Let's Get Honest! Absolutely Uncommon Analysis of Family & Conciliation Courts' Operations, Practices, & History

NATIONAL FATHER’S RETURN DAY

http://thomas.loc.gov/cgi-bin/query/z?c106:S.+Res.+125`

I wish to publically beg forgiveness for having not noticed this action of Congress from 10 years ago. Now that I DID notice, I understand why some MSM (MainStreamMedia) suddenly got all excited — (coincidentally with the 10-year celebration coming up the next month of this) (and not? coincidentally, the week before “Mothers’ Day”– about the recent hope for Fatherhood Woes .

I had motherhood woes.  No, not the labor.  About losing them suddenly, on a day.  NO, not misplacing them.  Simultaneously I re-filed my understanding of the term “law enforcement” separately from “laws” and “enforce.”  Innocence lost, too.

Well, enough on that…

The link above is more comprehensive and easier to see than here, but I have still copied it for our viewing pleasure (and may take pleasure in a hasty comment or so also).

You know, Marshall MacLuhan wrote that when something becomes an art form, that something has already become extinct.  For example, during the industrial age, the rural landscape was all the rage.  Longing for days past, nostalgia.  The difference is, those were paintings.  

What should be taken into consideration in this resolution, in part, is how few female Congresswomen we actually have (though we are at least half the population).  So much for representative government.  I know women can be insane, but I tend to think we would  / should have more common sense, if women’s influence within Congress were not something to be so jealously protected.  We also would call it what it is: circumlocution, and calling the symptom, the cause.

If you have studied the topic (and I am), the key phrases will stand out.  They are not dropped accidentally into place, I assure you.

“Whereas more than 1 out of every 3 children currently live in a household where the child’s father does not reside; (Agreed to by Senate)”

How ironic that that the subject and verb do not agree in number in the first statement here.  Did you notice?  Also, more traditional style would’ve written out “1” and “3” as “one” and “three.”  

106th CONGRESS

1st Session

S. RES. 125

Encouraging and promoting greater involvement of fathers in their children’s lives and designating June 20, 1999, as `National Father’s Return Day’.

(I think they meant “Fathers’ Return,” plural)  Unless someone has appointed a National Father, and I wasn’t told…)

IN THE SENATE OF THE UNITED STATES

June 18, 1999

Mr. LIEBERMAN (for himself, Mr. GREGG, Mr. BAYH, Mr. BROWNBACK, Mr. MACK, Mr. DODD, Mr. DOMENICI, Mr. JEFFORDS, Mr. ALLARD, Mr. COCHRAN, Ms. LANDRIEU, Mr. BUNNING, Mr. ROBB, Mr. DORGAN, Mr. DASCHLE, Mr. AKAKA, Mr. GORTON, Mr. SMITH of Oregon, Mr. ENZI, Mr. BENNETT, Mr. HUTCHINSON, Mr. SESSIONS, Mr. DEWINE, Mr. CAMPBELL, and Mr. THURMOND submitted the following resolution; which was considered and agreed to

RESOLUTION

Encouraging and promoting greater involvement of fathers in their children’s lives and designating June 20, 1999, as `National Father’s Return Day’.

{{QUestion from the Floor:  What about serial monogamist fathers?  What about fathers who father a child by someone else while married?  Is this act going to clean up divorce permanently?  Otherwise, it could start to look like this:

Does this include wife #1, Girlfriend #2?  What if Girlfriend #2 comes with children?  Should she then fork them over to their former father, and make new ones with her Husband #2?  Are we moving into male polygamy, or are we assuming that Dads are going to have ONE woman and no others, and therefore that any woman who dares to give birth to children with a certain man, had better not leave him — OR, permit him to leave her either — or life is surely going to get confusing, fast….}}  

Whereas more than 1 out of every 3 children currently live in a household where the child’s father does not reside;

{{Does this include fathers killed in the Iraq war?  Or where Dad is in prison?  Or he was not originally from the U.S. and got deported (I do know one situation like this, and it happened with no warning).  Does this take into account the thousands across the nation in foster care with no mother or father?  I just want to know about those statistics.  Does this mean US only?? Because it doesn’t say so.}}

Whereas approximately half of all the children born in the United States will spend at least half of their childhood…

{{What about children NOT born in the United States, but now living here, as their parents (or one parent) is a citizen?  I know some like that….}}

 … in a family without a father figure;

{{{WAIT a minute!  Which is it we’re concerned about — biological paternity fathers, or any old father figure?  AND, Who took a survey saying that half the kids spent half their childhood with neither a father, NOR a father figure.  Will any old male do?  Or is it the biological bond we are talking about here?  Please be consistent…}}

Whereas approximately 40 to 50 percent of all marriages are predicted to end in divorce;

{{And the solution is to tell the divorcing fathers to go back?  Or the mothers divorcing for reasons such as unfaithfulness — or physical, or substance, including drug, abuse.  Or, say, a man declare’s he now prefers women — should this man stick around for a father figure?  To promote healthy marriages?}}{{Or, for that matter, if the woman does the same thing…}}{{I don’t mean to be troublesome, but I really do know a number of cases that fit this description}}

{{I myself was the product of an earlier generation of “stick together for the kids” family.  They did.  My mother’s voice was squashed in marriage.  She is to this day pretty passive.  I then was given a real great example, as a growing woman, of how to respect myself, and chose a man to marry who was abusive.  In fact HIS parents had done the same thing.  They just slept separately and one of them gave orders and (apparently) the other one did all the work.  As women tend to live longer, then both fathers died earlier in life (one, by suicide), and here are the older women, having stuck it out, but not having any real wisdom to impart to either generation.  With those cold, distant, under the same roof marriages, we ended up seeking community, met in that community, thought we knew each other (or at least I did), and had a disgraceful marriage marked by domestic violence from start til finish — and beyond, thanks to these Fathers Return” policies below.  

My ex, determined NOT to be like his own parents, ended up doing so anyhow.  He was concerned about living at the same address, not about what went on under its roof.  He gave orders and expected me to fulfil them (and work).  If I didn’t, there was the assault.  I do not, really, think that this was preferable to having separated earlier.  

If I had had a mother who respected herself and was strong (or permitted to be in that time), perhaps I would’ve known to separate at the beginning of the violence.  Of course, then I would have to face these types of policies sooner or later, better dead and in a 2-parent household, than single and not.  He could then remarry (if he didn’t do himself in as well), and then whoever survived would qualify for being in a healthy marriage}}{{I’m spilling some guts here, to illustrate how to THINK– or at least to engage in comparing proclamation to reality you actually personally know, when a proclamation is made:  DOES that shoe fit life as you have experienced it, or are aware of others who have?  Or does it just make a nice clack, clack sound on the hard floors of the Senate Rotunda (if the floor is indeed hard — ain’t been there recently).  }}

Whereas approximately 3 out of every 5 divorcing couples have at least 1 child;

Whereas almost half of all children aged 11 through 16 that live in mother-headed homes have not seen their father in the last 12 months;

• Oh NO! ! ! !   a MOTHER-HEADED home.  That’s a phrase I hear about a lot, in the general public, as a social problem.  ANYTHING but a MOTHER-HEADED home.  
• Not seen their father in the last 12 months – – – First of all, according to WHOM?  Cite your data.  Is this including people who were married and divorced, after living together, or are the figures lumped together with wild oats sown during (or shortly after) high school.  Have you compensated for the Mormons or Mormon off-shoots who actually practice polygamy?  That would skew the figures, some, eh?  Those are all different situations.  ALSO, some of those fathers (disproportionately African Americans) are incarcerated.  IN the process of “National Fathers Return” day, is there going to be a new, general amnesty to restore the balance in the community?  

Whereas 79 percent of people in the United States believe that the most significant family or social problem facing the country is the physical absence of fathers from the home, resulting in a lack of involvement of fathers in the rearing and development of children;

{{If you don’t want to talk back to THAT claim, you are not awake.  Let me help….}}

“Whereas 79 percent of people in the United States believe”

• ACCORDING TO WHOM?  Our founding fathers were talking about events that were commonly known, and did not have access to the Internet — or for that matter, a public library system, or many things we now take for granted.  It is irresponsible in this Congress to fail to cite references.  The mere fact of being a Senator or a Representative (yes, they did one of these too), does NOT carry with it the gift of prophecy and clairvoyance.  We deserve some cites.  And to examine the sources of those cites.  The casual flippant format of these statements is disrespectful.  It sounds “august” but doesn’t show a grassroots movement, and doesn’t show facts.  IN FACT, whose idea was it?  Is this coming from single Moms?  If this is the unanimous sentiment of the children themselves, then why are we seeing sites like “Courageouskids.net” to document kids that WERE put with their (abusive, molesting) Dads and it traumatizeid their lives.  Why are we reading about intact families that are getting wiped out, still, these days, when a Dad is distressed over the economy.  Over, his wife’s intended divorce?  Or what about Leichtenberg, Castillo, untold others, in Illinois (that was in 1999, future, but is a consequence and fall out of this type of limited thinking.  THEY GOT their fathered selves back into kids’ lives — and they KILLED THEIR KIDS.  (also happening overseas:  Dad in Australia picks one of his three young children to drop off a bridge to yer young death — and of two boys and a girl, it just happened to be the girl.  Gonzales’ father was “in” his children’s lives — and this SINGLE-HEADED-MOM-HOUSEHOLD pleaded with police to do something, they didn’t, and the result was 3 dead children in the back of a pickup.  I think the Dad died too.  This REALLY does not bear scrutiny as a nationwide policy.).  

{I missed that poll — did you?  Perhaps because that season, I was busy filling out a restraining order, after seeking support, help, and refuge from the father who WAS present in the home}}

Whereas the likelihood that a young male will engage in criminal activity doubles if he is reared without a father and triples if he lives in a neighborhood comprised largely of single-parent families;

Whereas studies reveal that even in high-crime, inner city neighborhoods, over 90 percent of children from safe, stable, 2-parent homes do not become delinquents;

Whereas compared to children reared in 2-parent families, children reared in single-parent families are less likely to complete high school and thus, more likely as adults to obtain low paying, unstable jobs;

Whereas researchers have linked the presence of fathers with improved fetal and infant development, and father-child interaction has been shown to promote a child’s physical well-being, perceptual abilities, and competency for interpersonal relations;

LIKE THIS ONE?  

Whereas researchers have also found that both boys and girls demonstrate a greater ability to take initiative and exercise self-control when they are reared by fathers who are actively involved in their upbringing;

Whereas the general involvement of parents in the lives of their children has decreased significantly over the last generation;

{{I relate this to the educational system. . . .}}

Whereas a Gallup Poll indicated that over 50 percent of all adults agree that fathers today spend less time with their children than their fathers spent with them;

Whereas nearly 20 percent of children in grades 6 through 12 report that they have not had a meaningful conversation with even 1 parent in over a month;

AGAIN, THIS IT NOT TYPICAL OF HOMESCHOOLERS, WHO I AM SURE WERE NOT POLLED.  IN FACT, ONE OF THE MORE OUTSTANDING CHARACTERISTICS OF THEM IS THAT THEY DO SPEAK MORE WITH THEIR PARENTS!  AND OTHER ADULTS!

Whereas in a broad survey of 100,000 children in grades 6 through 12, less than half of the children `feel they have family boundaries or high expectations from parents or teachers’;

Whereas 3 out of 4 adolescents report that `they do not have adults in their lives that model positive behaviors’;

Whereas in a widely cited study of the health risks to the young people in the United States, University of Minnesota researchers found that `independent of race, ethnicity, family structure and poverty status, adolescents who are connected to their parents, their schools, and to their school community are healthier than those who are not’, and that `when teens feel connected to their families, and when parents are involved in their children’s lives, teens are protected’;

Whereas millions of single mothers in the United States are heroically struggling to raise their children in safe and loving environments;

Whereas promoting responsible fatherhood is not meant to diminish the parenting efforts of single mothers, but rather to increase the chances that children will have 2 caring parents to help them grow up healthy and secure;

Whereas many of this country’s leading experts on family and child development agree that it is in the best interest of both children and the United States to encourage more 2-parent, father-involved families to form and endure;

Whereas in 1994, the National Fatherhood Initiative was formed to further the goal of raising societal awareness about the ramifications of father absence and father disengagement by mobilizing a national response to father absence;

{{ODD TIMING THAT< WITH THE PASSAGE OF VAWA}}

Whereas the Congressional Task Force on Fatherhood Promotion and the Senate Task Force on Fatherhood Promotion that were formed in 1997, the Governors’ Task Force on Fatherhood Promotion of 1998, and the Mayor’s Task Force on Fatherhood Promotion of 1999 were created to work in partnership with the National Fatherhood Initiative;

Whereas on June 14, 1999, the National Fatherhood Initiative is holding a national summit on supporting urban fathers in Washington, D.C., to mobilize a response to father absence by many powerful sectors of society, including public policy, social services, educational, religious, entertainment, media, and civic groups; and

Whereas those groups are working across party, ideological, racial, and gender lines in order to reverse the trend of father absence and disengagement by encouraging and supporting responsible fatherhood and greater father involvement in children’s lives: Now, therefore, be it

Resolved, That the Senate–

•  
  (1) recognizes that the creation of a better United States requires the active involvement of fathers in the rearing and development of their children;

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  (2) urges each father in the United States to accept his full share of responsibility for the lives of his children, to be actively involved in rearing his children, and to encourage the emotional, academic, moral, and spiritual development of his children;

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  (3) urges the States to hold fathers who ignore their legal responsibilities accountable for their actions and to pursue more aggressive enforcement of child support obligations;

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  (4) encourages each father to devote time, energy, and resources to his children, recognizing that children need not only material support, but also, more importantly, a secure, affectionate, family environment;

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  (5) urges governments and institutions at every level to remove barriers to father involvement and enact public policies that encourage and support the efforts of fathers who do want to become more engaged in the lives of their children;

•  
  (6) to demonstrate the commitment of the Senate to those critically important goals, designates June 20, 1999, as `National Father’s Return Day’;

•  
  (7) calls on fathers around the country to use the day to reconnect and rededicate themselves to their children’s lives, to spend National Father’s Return Day with their children, and to express their love and support for them; and

•  
  (8) requests that the President issue a proclamation calling on the people of the United States to observe `National Father’s Return Day’ with appropriate ceremonies and activities.