Happy Hallowe’en and last day of yet another “Domestic Violence [Industry] Awareness Month,” R.I.P.
May it R.I.P.
Many have had precious little peace since we knocked at the doors for help, got some temporary relief, and didn’t realize that behind this emergency relief, came trailing a long chain of demands, with interest . . . . you can escape, but not your kids….
Many of us are still walking around like ghosts, having been truly eviscerated of our trust in basic institutions, or that “feminist” meant, includes those who have nothing to offer in return for services. Like, our kids, to appease the men’s groups some cut a deal with in order to retain some notoriety. Both sides agreed to not tell half the divorcing population what they needed to know about the 1996 welfare reform.
I married, and could’ve divorced (certainly the abuse began) before 1996 welfare reform and it having worked its way outward to the states and through the court mediation programs. Put in a timeline, my advice is, time to dig under the foundations and see what’s in there before building on top of them.
OK, this is an epitaph, and a personal admission to having been snookered. It’s also a long and probably incomplete sentence , so just deal with it, OK?
I wanted to get out a post on the 31st of October to say, as a survivor, etc. — that in my experienced (not “expert” which is why my stuff isn’t on the catalogue below) opinion, when a famous AFCC-connected judge, Judge Leonard Edwards (retired) can in plain open view (hidden out in open from my perspective) in 1991 co-found a Santa Clara Domestic Violence Council under the Office of Women’s Policy — and from there, in a rather unique and creative fiscal arrangement (which, if you scroll REAL real far down on my right sidebar, you’ll see I have a text widget about Women Judges which contains some related links) set up a nonprofit “Domestic Violence Intervention Council” (DVIC) to handle the proceeds of their yearly conferences — and then, from there, run a conference called “Domestic Violence Intervention: Engaging and Inspiring Men” with famous, allegedly Protecting Mothers (PMA) speaker Lundy Bancroft and also famous San Jose-based Jerry Tello National Compadres Network Trainer, i.e., a famous fatherhood connection — talk about that topic …
And given that AFCC is the primary PAS-promoter organization around, and in on the access/visitation grants (which very few state-wide DV coalitions are going to breath a whiff about) and all that….
And that, generally speaking this California Santa Clara County area contains San Jose and what’s also nationally known as Silicon Valley (ever heard the term) — and I, who don’t live that far away — didn’t see through the Crisis in the Court Crowd (to my credit, I did see through Lundy Bancroft much earlier, because I look things up and he was obviously conferencing with fathers’ rights groups inbetween presenting as an empathetic, healing tones to battered mothers audiences, without revealing his alter ego, or at least goings on) . . .
And that, moreover, these are now associated somehow with a nice religious group (cult) and running things out of places like “Cathedral of Faith” associated with Fuller Seminary and New Apostolic Reformation Dominionist Cults — and these are the chosen vehicle (they want to infiltrate and dominate government for Jesus — and are working their plan, too) — to mentor men coming out of PRISON?
All is healing and reconciliation? What I’m seeing has indeed been haunting information.
It’s time to let the Domestic Violence Movement Agencies, Agenda, and Rhetoric — die a natural death.
I do not for a moment pretend that what they describe doesn’t happen and isn’t a problem (I should know! We know assaults happen, and deaths happen). And police do put themselves in the line of fire in domestic situations, some have died from them, and people (especially men) are arrested for domestic violence crimes.
But, the policy language has been co-opted. At this point, it’s JUST an industry using some of life’s realities to jockey for better positioning with the least actual services provided or accountability for having sat by and failed to inform their own clients about the critical factor in the family courts — which is those federal fatherhood promotion funds, etc. Understandably so, when Supervised Visitation, which seems to be a primary concept (not all cases get this) and draws from the HHS side through Access/Visitation posts and from the DOJ side for “Safe Havens.” And there’s a bit of affirmative action going on among the fatherhood promotion sector, such that they know they have to include SOME personnel called “domestic violence” experts (or else) and have, generally speaking chosen ones that don’t interfere substantially with business as usual, or “out” the black hole of reporting on certain issues.
I’ll explain more in coming weeks (assuming I’m still around) but wanted to post this tonight. I’m posting this for symbolic reference to the profit in Domestic Violence Industry. Please don’t defeat the purpose by rushing out to buy!! If you want to know what domestic violence is, go to a public place, listen carefully and engage in conversation with someone who’s been through it. We are everywhere and often do not blend in well, particularly those who were parents.
Intermedia, Inc. – ya’ gotta love them — are so honest they post their own EIN# on the top of their web page and their “About Us” page apparently tells, really, what they do. Of course there are ways to check it out — but here’s a group admitting that its basic purpose is moving information product, some print, but mostly web-based and at a significant mark-up.
I found this looking for the EIN# (and haven’t found it yet) of another nonprofit making the rounds of the Family Court Crisis crowd. I don’t think my verbal jabs have impacted their sales, but they make me feel better for saying it out loud anyhow — these groups, as did others, would rather sell their analysis (and tell survivor’s stories, well-packaged) next to their solutions to stopping domestic violence.
In personal –and I do seek to make sure what’s my personal is also a well-informed — opinion, the last thing any of these can actually afford is to let the truth known about (a) the access/visitation and other federally funded grants, and along with it (b) an honest explanation of why they won’t engage in open dialogue with survivors of BOTH domestic violence AND who have been “Battered Mothers (losing) Custody” (a reference to BMCC if you didn’t get that) and who assert that there is a HUGE gap between this phrase:
“Family Court Crisis” (i.e., the crisis IN the family courts)”
and my assertion, that:
the Family Courts ARE the Crisis, and what’s more, they’re the tip of the iceberg. The question is, who’s still in the Titanic?
| Family Court Crisis: Our Children at Risk Family Court video |
DVD/VHS | 42 min. | $99.95 |
Anyhow, prices are indicators, and I’m glad to see that some have finally realized that “Arguing Richard Gardner (and Parental Alienation)” is old — so old it’s got a VHS version. Richard Gardner died, I believe after Meyer Elkin (1994). Meyer Elkin had a far larger and more long-lasting impact on custody cases than Gardner, which is probably why some wish to keep the focus on him, and not the man who helped establish some of the organizations that some of these people still associate with to this day.
| Debating Richard Gardner A program designed to stimulate discussion and to help experts understand the controversy surrounding Parental Alienation Syndrome |
DVD | 30 min. | $59.95 |
| Debating Richard Gardner Personal Version A Personal Version of Debating Richard Gardner |
DVD/VHS | 30 min. | $49.95 |
| Debating Richard Gardner VHS A program about controversey surrounding Parental Alienation Syndrome |
VHS | 30 min. | $9.95 |
Domestic Violence. Intermedia distributes some of the most popular domestic violence videos in the country.
A program for increasing awareness of domestic violence and abuse, particularly the dymanics of power and control
Add DVD to cart
Complete Collection of Domestic Violence Titles. Click on a title for more details:
| Title | Media | Length | Price |
|---|---|---|---|
| !Ya No Mas! Spanish language program examines domestic violence in seven different families |
DVD/VHS | 28 min. | $99.95 |
| A Life Without Fear English language Domestic Violence video about DV in the South East Asian community |
DVD | 27 min. | $79.00 |
| Alcohol and Men’s Violence Against Women Examines the myth that alcohol causes men to be violent towards women |
DVD | 30 min. | $189.00 |
| Batterers Will Kill Recognize the warning signs that exist prior to the occurrence of homicide |
DVD | 24 min. | $195.00 |
| Body-Orientated Therapy Sessions A DVD Series Demonstrating Somatic Psychotherapy |
DVD | 179 min. | $100.00 |
| Body-Orientated Trauma Therapy I: Clinical Perspectives Part of the DVD Series on Somatic Psychotherapy |
DVD | 45 min. | $125.00 |
| Body-Orientated Trauma Therapy II: Treatment Modalities Part of the DVD Series on Somatic Psychotherapy |
DVD | 52 min. | $125.00 |
| Body-Orientated Trauma Therapy III: Children and Groups Part of the DVD Series on Somatic Psychotherapy |
DVD | 45 min. | $125.00 |
| Body-Orientated Trauma Therapy: 3-Part Series A DVD Series on Somatic Psychotherapy |
DVD | 141 min. | $295.00 |
| Calling Home: A Collaboration to Protect the Elderly A combination drama and documentary about the issue of elder abuse |
DVD | 36 min. | $129.95 |
| Code of Silence: Officer-Involved Domestic Violence A program about domestic violence committed by law enforcement personnel. |
DVD | 17 min. | $189.00 |
| Compassion – Batterers Treatment Training video for participants of the HEALS batterers treatment program |
DVD | 10 min. | $99.00 |
| Dangerous Games: Power and Control in Teen Dating Relationships VHS Examines power and control in teen dating relationships |
VHS | 30 min. | $24.95 |
| Debating Richard Gardner A program designed to stimulate discussion and to help experts understand the controversy surrounding Parental Alienation Syndrome |
DVD | 30 min. | $59.95 |
| Debating Richard Gardner Personal Version A Personal Version of Debating Richard Gardner |
DVD/VHS | 30 min. | $49.95 |
| Debating Richard Gardner VHS A program about controversey surrounding Parental Alienation Syndrome |
VHS | 30 min. | $9.95 |
| Domestic Violence: Danger Assessment & Safety Planning A comprehensive training program about domestic violence |
DVD | 72 min. | $89.00 |
| Domestic/Elder Abuse A look at the isuue of domestic violence and elder specific to healthcare |
DVD | 36 min. | $325.00 |
| Echoes of Change The emotional, spritual, and psychological journeys of women who leave abusive relationships |
DVD | 7 min. | $49.00 |
| Escape the Abuse Our best-selling program about how to leave an abusive relationship |
DVD | 20 min. | $99.95 |
| Escape the Abuse VHS Our best-selling program about safely leaving an abusive relationship |
VHS | 20 min. | $19.95 |
| Every 15 Seconds: A Video About Family Violence A domestic violence program designed for military personnel |
DVD | 21 min. | $99.00 |
| Facing Diversity: Responding to Violence Against Women from Diverse Cultures Examines domestic violence from the perspective of different cultures |
DVD/VHS | 40 min. | $189.00 |
| Family Court Crisis: Our Children at Risk Family Court video |
DVD/VHS | 42 min. | $99.95 |
| Hostages at Home An excellent Domestic Violence awareness program |
DVD/VHS | 52 min. | $99.95 |
| Inside Domestic Violence: The Power and Control Wheel A program for increasing awareness of domestic violence and abuse, particularly the dymanics of power and control |
DVD | 21 min. | $189.00 |
| La Guerra En Casa A new Spanish DVD with English Subtitles about Domestic Violence |
DVD | 19 min. | $189.00 |
| Love You To Death A program about abusive relationships |
DVD | 35 min. | $229.95 |
| Love’s Not Supposed to Hurt: Dating Violence An interactive program about dating violence |
DVD | 30 min. | $99.95 |
| Mending Spirits Shows the emotional, spiritual and psychological jouneys of women who leave abusive relationships |
DVD | 58 min. | $189.95 |
| My Girlfriend Did It Explores the issue of same sex partner violence between women |
DVD | 40 min. | $150.00 |
| My Girlfriend Did It VHS Explores the issue of same sex partner violence between women |
VHS | 40 min. | $19.95 |
| No Way Out But One A new documentary about family courts and custody by the makers of Small Justice |
DVD | 60 min. | $195.00 |
| No Way Out But One – Legal Perspectives Examines the legal issues family courts and custody |
DVD | 85 min. | $229.00 |
| No Way Out But One – Personal Version A new documentary about family courts and custody by the makers of Small Justice |
DVD | 60 min. | $29.95 |
| Recognizing and Escaping Teen Dating Violence A powerful new problem about Teen Dating Violence |
DVD | 23 min. | $229.95 |
| SAFE: Inside a Battered Women’s Shelter Program on domestic violence narrated by Susan Sarandon |
DVD | 49 min. | $99.95 |
| Safety First Dramatic video about the importance of domestic violence protection orders |
DVD | 15 min. | $189.00 |
| Safety First (Primero Protejase) Spanish language dramatic video about the importance of domestic violence protection orders |
DVD/VHS | 15 min. | $189.00 |
| Safety Planning with Children Training program for professionals working with children witnessing family violence |
DVD/VHS | 32 min. | $189.00 |
| Secret Wounds Working With Child Observers of Family Violence |
DVD/VHS | 33 min. | $95.00 |
| Shadows of the Heart Treatment preparation program for domestic violence abusers |
DVD/VHS | 20 min. | $99.00 |
| Small Justice 30 Minute Version A 30-Minute version of our award winning program. |
DVD/VHS | 30 min. | $99.95 |
| Small Justice: Little Justice in America’s Family Courts Exposes the systematic legal failure of the family court system to protect children |
DVD | 56 min. | $79.95 |
| Small Justice: Little Justice In America’s Family Courts (Personal Edition) Exposes the systematic legal failure of the family court system to protect children |
DVD | 56 min. | $29.95 |
| Stepping into Latino Realities For professionals seeking to relate effectively with Latino communities and understand issues facing battered Latinas and their children. |
DVD/VHS | 25 min. | $99.95 |
| Survivors This animated video presents domestic violence in a different perspective |
DVD | 16 min. | $79.95 |
| Telling Amy’s Story A program that examines the events surrounding a domestic violence homicide |
DVD | 57 min. | $74.95 |
| Telling Amy’s Story: Training Package The comprehensive training version of Telling Amy’s Story |
DVD | 57 min. | $174.95 |
| The Ace Study: Childhood Trauma and Adult Health A ground breaking program that examines the longterm consequences of childhood trauma |
DVD | 89 min. | $225.00 |
| The Golden Years: A Glimpse into the Hidden Problem of Elder Abuse Short, powerful program about the subject of elder abuse |
DVD | 5 min. | $49.95 |
| The Hurting: Cutting for Relief Part of the Award-Winning Maple Ave Series, this program looks at the issue of self mutilation |
DVD | 20 min. | $89.00 |
| The Savage Cycle Emotional examination of domestic violence from a victim’s perspective |
DVD | 30 min. | $99.95 |
| The Savage Man Explores the roles of domestic violence from the abuser’s perspective |
DVD | 30 min. | $99.95 |
| The Troubling Cycle Examination of domestic violence in the Vietnamese community |
DVD/VHS | 22 min. | $49.95 |
| There’s No Place Like Home: Growing Up with Family Violence A new program about the impact of Domestic Violence on Children. |
DVD | 50 min. | $189.00 |
| Trauma and Substance Abuse Examines the correlation between substance abuse and a history of trauma |
DVD | 86 min. | $250.00 |
| Vicarious Trauma: Working with Trauma Survivors A Training CD-Rom for Professionals about Vicarious Traumatization |
CD-ROM | n/a | $99.00 |
| Voices of Survivors: Victims of Violent Crimes Speak Out Survivors share their stories about life after violent crimes |
DVD | 39 min. | $99.95 |
| When Boundaries are Crossed: Recognizing & Preventing Emotional Child Abuse Part of a new series on child abuse |
DVD | 26 min. | $109.00 |
| When Domestic Violence Comes to Work Training program for both employees and managers about the impact of domestic violence in the workplace |
DVD | 60 min. | $249.00 |
| When Domestic Violence Comes to Work (short version) 11 minute condensed version of When Domestic Violence Comes to Work 2000 |
DVD/VHS | 11 min. | $129.00 |
| When Injuries Speak, Who Will Listen? A Healthcare Response to Domestic Violence Training program for healthcare workers about identifying domestic violence |
DVD | 32 min. | $195.00 |
| When Injuries Speak, Who Will Listen? A Healthcare Response to Domestic Violence VHS Training program for healthcare workers about identifying domestic violence |
VHS | 32 min. | $79.00 |
| Wounds That Won’t Heal: The Adverse Childhood Experience Study A 30 Munute Summary of the complrehensive ACE Study Serries |
DVD | 30 min. | $39.95 |
| You’re Hurting Me Too! Our best-selling program about domestic violence and its effect on children |
DVD/VHS | 24 min. | $99.95 |
Let's Get Honest! Absolutely Uncommon Analysis of Family & Conciliation Courts' Operations, Practices, & History 
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