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Archive for January 25th, 2020

‘Divorce Mediation [and] Domestic Violence’ (per a 1997 NIJ-funded report by Jessica Pearson, Ph.D. of CPR, (and now, FRPN.org) raises the question: Do the DV Industry USA Orgs. know about AFCC? (Yes!) Since When (I DNK: 1980s?). Are They Acknowledging AFCC? (Generally, No!). So? (Know Your Organizations!) [A Nov. 19, 2019, off-ramp from ‘Oh Arizona!’ Post, Publ. Jan. 25, 2020].

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Post title and shortlink:

‘Divorce Mediation & Domestic Violence’** (per a 1997 NIJ-funded report by Jessica Pearson, Ph.D. of CPR, (and now, FRPN.org) raises the questions: Does the DV Industry USA know about AFCC? (Yes!) Since When? (I DNK). Are These Orgs. Acknowledging This? (Generally, No!). So…? (Know Your Organizations!) [This Nov. 19, 2019, off-ramp from Post ‘Oh Arizona!,’ Publ. Jan. 25, 2020′]. (short-link ends “-bE7”)

**As published, I didn’t copy the study’s title right.  I’m fixing it in body of post, and, belatedly, the title, which recurs a few times in the post contents below.  The links are provided my posts anyhow; working on other aspects, I didn’t catch the error until today, Feb. 2, 2020.  Next inset discusses perhaps why.

Wording corrected in body of post, not the title above: It reads, as the links and now images provided make clear, instead:  “Divorce Mediation & Domestic Violence” in that order. I had reversed the order of topics and omitted the word “Divorce.”  

This is a raw topic for me (as a survivor whose court-appointed mediator immediately up-ended — weakened, all but undid — the restraining order, my basic rights to function independently as a person (2nd round), and finally, years later, to validate an illegal, baseless-facts-alleged and sudden custody switch AFTER the father had stolen (by refusing to return) both our children, still minors, on a court-appointed visitation with which I complied, but he, obviously, did not, i.e., in not returning them to my care.  

The “access and visitation” (shared parenting) version that followed was far harsher to me than it was ever to the father, despite his identified battering and violent behavior towards me (over the course of a decade), in front of our young children, and not ONE incident of any thing close to that — or anything illegal or even in contempt of our existing court orders since — regarding me.  His was weekly; mine began every-other-week (never made possible), then reduced to phone calls (I didn’t get them anyway) then basically, contact with my by then adolescent children — gone.  Their education (and as a result, paths towards college scholarships, which they’d both been one) was radically revamped.  I went two years without a glimpse of one child (I say “child” to avoid specifying gender), and barely saw the other.  This didn’t change until the younger one turned 18.  THE SAME MEDIATOR was employed through-out.  Although my children had been, in fact abducted on a court-ordered overnight visitation, on having to see a mediator (the same one that handled the original protective order years ago — court-appointed), this (man) ignored that reality — while I was still obviously in shock from it — and failed to produce or give me any intake form where (I learned later) I might at least have put a check-mark on the issue “child-stealing.”That “child-stealing” is a check-mark on a family court services mediation form tells you that these courts are indeed handling criminal issues, routinely. [This and previous paragraph expanded during edit Oct. 22, 2021].

At the time, while in major trauma handling the situation (and my existing work/life commitments, which I’d built around raising the children, as I had been for years after divorce), it was made “abundantly clear” that I would not get TO court without going through, again, mediation, and that no way was a different mediator than the one who’d previously undermined my stability and basic rights to make life choices — twice in five years — if I ever hoped to see my kids again.  All this was without CPS involvement or any criminal charges or alleged abuse. This obviously impacted my overall view of family court-connected mediation (before I even knew of AFCC, who I then learned were efficiently and relentlessly promoting mediation/conciliation courts, etc. over the decades in California and in specific hotspots across the USA).//LGH Feb. 2, 2020.

The earlier (1997) study and Award#: Divorce Mediation & Domestic Violence, (<~~link to the pdf) Found at NCJRS, Doc’t. 164658USDOJ / NIJ Award# 93-NIJ-CX-0036.  (Lead author Jessica Pearson).

(Four images from the front matter of this 235-pager! added only Feb 1, 2020):
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Written by Let's Get Honest|She Looks It Up

January 25, 2020 at 7:54 pm

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