who’s who and doing what with whom.  It’s a pain in the neck, but wise to do.  As I used to learn the field of my profession (music), the terminology, to distinguish good from excellent, and know who’s who in general in my field (and as to the organizations also), it can be done in these fields also.

Again, I am still getting nationwide and intercontinental visitors — any of you are welcome to comment, particularly if you have checked any of the links and agree, or disagree.  And remember — if you’re a parent, try to stay AWAY from the child support agency and work it out some other way, especially if you begin divorce or separation as a custodial mother.


 Caveat emptor. (“Buyer beware”) There is no free lunch — the bill comes in later.  You pay in your freedom, and you may very well pay with your future, and your children’s.

When she “Shows and Tells” — take it seriously. It takes courage.

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We tell young people to speak up about abuse.
This one did.”

Our global village — it seems to me that approximately one a week, at least nationwide, is occurring.  The police WILL respond, and will sometimes prevent or minimize the fall-out, but more likely (they are only human, they are not omnipresent) they will count and identify the bodies, and speak to reporters, and neighbors.  This is too late for those speaking up.    This can be true when it comes to domestic violence also.

Before you read this post — if you read fast, if you skim well, and if you could commit to read THREE (3) pages of single-spaced, narrative, print, you will understand more: Do NOT pass go.  Click on the centered title “Brave Children Speak Up” Read the first page “intro”, to the bottom, hit “next” or “continued,” then the next page to the bottom, click on “next” and then the 3rd page, to the bottom (individual stories).

Brave Children Speak Up

Alanna’s story is well-known — she finally fled from Northern California to Southern (Los Angeles) and was able to get help.

How I Process (present tense) My Experience (past)

I did not experience abuse as a child. Mine didn’t start til I was almost 40 years old. Yet I will affirm — you are not the same afterwards — your understanding of the world is not the same either, and never will be. You can function, but you sprout antenna, learn to “deal,” test your systems of meaning (all, for the most part, remain suspect), and are much, much, MUCH more alert to the various signals and possible interpretations of almost every one. This is rough on people you wish to maintain friendships, let alone a romantic connection, with. I know that I “tested.’ When my friend passed the test, didn’t blow up, didn’t run away, it frightened me more. I lost so many job situations that (for a period), I began to self-sabotage work rather than experience the forced-out situation again. (Economic control is a primary means of control). I felt like I was another species for a while, and finally accepted that, in some respects, I was. And I was NOT sexually abused as a child. . . . Or beaten. . . . Or deprived.

Negotiating what for others is often an Average situation:

[Leaving home.  Coming back home.   Possibly reporting what happened at home — to be continued. . . ]


One dilemma still up for grabs is a difficult one. I have faith, but I do not trust churches. This affects support systems and for sure sociability. But, I will affirm — there ARE people (both genders) who target these areas, and this IS one area a vulnerable (to being dominated to excess) women can be found. They also take in divorced and needy women, at times, hence, a charming unscrupulous man will find ample fields there.

One has to constantly renegotiate meaning in life. I have come to believe this is an asset. Intuition comes in handy in many fields (particularly artistic ones or ones that deal with group dynamics).

When abuse happens mid-way, or later in life, it is difficult to know what goals to set, in exiting it. It is also VERY difficult to exit it, as by middle age, so many professions, communities, and connections have come. More schooling is not always the answer. What about relationships?

I cannot imagine being a child who has betrayed by an adult.
Mine were (I will testify and do). But I cannot imagine it still, how to callous onesself and just go deal with it.

Brave Children Speak Up

I cannot think too hard on this one today.  I refuse to abuse substances to turn my mind away.  Each day’s internal parasympathetic (?) wiring stands alone, how much it can handle, but because I know what it’s like to have people “unable to stomach” my truths, I try to process and stomach others’ I read about.  Can you handle this one?  Perhaps you can.  Children in the situation HAVE to.  

I would like to say: It’s  not the gun, but the attitude in the person carrying the gun.  If it was not a gun, it could be a knife, an ax, or as happened recently a sword.  

It’s also another, more communal problem called “denial.”  

February 25, 2009

Police respond to “shots fired” and find family dead in murder-suicide

Editor’s note: This tragic incident is one of several like it that have surfaced recently. Although the exact details are not yet known, the mass violence it reflects needs to be noted.  

. . .  “It’s important to remember that one of the most dangerous persons an officer can face is someone who feels they’ve got nothing to live for and nothing to lose. There are a growing number of those people and that’s a very real threat to officer safety and survival. Now, more than ever, officers need to be highly trained, highly focused and thoroughly prepared to deal with the threats and challenges of doing their jobs in a time of crisis.”

Stay alert, be trained—even if it means taking steps to seek your own training—and remember that even “regular people” who would otherwise seem harmless and unlikely to pose a deadly threat, like the man in this incident, may in fact be extremely dangerous.

— Scott Buhrmaster, PoliceOne Managing Editor


RE:  “ someone who feels they’ve got nothing to live for “

My recommended reading:  Viktor Frankl, “Man’s Search for Meaning.”

There are choices, even in a concentration camp.

Another link that is not always explored, but should be, is the pharmaceutical connection.  I speak as someone whose father in law was on medication (and committed suicide).   Not smart to tinker too much with this chemistry.  My policy is, don’t!  Your body was designed smart:  handle with care.  

By Matt Sedensky 
Associated Press 

MIAMI — A 53-year-old man fatally shot his wife and two daughters Wednesday before turning the gun on himself, and a 16-year-old son who survived the attack managed to call 911 as he escaped uninjured from the Miami home, authorities said. . . .

Sarit Betancourt, a 44-year-old school bus driver who lives near the family, said the father is a Cuban immigrant who gave piano lessons at a guitar shop and at his home. Betancourt’s two sons, ages 9 and 10, had been taking piano lessons from him once a week since 2006.

“He was a marvelous person and a tremendous professor,” she said. “People would enter the house, and you just breathed peace.”

[WELL, not for a little girl….]



14 year old Priscilla Amador did not want to have sex or interact sexually with a man 40 years her senior.
Especially her father. About 8 years of this was too much. Finally she worked up courage to tell:
The Miami Herald, 2-27-09
It cost her -- and her sister -- and her mother - their lives. I speculate that HE could not stand the shame
or public exposure -- that task had been assigned (by him) for HER to carry. I'll say, assuming the
charges were valid. One way to cut short THAT conversation, well, see headlines.
"Be Prepared!" How? I don't know, but I know I must find out. So should you.
I cannot editorialize much today. I am processing this one... I have teens.
I also know that the issue is NOT primarily sex. It's about character, values,
and entitlements. I do not think we should be suspecting all our neighbors of this
(though clearly it's underreported). Perhaps we should all make sure that our kids
have at least ONE other NON-family member they can confide in, and who know them.
And we should all be informed of the overlap between wife abuse and child abuse.
And that our young women are to value, and be able to hold, boundaries. Unfortunately,
these boundaries are daily violated in so many contexts (including schools), that I'm at
some loss to, as I posted elsewhere, safety a "place." I think that self-sufficiency has
to be a THING you carry with you.  
As I said, today, there are limits to what can be processed. But I will not drop the topic.
Are you, reader, aware that in Family Courts across the nation, custody of children, when
contested, it being given to batterers in retaliation for reporting abuse of one form or another.
If you don't believe me, believe the children who reported, and lived to tell:

Jennifer Collins’ Family Fled the U.S. for Safey! From Court-Ordered Child Abuse. She aged out and spoke up. And others.

Related Articles:

 Six die in L.A. family murder-suicide 

 Police: L.A. man kills wife, 5 children, himself over job troubles

 Officials: Financial crisis can lead to violence 

 Police survey links crime spike to economy

 As economy dives, crime fears spike


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